UO/TFFC

[coconutbacon]

Aug 2, 2024 11:11:32 GMT -6 Eagles said:

Aug 2, 2024 10:26:41 GMT -6 mothafuckinteatime said:

Ive been having issues with some chronic digestive stuff and Dr suggested I try abdominal compression on a daily basis. She mentioned that shapewear is often enough to help, so I purchased a couple of options.

Today I put this thing on after my shower, and y’all, I don’t know if it was the steam in the bathroom or I’m that out of shape but I got it halfway up, got overwhelmed, and had to sit down for a break. I couldn’t get the thing unrolled/slid up in the right spots or get a good crib or I don’t know what. My H couldn’t stop laughing. It was so embarrassing. 😆

Something similar happened to me with a sports bra. I yelled for H to help me because I was stuck stuck and he was dying. I was like "help before I dislocate my shoulder motherfucker!"

Now I stand in front of a fan on the bathroom counter to get my tits fully dry.

I have multiple times triggered a neck spasm taking off a sports bra. The struggle is real!

[angelashly]

Aug 2, 2024 12:03:26 GMT -6 Eagles said:

Aug 2, 2024 11:48:30 GMT -6 beatch said:

Getting a sports bra off should be an Olympic event. I have almost no boobs and it's HARD.

This wasn't even getting it off, it was getting it on after I got out of the shower! But you reminded me that I pulled a muscle in my neck taking one off before. I'm a beautiful disaster.

Yes you are ❤️

[pobre]

Aug 1, 2024 10:18:22 GMT -6 beatch said:

I like living alone, having my own space, but it definitely made me realize I'm not as introverted as I thought I was! I WFH so I've found I need to fill my calendar so I get more interaction than I am getting at work.

FFFC...I was seeing a guy I really liked up until about a month ago. He's 39, I'm 42, he wants kids and I'm not sure. We broke up about a month ago but he hit me up this week and I'll probably bang him again next week when he's back in town. Ya girl is horny.

Online dating guys...it's wild. It's a women's game because the apps are flooded with men but I wouldn't consider 0.05% of them. I'm absolutely not going to entertain a man that won't add to my life, and there's a lot of people just putting their baggage out there. I also need to figure out a way to make money helping men get better photos for the apps. Because the amount of car selfies and dirty mirror selfies...yikes on bikes y'all.

I'm seeing a 33 year old who doesn't want kids (I have one) and there is no long term potential.

Oh well, he is hot and leaves when I ask him to.

[mothafuckinteatime]

I channeled my inner secretary mayor Pete last night when I challenged our HOA to answer for egregious spending. The pres is a landscape designer and we have spent $338k over budget on fucking landscaping.

It was really refreshing to just throw it all out there.

[justbecause]

I F I’m ever in the dating pool again I’m fully prepared to go ten years older.

[piratecat]

A little while ago I watched a Korean reality-type show that takes place in Mexico. So the main characters are speaking in Korean, and then the editors add some commentary in English but there is a lot of peripheral dialogue in Spanish that isn't translated in either language. I enjoyed the show but always found that part odd but figured those parts weren't that important? But why include so much of it? It became a good show to have on in the background while working on the house because I didn't have to pay a lot of attention to it. I recently rewatched it, got to the very end of the last episode of the season when I finally had a lightbulb moment and realized that I needed to turn closed captioning on. WTF.

[ontherocks]

@stp, maybe I haven’t seen as many TTs, but I don’t see the underconsumption trend to be that extreme. I’m not saying people won’t take it to the extreme for views, but the posts I’ve seen are more about using product until it’s gone before buying a replacement. Or wearing clothes until they are worn out before replacing them. Trying to consume food before it goes bad instead of buying mass amounts and having tons of waste.

I see more “over consumers” with the decade old make up because they have hoarding tendencies when it comes to items.

I can’t figure out how to tag, sorry.

[loony]

My dad came for his yearly visit this weekend.

His wife has a girls weekend at their house once a year and he’s not allowed to be there. He used to go camping alone or schedule his brothers backpacking trip the same weekend, but the last three years he’s come here.

I love my dad, but his wife is a hosebeast and these are the only three times he’s driven the 2 hours to my house since we’ve lived here (10+ years). We lived 45 minutes away for the 10 years before that and I only saw him once every 5 years. The kids barely know what to call him.

His wife hates me, and is legit a bitch, so I refuse to let her see my children in her space, because my 10 year old has known since she was 4 that “that lady” isn’t very nice. Her words, not mine.

