tgrimes
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Post by tgrimes on Apr 2, 2019 12:30:12 GMT -6
I had a lot of fun with my MIL last night. We had a few martinis with our sushi & since it was happy hour our entire bill was only $50! Then we walked across the street to the theater. My old dance director from OU is now the Dean of the College of Fine Arts and she caught me while we were finding our seats. I got to chat with her for 10 minutes and it really made me miss the dance world. At intermission I bought us drinks while my MIL went to the restroom. I sat my stuff down on a cocktail table next to an old guy taking pictures and politely asked him not to catch any of me drinking alcohol. We started talking and it turns out he's the director of the school of music. So when my MIL finds me I introduce her. He was very nice and provided us with some faculty gossip. Now my MIL thinks I'm really well connected at OU since I introduced her to the Dean and one of the directors. Lol.
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Post by sarahwithanh on Apr 2, 2019 12:37:23 GMT -6
sophiegrace I'm so sorry your going through that. Fx you make it to 36 weeks. My SIL is 28w4d. She has been on bed rest in the hospital since 25 weeks when she started bleeding. He water broke last week. Luckily she is stable but we are in the every day you stay pregnant is great stage. They won't let her go past 34 weeks. It's been very stressful and I wish I could help her. Anyways no babies for either of you for at least 5 more weeks. danib I'm so sorry about your MIL. Sending love to all of you. Monty and I had a chill morning if relaxing and running to the store. I needed it. Swimming lessons this afternoon though and not looking forward to it. I will say last week he actually kicked for the first time. I've been debating stopping because as with all things the progress is painfully slow and it's $$. Plus we have been sick so much that we have 4 or 5 makeups but no time to do it. Anyway I have missed you ladies. I have been debating explaining my absence but have just not been in a good headspace. I'm seeing someone and I think it's helping. It's just a lot and I've been withdrawing from all relationships. Know that I care about you all a ton. I'm trying really hard to do better.
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tgrimes
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Post by tgrimes on Apr 2, 2019 12:40:58 GMT -6
M & I went to Kindergarten roundup this morning. It...was intense. I'm so glad one of the moms has an older son already there so she could give me insider information.
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tgrimes
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Post by tgrimes on Apr 2, 2019 12:43:56 GMT -6
sarahwithanh Thanks for checking in. We miss you and were wondering where you've been. I hope seeing someone helps and please know that we're hear for you, no matter what you need. Even if it's just to share a cute pic or video of Monty.
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waitwhat
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Post by waitwhat on Apr 2, 2019 13:31:05 GMT -6
Glad you had fun tgrimes! I love the relationship you have with your MIL. We’ve missed you sarahwithanh! Pop in when you can. We are here for you!
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tgrimes
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Post by tgrimes on Apr 2, 2019 13:34:10 GMT -6
waitwhat I can't believe she still likes to do things with me after that time I threw up in her car after the Hans Zimmer concert we went to...
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starbuck
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Post by starbuck on Apr 2, 2019 17:48:33 GMT -6
Someone please teach W how to wipe his own ass. Been trying for literal years and at this point it's clear I'm not capable.
And without going into too much detail I literally had to clean the entire toilet after he went to the bathroom alone while I was putting K to bed. He somehow got shit all over it. And obviously there was an underwear change because he'd already left the bathroom thinking he was done cleaning up and he was so not done.
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Post by sarahwithanh on Apr 2, 2019 18:01:49 GMT -6
Someone please teach W how to wipe his own ass. Been trying for literal years and at this point it's clear I'm not capable. And without going into too much detail I literally had to clean the entire toilet after he went to the bathroom alone while I was putting K to bed. He somehow got shit all over it. And obviously there was an underwear change because he'd already left the bathroom thinking he was done cleaning up and he was so not done. Some people swear by making them clean it up and have you tried wet wipes? Otherwise I'm not a potty train expert and this sounds not fun.
