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Post by clementine on Oct 22, 2018 7:53:01 GMT -6
What’s good, MA18?
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Post by clementine on Oct 22, 2018 7:57:08 GMT -6
We survived our Nashville trip... barely. Sleep was horrendous, but he did much better in his own bed last night. I’m so glad we have no overnight trips planned until Thanksgiving. I’m ready to be home for a while.
8 months old today! He’s literally all over the place now, I can’t even believe it. He started almost bear crawling on his hands and feet and is pulling up on some things.
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Post by mrsmonogrammed on Oct 22, 2018 7:58:15 GMT -6
We went to a family wedding this weekend and O got to meet 2 out of 3 other baby boy cousins born since Feb’18! They were all so cute together😊 but now he’s trying to kill me with wake ups after sleeping in the hotel all weekend🤪
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polson
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Post by polson on Oct 22, 2018 8:07:49 GMT -6
we were up 4x last night so add us to crappy sleep club. h has been working a ton so he took today off randomly. heading to the zoo shortly. why do places wait to open at 10? we ate also planning on attempting dinner out with both girls. even if it’s bad at least there’ll be pizza.
we are also finally getting our new boiler today. so hopefully we won’t be losing heat this winter...but also goodbye monies
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Post by mintyblueair on Oct 22, 2018 9:03:03 GMT -6
We had such a great day yesterday! My parents came over for a bonfire in the afternoon and we had mulled wine, followed by aperol spritzes and dinner, brownies for dessert. My 2 year old didn't nap so both he and the baby were in bed by 7.
Baby woke up earlier than normal this morning so she went for her first nap early... I'm hoping it's a long one!
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Post by leatherpants on Oct 22, 2018 13:24:47 GMT -6
Happy Monday ladies and babies
I was getting nostalgic this weekend and spent a lot of time reading early threads on this board and our intros etc. you guys were the sweetest to me and it made me cry all over again. This time last year was rough and you guys were so supportive and kind. I love reading those over again.
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Post by leatherpants on Oct 22, 2018 13:26:36 GMT -6
On a less sappy note, we are having sleep bs over here too. He’s refusing to take his third nap, I’ve moved his bedtime up but unless I want to put him to bed at 4 and get up at 5 am (which - just moves our day up and doesn’t really solve my issue), there is way too much time between the wakeup of the last nap and bedtime.
It’s creating a lot of wakeups at night and it’s driving me bananas.
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Post by mintyblueair on Oct 22, 2018 14:38:20 GMT -6
Ugh, my 27 month old refused to nap again today. It's been happening here and there for the past several weeks, but now it either takes him an hour to fall asleep or he just doesn't sleep at all. I'm so not ready for him to stop napping 😭
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Leaf 🌱
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Post by Leaf 🌱 on Oct 22, 2018 14:52:40 GMT -6
DH never complains. All I do is complain. Help. I can’t figure out how people do this **waves hands around**  What am I missing here? Why can’t Infigure out how to keep the house clean and the laundry moving, go to work, spend time with my kids, make sure everyone is fed, and exercise occasionally? That is literally the minimum. I should be better at this. Lots of people get a lot more done and do a better job. We have the same number of hours in the day. WTAF. |
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polson
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Post by polson on Oct 22, 2018 15:10:11 GMT -6
leatherpants i am trying to figure out the nap thing too. we have moved bedtime to 6-630 but that means 530-6 wakeups and it’s too early. this is what happened with my older one and we never figured it out with her. i have resigned myself to waking up at 445-5 just to get me time, but then if i’m not in bed by 9 i freak out. mintyblueair my nearly 3 year old is starting to give us a hard time with naps so i’m sure were headed in the no nap direction too. i know we have made it longer than some, but 😭 i’m not ready either Leaf 🌱 you are literally describing me as well. if you figure out the secret please share. some days are just so much easier than others. i find if i just stay so busy that i can’t stop to think about things it’s not as hard.
