flojo
Sapphire
Posts: 3,378 Likes: 15,182
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Post by flojo on Jun 1, 2022 6:58:54 GMT -6
Sending you lots of love and support. Take it one day at a time.
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CeeBug
Opal
Posts: 8,071 Likes: 41,566
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Post by CeeBug on Jun 1, 2022 7:00:58 GMT -6
Sending love 💜💜
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senneth
Platinum
Posts: 1,294 Likes: 5,535
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Post by senneth on Jun 1, 2022 7:37:58 GMT -6
I’m so sorry.
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piratecat
Diamond
Posts: 35,999 Likes: 143,821
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Post by piratecat on Jun 1, 2022 7:40:23 GMT -6
I'm sorry, you've really been through it and you can't say you didn't try. I'm glad you have support from your family. Sending love to you and your kids through this.
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dc2london
Admin
Press Secretary
Posts: 61,607 Likes: 419,264
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Post by dc2london on Jun 1, 2022 9:11:08 GMT -6
I'm so sorry, FV
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loony
Emerald
Posts: 12,579 Likes: 45,000
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Post by loony on Jun 1, 2022 9:14:27 GMT -6
I'm so sorry he has failed you so spectacularly. You are a BAMF and we are here for you as you settle into your and your kids' new happiness.
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Ls2012
Amethyst
Posts: 7,364 Likes: 32,621
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Post by Ls2012 on Jun 1, 2022 9:16:38 GMT -6
I'm so sorry, flightview. You sound confident in your course of action and we're all here for you, supporting you from afar. Gentle hugs to you going forward.
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klw
Opal
Posts: 8,727 Likes: 21,484
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Post by klw on Jun 1, 2022 9:42:39 GMT -6
FlightView, I am so sorry. I am glad you have the family support if needed.
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sweetp
Sapphire
Posts: 2,775 Likes: 16,484
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Post by sweetp on Jun 1, 2022 9:45:01 GMT -6
I’m so sorry. I’m glad you’re able to say you tried and can now move forward! You’re a strong woman and he deserves nothing else from you.
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Post by kellykapow on Jun 1, 2022 10:29:47 GMT -6
I'm sorry you're dealing with this. But I am glad that now you can move forward with no regrets if you choose. You're a strong woman, and you got this.
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Post by angelashly on Jun 1, 2022 10:32:29 GMT -6
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FlightView
Sapphire
Resident Alaskan
Posts: 4,447 Likes: 18,208
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Post by FlightView on Jun 1, 2022 10:57:30 GMT -6
I’m still in shock I think. I have two family law attorneys to call and see if I like either of them. Then I’ll start the daunting task of taking pictures of everything in our house worth anything. So, when I confronted H with this, instead of apologizing or promising to be better (you know the usual conversation) H asked me to have an open mind and wanted to bring these two other women into our bedroom. Describing it as a fetish he apparently can’t control. And that I need to accept him for who he is. I was speechless. He told me he never felt comfortable talking to me about this and that’s why he hid it from me. But it was like, he wanted me to accept him as a serial cheater because it turned him on and also have threesomes with these two women he’s been talking to. This is about the 5th time I’ve caught him so I guess at least the approach is different. When I made it clear to him I’m no longer interested in even arguing about what happened he changed his tune real quick and told me I’d better get an attorney because he’s not paying child support. I was really hoping to just dissolve and move on but it looks like it’s going to get ugly.
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Post by angelashly on Jun 1, 2022 10:59:57 GMT -6
I am so sorry that he is going to make this ugly FlightView, but you gave him plenty of chances and it is not at all your fault. You can go through this divorce knowing you did everything you could and that you will be able to show your kids that. And he doesn't get a say about child support so good luck dude
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piratecat
Diamond
Posts: 35,999 Likes: 143,821
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Post by piratecat on Jun 1, 2022 11:02:17 GMT -6
FlightView, my gosh. And how in the world does he think he gets to just not pay child support?
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FlightView
Sapphire
Resident Alaskan
Posts: 4,447 Likes: 18,208
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Post by FlightView on Jun 1, 2022 11:06:40 GMT -6
FlightView, my gosh. And how in the world does he think he gets to just not pay child support? His line of thinking was because we’d both have the kids 50/50. That could work except he makes double what I do and he works out of town (I don’t actually know if him working out of town affects custody). But my dad wants to go after primary custody and alimony too. Though I haven’t told H that yet. I haven’t even told him I’m calling any attorneys yet.
