Halloween Eve

[guster]

We have a preschool costume party for Halloween tomorrow. It’s family party so no classes. I’m dressing the kids in last year’s costumes (thank goodness they fit)
Trick-or-treating in this town is pretty limited to a few streets because of how spread out everything is. The next town over has a trunk or treat on the town green. It’s supposed to be terrific – decorated cars, storeftonts, they’re doing a thriller flash mob at 6:30, and it all ends by 7:30 so the bigger kids can still go out and go house to house.
We’ll come back to here after, but stop at both neighbors’ houses first.
I doubt we will ever have a trick-or-treater. Our driveway is pretty long, but just in case, i bought a couple of bags of candy.

[jewels]

I am often alone with both kids. I won't bring B to a party for S unless I have checked with the hosts first. And I only do that with the families I know. And then I make sure to increase what I spend on the gift since I know they are probably paying per head. But most of the time I'll either decline the party or ask my parents to come watch B while we go.

This is for parties at a play place which is what a majority of the families at DC do. For "house" parties I would assume he's included, but I would still mention it when RSVPing.

However, for S party next month, I told most of the families I know to bring their siblings as well. For some of them it's b/c their siblings are in B's class so they can play together. For one, I know her H is a cop and works most weekends so I wouldn't want them to have to miss out b/c she can't bring his 2 siblings.

We are lucky that I am not too concerned with the budget - extra kids are $10 per head at this place so we can afford to be generous. But I know everyone isn't always in that position.

[guster]

joelies, why aren’t there streetlights? And why didn’t I think to look at something so simple before we moved?!?

[trtlcrzy]

Oct 30, 2018 13:22:12 GMT -6 dapostrophe said:

Re: Bringing extra people to a party, I can certainly see why it would be considered tacky, but that would not be how I saw it. In my world, my Grandma will send a text to ask if she can stop by at 2 and then her and two of my aunties will come by at 11:30 while I'm still cleaning my house. If I invite one person to a party or a dinner, I assume it could be them, maybe their spouse, all their kids, their kids friend who is staying the night and anyone they thought to invite that knows me. This is typically my family and close friends who do this, but it becoming known around my neighborhood as well. Bring your kids, your brother's kids...whomever. This would obviously probably be different if I had a pay-per-head situation or like really limited space somewhere, but we don't typically do those types of parties.

I'm much more annoyed when people cancel, even when it's for a good reason, than I would be for having too many people. I think it's cultural. In my family, it would be considered very rude to cancel a loved one's event unless you were on your death bed. If you tried a "I'm just going to stay in tonight, we had a long week" at the last minute, you would get your ass chewed out and someone would be coming by to pick you up.

I definitely think it depends on how well you know the person and the situation. You have mentioned close friends and family. But for classmate’s families that you don’t know do you feel the same way?

[cagoldi]

Dude has been enjoying Creative Galaxy lately. Yesterday, he asked me if I was an artist (I am the very furthest thing from it).

Then I went to a paint party last night with my SM, cousins, and aunts and brought back my painting.

Dude is convinced it's a masterpiece and he didn't want to set it down at all. He said I'm so talented from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet LOL.

[trtlcrzy]

Oct 30, 2018 13:42:44 GMT -6 guster said:

joelies, why aren’t there streetlights? And why didn’t I think to look at something so simple before we moved?!?

You could purchase a decorative lamp post (or a pair) to put at the end of your driveway.

[guster]

Oct 30, 2018 13:47:41 GMT -6 trtlcrzy said:

Oct 30, 2018 13:42:44 GMT -6 guster said:

joelies, why aren’t there streetlights? And why didn’t I think to look at something so simple before we moved?!?

You could purchase a decorative lamp post (or a pair) to put at the end of your driveway.

We do have one at the top of our driveway and obviously the spotlights for the front and back of the house, but the roads have nothing. Zero! If you’re driving at anytime in the dark, it’s a white-knuckled adventure

[trtlcrzy]

Oct 30, 2018 13:55:27 GMT -6 guster said:

Oct 30, 2018 13:47:41 GMT -6 trtlcrzy said:

You could purchase a decorative lamp post (or a pair) to put at the end of your driveway.

We do have one at the top of our driveway and obviously the spotlights for the front and back of the house, but the roads have nothing. Zero! If you’re driving at anytime in the dark, it’s a white-knuckled adventure

Are you actually “in town” or are you rural?

[guster]

trtlcrzy, it’s one in the same here.
It’s usually referred to as an exurban community, but there are some parts of the town that are more farmland.

