Randoms - Week of Oct. 22nd!

[codex320]

Taitai, i hope it isn't as bad as it sounds!!

[curmudgeon]

It seems my kid constantly has food in his hand. Time to make dinner? Here’s a yogurt or fruit bar. Out to eat and waiting for food? Here’s some Cheerios. Stroll through target? How about a banana. I think daycare technically has 2 snack times but since most of the kids are under 1 they are all on their own schedules, and DS wants to eat anytime he sees another kid with food. So I pack a lot of food.

[danvers]

Oct 30, 2018 17:09:00 GMT -6 curmudgeon said:

It seems my kid constantly has food in his hand. Time to make dinner? Here’s a yogurt or fruit bar. Out to eat and waiting for food? Here’s some Cheerios. Stroll through target? How about a banana. I think daycare technically has 2 snack times but since most of the kids are under 1 they are all on their own schedules, and DS wants to eat anytime he sees another kid with food. So I pack a lot of food.

This is also my kid. 👆

[Taitai]

Oct 30, 2018 10:51:27 GMT -6 codex320 said:

Taitai, i hope it isn't as bad as it sounds!!

Ummmm....it’s not good. The kid woke up at 4am this morning and started opening doors into our room and DS1’s room!!! I was like - where TF are your parents and why are they letting you run around our house unsupervised at 4am!?!?

The mom says they have no rules at their house...and no bedtimes. The kid has been up since 4am...it’s now 10:30am and he won’t nap. He just wants to constantly guzzle milk - I bet that is how he keeps his energy up on so little sleep. He has tried to color on our walls, climb on top of our $$$ air purifiers, climb our curtains, and he’s broken 2 of DS1’s toys. He also has a cold and is constantly coughing and getting snot everywhere. He “doesn’t like his nose wiped,” so he is just a walking mucus spreading machine. 😩

I am going to have a nice chat with my friend and explain that in our house, we have rules and we like sleep. We also expect kids to be supervised. Hopefully that does something. First 20 hours are not going well... 😅😭😩




ETA - this is taitai - I’m in costume for the blinds thread Halloween. 🎃👻

[duskymonkey]

Oct 28, 2018 2:31:21 GMT -6 Taitai said:

duskymonkey Glad to hear you are all feeling better! Yes - I do have a helper here, but it’s Sunday, so she’s off today. I couldn’t stand the crumbs everywhere, so I just vacuumed myself. I’m sure I missed stuff and she’ll do the floors on Monday, but at least I know we’re not tracking stuff all over the place today!

You’re right about being able to get help in a Southeast Asia. I’ve gotten so used to it that I’m terrified of moving back to the states some day and doing everything on my own! 😁😂😭😩

I am like super confused.@tatitai did you change your SN? 
ETA I just saw your post above this one   Now I not confused

[duskymonkey]

Oct 30, 2018 3:01:42 GMT -6 Taitai said:

Our house guests from the USA arrived today! It’s so nice to see them - I am really good friends with the mom, and DH gets along great with the dad. Their almost 2 year old is super cute too!

But....I found out today that their kid doesn’t go to bed until 11pm. Yes - 11pm. He wakes up at 7am and naps from noon to 2pm most days...but sometimes skips his nap. 😮 He also doesn’t eat at the table ever, and runs all over the place spreading his food everywhere....every.single.meal.and.snack.time 😦

I’m a little scared....our kids are in bed/crib by 7:30pm each night and they are only allowed to snack or eat at the table- no exceptions. I hope the white noise machines can tune out their 2 yo running around until 11pm! 😬 🤞🤞

Also, they have no timetable for when they will leave. Maybe a few weeks. I guess we’ll see how it goes?

OMG! Are they masochists? Seriously I mean why for the love of god WHY!
I don't get it...they didn't purchase a RT ticket?
Also no just no to the eating everywhere deal. We eat at the dining table and no where else - ok when we have a special movie time and have popcorn but still.

[duskymonkey]

Taitai, hopefully your chat will be cordially received. I am sorry but I am eye rolling at your house guest. I expect my kid to behave even at my sister's house and that includes asking for permission before touching anything - basically don't touch anything unless I say so. I've managed to teach him to keep his hands to himself where ever he goes - doesn't work all the time but works satisfactorily. I do EXPECT my kid to be on his best behavior outside the house. no exceptions. I get it 2 yr old is hard but keeping a strict supervision on them is your duty as a parent as well as teaching them manners. I also really really do not get the late night bed time...I mean no just no. Even now at age 4 once DS is in his room for bedtime, he knows he isn't allowed to run out until the next morning - we still use the monitor so if he needs something he'll call out. Not for nothing, they sound like SEA parents.