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starbuck
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Post by starbuck on Apr 2, 2019 18:09:27 GMT -6
Someone please teach W how to wipe his own ass. Been trying for literal years and at this point it's clear I'm not capable. And without going into too much detail I literally had to clean the entire toilet after he went to the bathroom alone while I was putting K to bed. He somehow got shit all over it. And obviously there was an underwear change because he'd already left the bathroom thinking he was done cleaning up and he was so not done. Some people swear by making them clean it up and have you tried wet wipes? Otherwise I'm not a potty train expert and this sounds not fun. Next time he's cleaning it up 100000% yes. lol Usually I come behind with wet wipes but maybe I should get him to try that himself. He more smears it than actually cleans it. yay
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kleigh
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Post by kleigh on Apr 2, 2019 19:03:31 GMT -6
waitwhat I can't believe she still likes to do things with me after that time I threw up in her car after the Hans Zimmer concert we went to... OMFG 🤣🤣
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hangry
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Post by hangry on Apr 2, 2019 19:13:03 GMT -6
sophiegrace is there anything you can do to help this? It doesn’t sound like a bed rest kind of thing. Stay put baby! sarahwithanh I didn’t know someone’s water could break and then stay pregnant for several more weeks! Wishing your SIL all the best! Also, really glad to hear you’re takin care of yourself. I’m the same way and tend to keep my struggles in instead of share them but we are here to listen if you want to share. kleigh O has asthma and only occasionally had wheezing. He has his own inhaler and spacer and uses it just fine. He has a rescue inhaler and a regular one. Whenever he has a flair up, we are supposed to start him on the regular one 2x/day and use the rescue one up to every 4 hours as needed. I don’t think your pedi would be concerned with you medicating because aren’t the doses the same? danib I am sorry to hear about your MIL. Cancer sucks. tgrimes is there any capacity in which you could get back into the dance world?
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hangry
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Post by hangry on Apr 2, 2019 19:16:49 GMT -6
Also, starbuck, I am in the same world. I still clean O’s butt when we are at home and expect to see dirty underwear on days he goes at school. A few weeks back I found half the roll of TP rolled up in the toilet yet he was still not clean. We had a stern talking about clogging the toilet. I’m very paranoid of that for some reason. Today, O told me his arms aren’t long enough to clean. All I said was, oh really?
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Post by sarahwithanh on Apr 2, 2019 19:18:35 GMT -6
hangry not ideal. The risk of infection is a problem but the baby is at greater risk until 34 weeks which is why they are trying to wait. They have given her two rounds of steroids for the baby's lungs and two rounds of magnesium to stop labor. They monitor really closely and if they stay stable they can wait but it's a day to day thing. She will get more magnesium and antibiotics before baby comes. Baby is also breach so anticipating a csection. They are just hoping that they avoid an emergency one.
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tgrimes
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Post by tgrimes on Apr 2, 2019 19:45:45 GMT -6
Re: ass wiping
M just recently started to wipe herself. We had to make a deal that she would try wiping first and then I’d double check. We also had 8543896 talks about wiping a few times, then flushing the toilet.
It’s been a process. Most people in N13 still complain about wiping.
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tgrimes
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Post by tgrimes on Apr 2, 2019 19:47:12 GMT -6
tgrimes is there any capacity in which you could get back into the dance world? Yes...when I win the lottery. 😉
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Post by jubilantsquirrel on Apr 2, 2019 20:14:38 GMT -6
Some people swear by making them clean it up and have you tried wet wipes? Otherwise I'm not a potty train expert and this sounds not fun. Next time he's cleaning it up 100000% yes. lol Usually I come behind with wet wipes but maybe I should get him to try that himself. He more smears it than actually cleans it. yay We started with wet wipes for DS1. He now does a pretty decent job of wiping himself, although we still double check his handy work. But he gets himself pretty clean!
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Post by sarahwithanh on Apr 2, 2019 22:22:42 GMT -6
Speaking of pooping M is doing this lovely thing where he scratches his butt every time I try to change a poopy diaper. I don't always get his hand right away either. It's so gross and driving me insane.
Also terrified it's going to turn into a playing with poop thing which is common with kids who have DS. Please dear God let me not have that problem with him.
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Post by jubilantsquirrel on Apr 2, 2019 22:26:41 GMT -6
Have I told toy guys that we stopped with nighttime pullups for DS1 on his 5th birthday? He had been waking up dry for probably close to a year now, but anytime we brought up wearing underwear to bed he would get really anxious. So we talked to him for a bit leading up to his birthday and told him that since he's 5 now and he doesn't have accidents in his pullups at night, that it time to wear undies to bed.
He fought it hard the first night. He cried and cried and cried. Second night was only a tad better, but now he doesn't care at all and he hasn't had a single accident!