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Post by stardust84 on Oct 22, 2018 15:43:22 GMT -6
On a less sappy note, we are having sleep bs over here too. He’s refusing to take his third nap, I’ve moved his bedtime up but unless I want to put him to bed at 4 and get up at 5 am (which - just moves our day up and doesn’t really solve my issue), there is way too much time between the wakeup of the last nap and bedtime. It’s creating a lot of wakeups at night and it’s driving me bananas. I would start extending the time between naps slowly and get rid of the 3rd nap. It will suck for a week or so during the day but waking constantly at night sucks too. L dropped nap #3 around 6 months and now is awake between naps for 3.5 to 4 hours. |
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Post by stardust84 on Oct 22, 2018 15:45:45 GMT -6
Ugh, my 27 month old refused to nap again today. It's been happening here and there for the past several weeks, but now it either takes him an hour to fall asleep or he just doesn't sleep at all. I'm so not ready for him to stop napping 😭 I hope it is just a phase for your sake.l and he starts napping again. How long does he sleep at night? Unfortunately a couple of the kids in my neighborhood dropped their nap around then. |
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Post by leatherpants on Oct 22, 2018 16:00:14 GMT -6
On a less sappy note, we are having sleep bs over here too. He’s refusing to take his third nap, I’ve moved his bedtime up but unless I want to put him to bed at 4 and get up at 5 am (which - just moves our day up and doesn’t really solve my issue), there is way too much time between the wakeup of the last nap and bedtime. It’s creating a lot of wakeups at night and it’s driving me bananas. I would start extending the time between naps slowly and get rid of the 3rd nap. It will suck for a week or so during the day but waking constantly at night sucks too. L dropped nap #3 around 6 months and now is awake between naps for 3.5 to 4 hours. Yeah you’re right. I guess we’ll have to work on that. He usually does an hour and a half to two hours. He’s just napping really well right now and the times he’s had to be up longer, his naps have gone to the 40 min nap. My plan today was to come to the park so hopefully he has a quick car nap so we can make it to bedtime. That’s my interim plan - third nap however possible - until we can manage that longer wake time. |
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Post by mintyblueair on Oct 22, 2018 18:49:55 GMT -6
Ugh, my 27 month old refused to nap again today. It's been happening here and there for the past several weeks, but now it either takes him an hour to fall asleep or he just doesn't sleep at all. I'm so not ready for him to stop napping 😭 I hope it is just a phase for your sake.l and he starts napping again. How long does he sleep at night? Unfortunately a couple of the kids in my neighborhood dropped their nap around then. A normal day was 2 hours of nap, 11-11.5 hours of night sleep. On days he doesn't nap he gets 12-12.5 hours overnight. I'm going to keep putting him in his crib for an hour in the afternoons and pray that it's just a phase... |
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Post by stardust84 on Oct 22, 2018 19:45:53 GMT -6
I hope it is just a phase for your sake.l and he starts napping again. How long does he sleep at night? Unfortunately a couple of the kids in my neighborhood dropped their nap around then. A normal day was 2 hours of nap, 11-11.5 hours of night sleep. On days he doesn't nap he gets 12-12.5 hours overnight. I'm going to keep putting him in his crib for an hour in the afternoons and pray that it's just a phase... That is what I would do. You could always try shortening night sleep to get a nap as well. DS1 is 3.5 and we cut DC naps so he would sleep better on weeknights because he was only sleeping 9 hours at night if he napped at DC. Our weekends are pretty busy so he still naps and sleeps better at night to make up for the week. |
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Post by clementine on Oct 22, 2018 21:25:12 GMT -6
Ok I don’t know what is going on but this up every half hour thing is not okay. Especially because H is out of town for work all week.
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Post by dizzycooks on Oct 22, 2018 23:14:24 GMT -6
@leatherpands and polson I’ve actually convinced my kids you must nap until kindergarten. Not to say it’s long and it’s certainly not daily, but if I send you for nap, you go, unless you’re in K. We do typically skip 2-3 days a week if I count weekends and bedtime is really early those days. On the plus side, the schoolager sill crashes by 7 as well. On the other hand all of my kids are awake by 630am which bites on nights like tonight when the baby won’t sleep. Leaf 🌱 Ms Merry Sunshine I am not. I consider myself a realist. It makes me feel better, but I’m not sure it’s helpful 😆. I only work pt and I can’t keep my sh!t together. Dh and I just discussed how we literally work or do laundry/basic chores/feed people all day long and we never.get.ahead. Period. It’s a standing joke that cleaning is a pointless task. They will spill or track dirt through as soon as we are done. Why should I torture myself?? I sound like we live in filth. I promise we don’t. |
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Post by dizzycooks on Oct 22, 2018 23:17:35 GMT -6
Ok I don’t know what is going on but this up every half hour thing is not okay. Especially because H is out of town for work all week. I am having the same issues this week!! Why won’t he sleep? Oh and my dh is home. I may kill him. He’s just “so tired”. He’s “exhausted” and can hardly move. 😒 I told him what I thought of that. 🤔🤭🙄 |
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Post by nevertoomanyshoes on Oct 23, 2018 3:59:17 GMT -6
Our naps are still all over the place. It all rests on a) what time he gets up and b) if the first nap is a cat nap (usually is) or a real nap. Poor daycare are like “so what’s his routine?” And I’m all ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ whatever he decides it is today!
Annoying.
He’s still going to bed at 5pm too, even if he has an afternoon car nap. Sigh. Seems destined to be an early to bed early riser like his brother. Guess that’s better than them being opposite to each other.