[guster]

Did anyone see that Hillary Duff had a baby girl that she named Banks?

[trtlcrzy]

Oct 30, 2018 14:00:34 GMT -6 guster said:

trtlcrzy, it’s one in the same here.
It’s usually referred to as an exurban community, but there are some parts of the town that are more farmland.

Interesting. I have never been to New England so my understanding of the area is from tv shows and movies. I picture quaint little town squares with lots of beautiful old houses. Like on Gilmore girls, lol.

[tgrimes]

Oct 30, 2018 14:05:20 GMT -6 guster said:

Did anyone see that Hillary Duff had a baby girl that she named Banks?

Yes.  I'm not a fan of that name.

[guster]

Oct 30, 2018 14:10:25 GMT -6 trtlcrzy said:

Oct 30, 2018 14:00:34 GMT -6 guster said:

trtlcrzy, it’s one in the same here.
It’s usually referred to as an exurban community, but there are some parts of the town that are more farmland.

Interesting. I have never been to New England so my understanding of the area is from tv shows and movies. I picture quaint little town squares with lots of beautiful old houses. Like on Gilmore girls, lol.

It’s not too far from it. The two towns around us have a more downtown-like feel. We’re super tiny so we have a library, a post office, two restaurants, and a tiny grocery store, but no one would call it a downtown,

[guster]

Oct 30, 2018 14:13:47 GMT -6 tgrimes said:

Oct 30, 2018 14:05:20 GMT -6 guster said:

Did anyone see that Hillary Duff had a baby girl that she named Banks?

Yes.  I'm not a fan of that name.

Nope.

[inthekitty]

Oct 30, 2018 13:44:59 GMT -6 trtlcrzy said:

Oct 30, 2018 13:22:12 GMT -6 dapostrophe said:

Re: Bringing extra people to a party, I can certainly see why it would be considered tacky, but that would not be how I saw it. In my world, my Grandma will send a text to ask if she can stop by at 2 and then her and two of my aunties will come by at 11:30 while I'm still cleaning my house. If I invite one person to a party or a dinner, I assume it could be them, maybe their spouse, all their kids, their kids friend who is staying the night and anyone they thought to invite that knows me. This is typically my family and close friends who do this, but it becoming known around my neighborhood as well. Bring your kids, your brother's kids...whomever. This would obviously probably be different if I had a pay-per-head situation or like really limited space somewhere, but we don't typically do those types of parties.

I'm much more annoyed when people cancel, even when it's for a good reason, than I would be for having too many people. I think it's cultural. In my family, it would be considered very rude to cancel a loved one's event unless you were on your death bed. If you tried a "I'm just going to stay in tonight, we had a long week" at the last minute, you would get your ass chewed out and someone would be coming by to pick you up.

I definitely think it depends on how well you know the person and the situation. You have mentioned close friends and family. But for classmate’s families that you don’t know do you feel the same way?

This. In general I don't mind an extra sibling or two. I bring both of my girls to birthday parties but check in advance and/or keep the other kid with me and pay for her. If I know the whole family the more the merrier, but in this case it was just a classmate's family.

[dapostrophe]

Oct 30, 2018 13:44:59 GMT -6 trtlcrzy said:

I definitely think it depends on how well you know the person and the situation. You have mentioned close friends and family. But for classmate’s families that you don’t know do you feel the same way?

Yeah, I would. I get that this is me thing and unique to my abnormally large family, but I think I set up parties around expecting lots of extra people rather than picking a place based on the head count. Also, I mix classmates and neighbors or families with multiple kids that happen to be around my kids ages.

Like the other day we had a classmate Dad that we don't know come to drop off his kid at our party, and take his younger kid somewhere else for a few hours. We handed him a drink and sent the younger kid off to play before he had even gotten all the way in the door. I don't know that if he would have just come in on his own and made himself and his kid comfortable, that I would have even noticed. I would have assumed one of my friends or neighbors had welcomed him in, if that makes sense. 

[inthekitty]

How awful of you to go into other neighborhoods to ToT joelies! J/k. I think it's nuts when people go crazy about strong ToT feels including people ToT in other neighborhoods. It's nice C gets to ToT in his buddy's neighborhood.

[dapostrophe]

+1 on looking forward to neighborhood trick or treating. My neighbors are festive (and drinkers)!

[inthekitty]

Oct 30, 2018 14:53:19 GMT -6 mamabear said:

Oct 30, 2018 14:26:03 GMT -6 inthekitty said:

How awful of you to go into other neighborhoods to ToT joelies ! J/k. I think it's nuts when people go crazy about strong ToT feels including people ToT in other neighborhoods. It's nice C gets to ToT in his buddy's neighborhood.