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waitwhat
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Post by waitwhat on Apr 3, 2019 4:35:17 GMT -6
Have I told toy guys that we stopped with nighttime pullups for DS1 on his 5th birthday? He had been waking up dry for probably close to a year now, but anytime we brought up wearing underwear to bed he would get really anxious. So we talked to him for a bit leading up to his birthday and told him that since he's 5 now and he doesn't have accidents in his pullups at night, that it time to wear undies to bed. He fought it hard the first night. He cried and cried and cried. Second night was only a tad better, but now he doesn't care at all and he hasn't had a single accident! That’s awesome! Go J! I was just thinking last night I have no clue how to start night training. B wakes up with such a full diaper so I don’t think he’s anywhere near ready yet and be never leaves his room MOTN to get up and use the bathroom. I have no clue where to even start but maybe I just need to wait until he’s more ready.
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tgrimes
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Post by tgrimes on Apr 3, 2019 8:10:56 GMT -6
Have I told toy guys that we stopped with nighttime pullups for DS1 on his 5th birthday? He had been waking up dry for probably close to a year now, but anytime we brought up wearing underwear to bed he would get really anxious. So we talked to him for a bit leading up to his birthday and told him that since he's 5 now and he doesn't have accidents in his pullups at night, that it time to wear undies to bed. He fought it hard the first night. He cried and cried and cried. Second night was only a tad better, but now he doesn't care at all and he hasn't had a single accident! Awesome!
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Post by cookswithwine on Apr 3, 2019 8:19:50 GMT -6
For potty training, did y’all find the 3 day “boot camp style” (my wording) worked best? Stay home for 3 days, let him run around naked or in undies and pump him full of juice? I’m getting very close to taking it more seriously. I would like him out of day time diapers by August. He will sit on the potty at home and at school but rarely goes (like only 3x).
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Post by goldenlove on Apr 3, 2019 8:21:40 GMT -6
My gosh work is frustrating today. I'm already getting into a senioritis type mood knowing I won't be the one to deal with some of this stuff when I'm on maternity leave. But I'm trying not to be an asshole and actually get things in a good spot. Things have just been such a mess.
H and I have been discussing what I should do next. If I'm really planning on leaving, there is no point in going past the short term disability portion of my leave since the FMLA part is unpaid anyway. Unless I want to come back and then leave again.. I dunno. It's a lot to think about.
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Post by goldenlove on Apr 3, 2019 8:23:14 GMT -6
I don't even know what to do about potty training. C still has zero interest. Actually he probably has negative interest. If I ask him about sitting on the potty, he gets mad. He hates the big toilet and the little toddler ones.
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waitwhat
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Post by waitwhat on Apr 3, 2019 8:32:28 GMT -6
For potty training, did y’all find the 3 day “boot camp style” (my wording) worked best? Stay home for 3 days, let him run around naked or in undies and pump him full of juice? I’m getting very close to taking it more seriously. I would like him out of day time diapers by August. He will sit on the potty at home and at school but rarely goes (like only 3x). I tried that at first. And let me tell you it was exhausting. I literally sat in my house all day with him sitting on the potty with the iPad. I fed him a ton of water, bribed him with skittles, moved the potty into the bathroom, the living room, the play room (for privacy) but that method never worked for me. I discovered that my kid could hold his bladder for hours. He would literally wait until I put him in a diaper for naptime and just unleash his pee. I waited a few more months and then really went for it. I ditched the little potty and just used a ring, I set a timer on my phone for every 20 min and made the biggest deal when it went off that it was potty time! He got excited and eventually it clicked. It took maybe 2 full days and he was trained. I realIze every kid is different but this is what worked for us!
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starbuck
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Post by starbuck on Apr 3, 2019 8:53:00 GMT -6
cookswithwine, daycare just asked us to send the twins in with underwear so we are letting them start. We need to do better about getting them to go on the weekend and after school. I assume I need to buy some MnM's for bribery. Basically I'm letting them do most of the work.
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Post by cookswithwine on Apr 3, 2019 9:16:35 GMT -6
cookswithwine, daycare just asked us to send the twins in with underwear so we are letting them start. We need to do better about getting them to go on the weekend and after school. I assume I need to buy some MnM's for bribery. Basically I'm letting them do most of the work. This was my plan! But he’s been “trying” since Nov at school and I see no improvement.