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Post by clementine on Oct 23, 2018 5:11:52 GMT -6
Ok I don’t know what is going on but this up every half hour thing is not okay. Especially because H is out of town for work all week. I am having the same issues this week!! Why won’t he sleep? Oh and my dh is home. I may kill him. He’s just “so tired”. He’s “exhausted” and can hardly move. 😒 I told him what I thought of that. 🤔🤭🙄 Oh heck no, dizzycook H. If my H complains about being tired after all his meetings this week, I will most definitely remind him of his 4 nights of uninterrupted sleep in a nice cushy hotel room. |
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cornpop
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Post by cornpop on Oct 23, 2018 6:24:48 GMT -6
Leaf 🌱 and polson
My H and I were going to couples counseling right before we got pregnant with N and the literal best thing that came out of it was her really pushing me to accept the least and being okay with that. Our house is messy 95% of the time, but we're always in clean clothes. I only cook 75% of the time, but we're always fed.
What really worked for us was remembering what we used to be like pre-kids. Our house was messy sometimes, we ate out or ordered in sometimes and it never bothered me. Then I had kids and I used to strive for perfection and was very unhappy with anything less. But now, I really have tried to let that go. My H and I call it "back to breezy". Learning to accept that things are never going to be perfect really made me a lot happier.
Also, routines! The more I do things repetitively the smoother things seem to go.
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polson
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Post by polson on Oct 23, 2018 6:45:51 GMT -6
cornpop totally agree with routines and lowering expectations. i am just struggling with the sahm part of this. i feel like because i’m home and dd1 is going to daycare 3x a week that i have no excuse to not have things “perfect” i also know that is an expectation i put on myself. h could really care less about a clean house and hardly notices when things aren’t picked up/clean (which is a whole other issue - like i feel like all my efforts go unappreciated? i dunno) my anxiety also ramps when the house is a mess. housework is a hamster wheel. i know i have an important job, but i’m struggling with my identity at this point. which is also an entirely different issue but i feel like all these things are tied together for me.
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cornpop
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Post by cornpop on Oct 23, 2018 6:50:03 GMT -6
I feel ya polson. I am sure there's so much more pressure to have everything perfect when you're SAH. And yeah, needing to find something that is only yours is definitely important. If I didn't have my buti classes, I would LOSE my freaking mind. My teacher reminds us a lot that we need to take care of ourselves and fill our cup before we can fill anyone else's. It sounds super corny but it's seriously true. The days when I am running myself ragged I am a much worse mom. |
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Leaf 🌱
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Post by Leaf 🌱 on Oct 23, 2018 6:59:40 GMT -6
cornpop I think the routine is what we’re missing. We’ve had a bunch of disruptions to our routines lately and need to eat back on track. I also have just been solo-parenting a ton, but DH has been in and out a ton for a day here and there and it’s preventing me from just being like “suck it up Dads not here, we’re on our own.” I also think I just need to schedule a date night. I feel like DH and I just tag team kids until bedtime, then speed clean, maybe watch a show, then head to separate corners to decompress. We are definitely surviving not thriving. calendula are you doing OTF hell week?
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polson
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Post by polson on Oct 23, 2018 7:04:19 GMT -6
Leaf 🌱 you are describing every night for h and me. also yes to surviving not thriving. i keep asking when it’s not going to feel like this. i always get stressed at the thought of date night (finding a sitter, baby not taking a bottle, staying out “late”) but im always glad that we get out once it happens and it makes everything else a little easier for awhile.
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Post by mrsmonogrammed on Oct 23, 2018 7:08:03 GMT -6
Leaf 🌱 you’ve inspired me to schedule a date night, we’re in desperate need of one too. I have a text in to the babysitter and now I’m off to find something fun to do!
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Post by leatherpants on Oct 23, 2018 7:52:10 GMT -6
When I started single parenting, it felt like the entire world was crushing me and iI was failing miserably in every aspect. It was really hard, but also really hard on my self-identity too so I totally get that Leaf 🌱. Like when things get tough, why am I not powering through this new challenge and kicking ass? Who am I? Then I read this thing or heard it somewhere and it really helped keep my expectations in check. It was like Family Friends Yourself Romance Home Work Pick 3. Because no one can really do more than three at a time. It was probably something on Pinterest ha, but it really has helped me pull back when I felt overwhelmed. It still does too. |
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Post by leatherpants on Oct 23, 2018 7:54:01 GMT -6
Also this;  |
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Post by calendula on Oct 23, 2018 8:30:43 GMT -6
Leaf 🌱, yes I signed up for my classes! I want that shirt!
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Post by mintyblueair on Oct 23, 2018 9:48:02 GMT -6
We're also in need of a date night here! My husband has two job interviews, one this week and one next. They are both research scientist positions and would make such a huge, huge difference for us, so the pressure is high for him right now. He's working evenings and weekends to keep up with everything, so I'm feeling the strain of keeping up at home and basically never leaving the house. Once these interviews are over with we'll get my parents to babysit while we have dinner out, maybe a movie.
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