[duskymonkey]

cythe agree with danvers about outings and Halloween is one of those not really appropriate for babies although the nursing mom's group last year had a halloween "party" for the babies and moms and that was fun to see the babies in costumes. Also I wouldn't worry much about feeling like E would miss out - she won't and like you said, she doesn't care and won't remember. We started taking DS out when he hit 2 years old. We also don't snack here. I find it difficult to include a snack time when they're still napping 2x a day - there just isn't enojght time between meals and for us I did notice meals times would be more difficult too. Basically like you, milk is lil fella's snack time. I wouldn't worry about it too much...trust me they'll be wanting snacks and asking for it soon enough.

[duskymonkey]

cougarette congratulations! on your new home. Hopefully you'll be able to find a buyer soon for the current home. Also glad to see you back even for a post or 2.

[danvers]

Every year I know people are changing their names for Halloweennor April Fools or whatever because I’m a super lurker.... and every year I’m taken by surprise. Like, I logged on and you all are engaging with Taitai and I’m like “man they are all so nice to whoever those Cavilliocious person is and it appears this poster has been posting awhile. What an a-hole I am for ignoring them...” 😑😆😑

Anyway, I can’t wait to hear how this houseguest situation goes Taitai

[danvers]

Also, our town moved truck or treating to Friday due to a forecasts of rain tonight. Fine by me because I wouldn’t have taken the girls anyway in the rain.

However I did “back in my day” to my students about trick or treating regardless of rain, snow, or sunshine and they were horrified that we had to endure whatever conditions occured on October 31st 😂

[cythe]

Taitai shut that shit down! I cant believe your friend doesn't have an anxiety attack about her kid. I was freaking out about my 9 month old crying and waking my house guests much less my kid being a terrible house guest in someone elses home! Ahhh!

[August Blooms]

Taitai That sounds... not fun. I hope your talk goes well and you guys can figure out something.

[August Blooms]

I’m leaning towards weaning when I get back home and feeling very guilty. I’ve just been pumping to get relief and this morning I woke up and I think my body has got the message. It was very uncomfortable the past 2 days. Things are going well back home as far as I can tell, DH seems very flustered at all the things he needs to get done since the IL’s are being their usual unhelpful selves. I can’t wait to see pics of them in their costumes.

[Taitai]

Hey everyone - in disguise taitai here.

Yeah...the talk...well...she rolled her eyes, got super defensive and just kept interrupting me, saying - “I know, I’m not a good parent.”

Ughhhh - so hard. I didn’t even get much out. I just asked if she and her husband could more actively supervise their kid, because we didn’t feel comfortable with him wandering around our house while everyone is sleeping, climbing the curtains, jumping on our really expensive air purifiers, stuff like that. And that’s basically all I got out before she replied sarcastically that she was a bad parent.

Yikes. I feel like she’s had talks like this before with others, so this isn’t new to her.

We’re really good friends, but I had no idea what her parenting style was like. I just think it’s so rude to be so hands off in someone else’s home - right? She has been very, very spoiled her whole life - so I think she’s not even aware of how rude they are being.

They are in the guest room and she said she was going to try to keep her kid up until 10pm tonight so he wouldn’t wake up at 4am again. I’m like - oh please don’t do that to your poor jet-lagged kid! Apparently every single night she just has him watch hours of dinosaur train and other shows on his iPad until he eventually passes out from sheer exhaustion in bed with her. I feel bad for him - that’s probably not good for a nearly 2 year old to have like 3-4 hours straight of screen time each night, and then only get 7-8 hours of sleep a night...plus regularly skipping naps.

I hope they only stay a week - because I can’t imagine longer. ☹️

[Taitai]

Oct 31, 2018 7:13:33 GMT -6 August Blooms said:

I’m leaning towards weaning when I get back home and feeling very guilty. I’ve just been pumping to get relief and this morning I woke up and I think my body has got the message. It was very uncomfortable the past 2 days. Things are going well back home as far as I can tell, DH seems very flustered at all the things he needs to get done since the IL’s are being their usual unhelpful selves. I can’t wait to see pics of them in their costumes.

Like was for you not having to deal with your ILs! Big, big hugs on the weaning - that is hard. Don’t feel guilty though - you are a great mom, and breastfeeding for one year is a really impressive accomplishment! I still know how you feel though - hugs again.

[mommabakes]

OMG Taitai I cannot imagine living that way. I hope your friend starts parenting soon and the visit is short. Just...yikes.

[CoachTsWife]

Taitai I don't understand your friends at all. I thought my BIL/SIL were pretty lax in their parenting but their ways are NOTHING compared to your guests. I feel really really bad for that kid. His little body needs sleep and routine. Maybe some of your parenting will rub off on him/them. FX?