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tgrimes
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Post by tgrimes on Apr 3, 2019 9:26:38 GMT -6
cookswithwine H has been in underwear for a few weeks now. The 1st day was not delightful. I put him in underwear and nothing else, set a timer on my phone and took him every hour. If he went potty, he'd get M&Ms. Sometimes he'd make it the whole hour and sometimes he'd have an accident at the 50 min mark. We've had several days where he didn't have any accidents. Some he'd just have 1. Sunday he was trolling me and had 8 before 10am. Hence my potty training martini at 11am. He just wouldn't get all the pee out when he'd sit on the potty. What everyone at daycare tells me is once you start, do not go back to diapers/pullups. It just makes it more confusing. I put him in a pullup at night and at nap, but he doesn't wear them for naps at school. Now M was completely different. I put her in panties and she had 3 accidents the first day and that was it. She hated to be wet. H doesn't give a shit. Some of it is probably because he still isn't very verbal. I have to watch him for grunting noises and run him to the potty to poop. He did tell MH that he needed to poop while he was in the bath the other night though and then he pooped on the potty.
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danib
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Post by danib on Apr 3, 2019 9:31:30 GMT -6
cookswithwine I tried a few times with C using pullups and it was a huge failure. I waited a bit and then one day (when I knew we'd have a few uninterrupted days at home) I made a big deal about getting him some big boy underwear, and for the next 2 days I had him sitting on the toilet pretty much every 20 minutes or so. Anytime he peed in the toilet I made a huge deal about it. Accidents I didn't make a big deal about, just cleaned it up and said something like "oh no. We'll try again". After the second day he pretty much had it. For a few days I'd ask him to go sit on the toilet if I knew he hadn't gone in a while, but he was mostly doing it on his own then. H is nowhere near interested yet. He pees in the toilet if he's in the mood but mostly says no. I'll eventually do the same "method". Pronably this summer.
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starbuck
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Post by starbuck on Apr 3, 2019 9:31:54 GMT -6
cookswithwine, daycare just asked us to send the twins in with underwear so we are letting them start. We need to do better about getting them to go on the weekend and after school. I assume I need to buy some MnM's for bribery. Basically I'm letting them do most of the work. This was my plan! But he’s been “trying” since Nov at school and I see no improvement. Aw man. That sucks. I wish you godspeed. Hopefully you can get himnom board quickly.
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Post by sarahwithanh on Apr 3, 2019 10:25:05 GMT -6
So I went to a potty training seminar. She is an expert in kids with shown syndrome specifically so keep that in mind here because alone of her commentary is based on low tone and intellectual disability factors
She definitely said that if you put them in underwear you cannot go back so if you are unsure if they are ready she suggests a naked trial. She also said pull-ups are an in between option. She overally emphasized no undies until you are committed.
She also mentioned that pull-ups are basically diapers. Both are moisture wicking and can hinder potty training. Interestingly she said cloth diapers help because they feel wet. Who knows?
She only does boot camp method. A key part to her potty training is making them drink a shit ton of water. With be Down syndrome this is critical because of low tone but in general the idea is you need them to really feel the sensation of needing to pee. If they don't feel the need to pee they won't be able chose to go on their own.
The part that is really unique to get method and I'm Leary about is the accident protocol. She always puts them on the potty when they have an accident and then She makes them clean it up. She wants it to be super unpleasant when they don't go on the potty. She does rewards too. She had a small area gated off by the bathroom that they stayed in. In that area she had 3 items, neutral toy, medium interest, and high interest. The high interest is of they initiate after an accident. She even set up a table and eats in the sectioned off area. She doesn't do poop or nap/nighttime potty training at the same time. I have her manual and a DVD of her presentation to brush up on. It was intense.
She is against the timer method because then they aren't learning their own body signals. I feel like with neurotypical kiddos that isn't as big of an issue though. If verbally asking looking up the sign for potty or a visual potty schedule. Super easy to use.
M is showing interest and had peed and pooped in the potty but he isn't mobile enough or verbal so I'm not sure what to do. He also is no where near able to pull off his own clothes. We are working on signing it and picture schedules but that part is hard. He also gives no shits about being dirty or wet. Potty expert last suggest 3 years old for potty training.
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