He’s retired now, so we may see him more, but it’s just awkward and sad.

My mom has her own issues, but her husband is the best thing my kids could ask for in a Papa and what I could ask for in a father figure.

I basically parented my dad through this whole weekend. He couldn’t even begin to know what to do to support me after 30+ years. I only entertain him so my kids get to know him as much as they can. It does nothing for me but make me sad that he is so disconnected from my life and has been for so long. There are other things dealing with my disabled sister and child support that soured the relationship, but bottom line is that he hasn’t been a parent to me since the early 90s.

So I’m ending the weekend on a kind of sad note in addition to being thankful that boundaries have become much more acceptable.

[addymac]

Hugs loony. That is tough. Hope you can take some time and let yourself feel your feels.

[Wtfshouldmynamebe]

I’m going to a conference where these three people are headliners/keynotes: Nelly, Amanda Gorman, Adam kinzinger

I had to google one of them. Probably not the one you think

[babybean]

I’m so sorry, loony. I have a similar relationship with my father. Christmas Eve last year he texted blaming me for keeping the kids from him (he hasn’t met my youngest) and it made me hysterical. We’re 2 hours away as well and he’s gone fishing up around my area and not wanted to come by. I refuse to beg for crumbs so I don’t even ask. It’s hard mourning someone who’s still alive. I haven’t worked through my sadness and compartmentalize a lot, but setting boundaries is important. Protect your peace.

[STP]

I'm sorry loony.

[overboard]

I’m sorry loony. I have a similar situation with my mom and it’s hard. Hugs.

[angelashly]

((Hugs)) loony

I’ll say what I say to myself often. Just because they are blood or family doesn’t mean that they deserve to have a relationship with you or your kids if they don’t pull their weight.

For a long time I kept trying because of my sisters and dd in they same feeling like you that I wanted my kid to have this relationship with my mom like I had with my grandma. Now at 13 dd still tries some when we are in big family party settings but she also tells me that she always knew that I was the one doing the work and that she doesn’t need someone to be forced she has plenty of love

All this to say I’m a PM away

[Rusty Red]

Aug 2, 2024 16:23:13 GMT -6 justbecause said:

I F I’m ever in the dating pool again I’m fully prepared to go ten years older.

My fiance is 12 years my senior.

[beatch]

Aug 2, 2024 13:23:22 GMT -6 pobre said:

Aug 1, 2024 10:18:22 GMT -6 beatch said:

I like living alone, having my own space, but it definitely made me realize I'm not as introverted as I thought I was! I WFH so I've found I need to fill my calendar so I get more interaction than I am getting at work.

FFFC...I was seeing a guy I really liked up until about a month ago. He's 39, I'm 42, he wants kids and I'm not sure. We broke up about a month ago but he hit me up this week and I'll probably bang him again next week when he's back in town. Ya girl is horny.

Online dating guys...it's wild. It's a women's game because the apps are flooded with men but I wouldn't consider 0.05% of them. I'm absolutely not going to entertain a man that won't add to my life, and there's a lot of people just putting their baggage out there. I also need to figure out a way to make money helping men get better photos for the apps. Because the amount of car selfies and dirty mirror selfies...yikes on bikes y'all.

I'm seeing a 33 year old who doesn't want kids (I have one) and there is no long term potential.

Oh well, he is hot and leaves when I ask him to.

Personally I find myself much more attracted to men in their thirties. Maybe men in their forties in this area just have not taken good care of themselves or have a lot more baggage. The thirty-year-olds are a lot more fun.

[newspapers]

These updates! STP, treeofheaven, I hope everyone stays safe.

Rusty Red, I didn’t know you got engaged! Congrats!

McBenny
As someone who carries two dx and would likely qualify for a third were I to pursue it, I always ask what a late dx does for someone. Is it to qualify for treatment or get meds? Is it to make sense of childhood and/or current difficulties? I have been vocal here about my reservations regarding self dx, but I suppose if it helps people without access to diagnosing professionals understand themselves better, I can put the haterade back in the fridge for a bit. In my own case, I don’t give myself that third label or seek it out because there’s no benefit to it and nothing surrounding the issue would change.

[GhoatMonket]

Aug 5, 2024 11:23:51 GMT -6 newspapers said:

These updates! STP, treeofheaven, I hope everyone stays safe.

Rusty Red, I didn’t know you got engaged! Congrats!