Agreed! Wasn't there a story on this last year about a neighborhood refusing to give candy to kids from other areas? 🤦‍♀️

It's seems like there's some nutty story every year. A town in my state is trying to make it illegal (wtf?) to ToT if you're over 12.  So...would you rather have 13 yos out drinking and getting in trouble or ToT? How hard is it to turn off your porch light if you have to resort to getting nutty about who gets candy. I will always side eye the parents collecting candy for their 8 mo but I'll still give them some.

[flamingo]

Oct 30, 2018 14:20:59 GMT -6 inthekitty said:

Oct 30, 2018 13:44:59 GMT -6 trtlcrzy said:

I definitely think it depends on how well you know the person and the situation. You have mentioned close friends and family. But for classmate’s families that you don’t know do you feel the same way?

This. In general I don't mind an extra sibling or two. I bring both of my girls to birthday parties but check in advance and/or keep the other kid with me and pay for her. If I know the whole family the more the merrier, but in this case it was just a classmate's family.

Right. And I see a big difference b/n a house or park party (sure, typically the more the merrier!), vs a location where you’re paying per kid. Someone bringing several siblings could add up really quickly.

Similarly... I looked at one place for B that included pony rides, and you reserve the # of horses based on guest count. So if a bunch of extra guests show up, now the birthday kid and his/her ACTUAL guests get less time/rides/whatever.

[xolastunicornxo]

Hi!!! Just popping in to say hi!! Last week was crazy, and this week is also crazy and I’m trying to catch up on everything from
Last week, lol. Lucas’s party was great. Rylands bday is Saturday and I have done nothing except buy a box of cake mix.

I’m super excited for tomorrow. I was pregnant last year, so it wasn’t as much fun. We go i our neighborhood with a group of about 5 friends and all the kids. We load up a wagon with a cooler and roadies and it’s so fun. Our neighborhood is pretty into it. We have like two houses that do haunted houses each year, a few houses that hand out Jell-O shots to the adults, and a guy that always sets up his grill and hands out hotdogs.

[chrisy01]

I would rather give a teenager candy who is tot properly (costume etc) then a teenager causing mayhem and whatnot.

[peachsmama]

I'm generally breezy about bringing more people to parties. One of our friends has 4 adoptive kids and their house is still "open" so they often have fosters in their care. She tried to RSVP no because of that the first party I invited them to and I'm like um you're these kids lifeline, bring them to a fun party.

Now my cousin showed up to our pumpkin patch party as we were loading the car and everyone was gone just because she wanted me to pay admission for her family. That pissed me off. I dont care to pay for you but you better be part of the party and actually celebrate my kid.

[peachsmama]

We live in the country so we go to the nice neighborhood near us. They're big 1 acre lots and no street lights but everyone sets up at the end of their drive ways and always have fun stuff and decorations. Its fun. This year I'm taking the wagon. We ended up carrying thr boys last year and about died walking up the hill to our car lol.

[chrisy01]

We go to a neighborhood that we pass everyday that goes all out. LO calls the main one the spooky house because they have a new theme each year with a walkthrough. They scare the older kids but are nice to the little kids

[yummeecookee]

All the ToT talk is reminding me that I desperately need to buy more candy. Yes, I’m that person that waited until the last minute. 😖

Last year we had a little fire pit going w a few of the neighbors and enjoyed some adult libations. I am hoping for the same this year. 🍻

[mskatiep]

We never seem to ToT in our own neighborhood. This year we are going to my sister's (huge neighborhood, lots of young kids) and last year we went with one of my other sisters in my hometown 2 hrs away (I was on a work trip that happened to coincide with Halloween, so Layla came with and stayed at my mom's.)

My neighborhood is pretty dull, so I doubt it will even get any ToTing kids.

[klong11]

peachsmama please tell me you didn't pay for her.

[klong11]

Team don't give TOT an age limit. There are some special needs kids that continue past the "appropriate" age.

Plus, it's just candy, no one is hurting anyone, just let them TOT. It's better than them egging your house.

[klong11]

My recently divorced friend/coworker is driving me crazy. She told me she stopped taking her meds(without talking to her Dr first) and I honestly think she needs back on. I'm getting constant texts about do I think her ex is seeing anyone and how she has spent the last two days crying.....um, yeah.
I get that she's going through a lot, but seriously, I have a life. I was at Cadence's dance class tonight and she flipped out that I wasn't texting her back.
Back off!!!!