[doodlemommy]

Just left DD’s Halloween costume parade and mini concert! I’m working today but I squeezed it in between appointments. My mom is taking the kids to ToT to my sister at the hospital after preschool (she is a nurse, working today) and DD can’t wait, they are bringing the treats and she thinks that’s hilarious. We are doing our usual “mummy dogs” for supper before ToTing tonight too so she is pretty much on cloud 9 lol. DS is less than thrilled with his costume because it has a hat 🙄 It’s going to be a looooong winter with that one, he also hates mittens 😬

[doodlemommy]

Taitai woah. That is something. I’m so sorry and I hope now it’s not awkward for you the rest of their trip. But seriously, i am on top of my kids at anyone’s house (except maybe my parents’ house but the kids are there all the time and know the rules), I cannot imagine just letting my kids terrorize someone else’s house and just watching it happen 😳

[codex320]

Taitai, oh my. She reminds me of some people i know though, like you can't tell them anything lest you are judging them. Which in this case, yes, judging away. That is absolutely not nice to be that way in someone else's house as a guest. I'm sure she is a great person but doesn't quite know how to tell her kid no. I hope, for the kids sake, that the parents figure it out soon. I hope their stay is short and you can get your house back!

i wonder if you could try to guide the kid by saying things like "don't climb on that you could get hurt" or "you could fall and hurt yourself if you keep running in the house". Ugh i would be full of anxiety.

[cougarette]

Sometimes I feel like I'm not doing enough parenting wise because my 3 year old can be such a nightmare. But it's nothing like that. Sheesh. 🍷🍷🍷

[Taitai]

Oct 31, 2018 10:02:29 GMT -6 codex320 said:

Taitai, oh my. She reminds me of some people i know though, like you can't tell them anything lest you are judging them. Which in this case, yes, judging away. That is absolutely not nice to be that way in someone else's house as a guest. I'm sure she is a great person but doesn't quite know how to tell her kid no. I hope, for the kids sake, that the parents figure it out soon. I hope their stay is short and you can get your house back!

i wonder if you could try to guide the kid by saying things like "don't climb on that you could get hurt" or "you could fall and hurt yourself if you keep running in the house". Ugh i would be full of anxiety.

It’s something! We definitely enforce the rules with her kid, but that then turns into us watching her kid basically, while she leaves the room and goes to the guest room to sit on her phone or computer!! Like - omg I am not your nanny. Just crazy.

We’ll see how today goes. She kept her kid up until 10pm on the iPad, but he still woke up at 5am (because of jet lag - which is normal). This poor, poor kid! He is playing and his eyes keep rolling back in his head because he is so tired ☹️.

[codex320]

Taitai good luck!!! I'm sure it will get better.

[cythe]

Taitai I hope today is going better. Maybe her kiddo will develop some good habits from being around you guys? Mainly in the sleep department, I'd guess. The climbing and lack of discipline seems like a different ball of wax.

[duskymonkey]

Oct 31, 2018 5:50:01 GMT -6 cythe said:

Taitai shut that shit down! I cant believe your friend doesn't have an anxiety attack about her kid. I was freaking out about my 9 month old crying and waking my house guests much less my kid being a terrible house guest in someone elses home! Ahhh!

I would be horrified and mortified too.

[duskymonkey]

Taitai, Oh dear! I really really take pity on the poor child. It's one thing if he is being difficult ( what 2 year old isn't ) but to encourage him not sleeping that is just awful. Poor child needs rest to and sleep for his own health benefit and growth. Even if you spoil your child would you not want the best for your child's well being? I don't get it and I am sure you're boggled by this too. If I let DS watch TV all night, he will definitely find a way to pry his eyes open as long as he can. To allow your child to fall asleep in exhaustion is just terrible. Maybe you can gently ask her if she has spoken about this with her pedi ( I am certain any pedi worth their salt will find this disturbing for the welfare of the child ) and also maybe offer her some suggestion about possibly enlisting help of a sleep consultant? Maybe the kid does have some sort of underlying behavioral issue which is causing him to not want to sleep? I remember around this age there was a phase where DS was really difficult to put down to sleep and the only way was for hubs or I to "sleep" with him - sometimes it took over an hour for him to fall asleep but all this happened in a dark quiet room. About the non supervision it's really for the safety of the kid and less about destroying your house. I would not allow my kid to wander about my house let alone someone else's at night regardless if our house is child proof cos they WILL somehow get into mischief and harm themselves. I also hope this wouldn't jeopardize your friendship. It's hard there are friends and there are "friends" how close are you to her? I have friends which I care deeply for that I can just be blatantly harsh with and there are those which I keep a little at an arms length about sensitive matters. Big hugs.