McBenny
As someone who carries two dx and would likely qualify for a third were I to pursue it, I always ask what a late dx does for someone. Is it to qualify for treatment or get meds? Is it to make sense of childhood and/or current difficulties? I have been vocal here about my reservations regarding self dx, but I suppose if it helps people without access to diagnosing professionals understand themselves better, I can put the haterade back in the fridge for a bit. In my own case, I don’t give myself that third label or seek it out because there’s no benefit to it and nothing surrounding the issue would change.

They aren't using it as a means to understand themselves better. They are using as an excuse to be a sucky person.

[STP]

There is value in later in life dx as it helps to put past traumas into perspective. It can also help explain challenges you deal with in your daily life, and getting a handle on those things is necessary to live as the best version of yourself. As a mother especially, it's something I put a high premium on bc if I understand my impulses and limitations, I can do a better job working around them for my kids.

Also, as a woman in my early 40s, there is a great deal of life to live. A lot of it working. And understanding mental health and neurodivergence can only be an asset as I continue in my career.

And frankly, it's not as easy as people like to pretend to go to a professional these days. Wait lists are long, expense is crazy. Sometime doing your own research is the best you can manage. And I have found some invaluable tips that have made a HUGE difference, especially as I have moved into sobriety. Medication isn't always the desired outcome, sometimes it's just exercises and tools.

That being said, like anything else in life, your problems are not anyone else's. I cannot tell my boss "sorry I messed that up, I am pretty sure I have ADHD" or brush off my kid with a "well Mom has anxiety, so I can scream at you when I get overwhelmed, support me." If knowing this about yourself helps, that's awesome. I do find it helpful. But it is on me to fix it, and without burdening others during the process.

[jaygee]

STP 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

I so agree. Especially for women because we are so good at masking and hardly anyone suspected ADHD for girls in she 80s and 90s. Girls mask it by being adept at modeling appropriate social norms and fitting in. And then becoming perfectionists with anxiety problems. I’ve had several friends (of both genders) get later in life diagnosis that changed their lives for the positive because they could get help and stop gritting through life.

I don’t have ADHD formally diagnosed but I do believe it’s on a spectrum and now that I know so much more about it due to my kid, I have noticed some symptoms in myself. I don’t go around saying I have it but I am now aware of some tendencies I have (and they could really be symptoms of my other mental health issues) and try to use skills to minimize the impact on my life and my loved ones lives.

[jaygee]

I’m also doing a free 30 day anxiety course online and highly recommend it for anyone struggling with an anxiety disorder. I’ve been in therapy on and off for a long time for my disorder (diagnosed in my 30s but present since I was a kid) and am medicated and I’m learning some new info and skills in this course. The way the therapist explains things is just hitting for me.

The YouTube user is Therapy in a Nutshell and the course is called Breaking the Anxiety Cycle.

[chocolatecake]

It was wayyy past time but I just got rid of my thong underwear. They’ve been sitting in my drawer forever just in case but at this stage comfort comes first!

[chocolatecake]

While on vacation this summer, I forgot our beach bags. Instead of purchasing another, we hauled our extra stuff to the beach in paper grocery bags. I’m sure we looked kinda trashy but I didn’t care because I was on the beach in Hawaii!!

[pobre]

I love thongs and basically wear them exclusively.

I find them comfortable.

[piratecat]

Is this where we continue with confessions?

My husband's birthday was on Monday, and even though I had the whole week before to myself I managed to not really get presents or make any plans ahead of time. I racked my brain for ideas Sunday night into Monday morning and dragged my kids with me to pick up a present and beers and such (which, honestly, was probably my biggest gift to him, a few hours to himself at home).

What I really wanted to get him were a new pair of sunglasses, and I made a pair of cardboard sunglasses to give to him as an IOU and I was really proud of how they turned out and was disappointed that no one was quite as impressed as I would have expected.

[Yogurt]

I recently re purchased thongs. I was hating the bunching up that was happening with certain pants and VPL with others

[piratecat]

I've never worn thongs in my life.

[coolbeans]

Aug 9, 2024 8:42:52 GMT -6 pobre said:

I love thongs and basically wear them exclusively.

I find them comfortable.

100%. I find any underwear except thongs to be uncomfortable.

[coolbeans]

Skims thongs are the most comfortable underwear I have ever worn.

[icedcoffee]

Thongs and full underwear have their own time and place. I appreciate both