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piratecat
Diamond
Posts: 35,999 Likes: 143,821
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Post by piratecat on Jun 1, 2022 11:11:00 GMT -6
FlightView , my gosh. And how in the world does he think he gets to just not pay child support? His line of thinking was because we’d both have the kids 50/50. That could work except he makes double what I do and he works out of town (I don’t actually know if him working out of town affects custody). But my dad wants to go after primary custody and alimony too. Though I haven’t told H that yet. I haven’t even told him I’m calling any attorneys yet. Is he even home half the year?
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FlightView
Sapphire
Resident Alaskan
Posts: 4,447 Likes: 18,208
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Post by FlightView on Jun 1, 2022 11:13:22 GMT -6
His line of thinking was because we’d both have the kids 50/50. That could work except he makes double what I do and he works out of town (I don’t actually know if him working out of town affects custody). But my dad wants to go after primary custody and alimony too. Though I haven’t told H that yet. I haven’t even told him I’m calling any attorneys yet. Is he even home half the year? Technically he’s supposed to be, but I know in my planner in 2020 he was only home 15 weeks because he was picking up extra weeks and that’s when he was seeing one of the house cleaners. I’d have to look back to last year.
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Sundae
Builder
Graphics Guru
Posts: 5,302 Likes: 25,293
Member is Online
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Post by Sundae on Jun 1, 2022 12:37:06 GMT -6
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Post by starrynight on Jun 1, 2022 13:22:26 GMT -6
I'm sorry, FlightView. I hope you like one of the attorneys and their guidance is helpful to you for these difficult next steps.
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Post by goldenbird on Jun 1, 2022 13:42:43 GMT -6
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Post by goldenbird on Jun 1, 2022 13:43:24 GMT -6
And LO fucking L to not wanting to pay child support. In what universe??
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Post by CestLaVie on Jun 1, 2022 13:55:56 GMT -6
And LO fucking L to not wanting to pay child support. In what universe?? this. The amount he is away he would be lucky to get 50/50 if he could even be around for 50/50, so that's even more child support. And the court doesn't gaf if you want to pay child support. Beep boop into the calculator and you get what you get. the audacity. but he fucked around and he will find out
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Post by angelashly on Jun 1, 2022 14:44:09 GMT -6
My mom and stepdad have 50/50 and he still pays her child support because she is still considered my sister's legal guardian and he makes more money
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brux
Diamond
Posts: 35,318 Likes: 282,326
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Post by brux on Jun 1, 2022 14:55:59 GMT -6
ok, fuck him.
Nope, no way no how does he get to dictate the financial terms of anything.
You get a lawyer.
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Post by downwarddog on Jun 1, 2022 15:43:45 GMT -6
Yeah, judges look real kindly on men that openly say "Hell no I'm not taking care of my kids financially" right off the bat. Lol
I'm sorry this went this way. I think you're doing the right thing and it's time. You will never have regrets looking back. You tried. Hugs
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caer
Sapphire
Posts: 4,575 Likes: 26,493
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Post by caer on Jun 1, 2022 16:07:22 GMT -6
I’m so sorry FlightView. I hope you get a kickass lawyer who gets every cent he owes you guys. Sending love and strength your way.
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Post by summerbabe on Jun 1, 2022 16:12:38 GMT -6
A close family member works in child support (different state) but so many people are like I don't want to pay. It literally never works out that way. Luckily his bs will not always be your problem. Your dad is awesome.
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iruntodrink
Sapphire
Mostly namaste. A little bit fuck you.
Posts: 4,579 Likes: 22,616
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Post by iruntodrink on Jun 1, 2022 16:38:35 GMT -6
Just here to give virtual hugs ❤️🩹
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Pizzaslut
Ruby
*it’s a joke. get some hobbies.
Posts: 22,727 Likes: 131,010
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Post by Pizzaslut on Jun 1, 2022 16:40:55 GMT -6
First of all, I am so sorry friend. You put so much into this and you have every right to be done,
Second of all, fuck him.
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sterling
Global Moderator
GD
Posts: 15,040 Likes: 130,258
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Post by sterling on Jun 1, 2022 16:57:24 GMT -6
A lot of people say things they won’t ever do. Courts disagree. Fuck him.
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