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Post by newspapers on Feb 2, 2024 8:33:28 GMT -6
I think Valentine's Day is more fun with school-age kids because they get so excited to hand out valentines and eat candy. Before kids, I was just like--eh? Maybe if they have the awesome Entenmann's holiday cupcakes.
I anticipate not finding it so cute during the teenage years!
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Post by newspapers on Feb 2, 2024 8:45:23 GMT -6
I think social media restriction for kids under 16 or so is a good idea. The data coming out show that it's not the screen time that is harmful to teens per se, but the SM.
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Post by sweptaway on Feb 2, 2024 8:59:16 GMT -6
I think social media restriction for kids under 16 or so is a good idea. The data coming out show that it's not the screen time that is harmful to teens per se, but the SM. My 11 year old is always begging for snap chat- all his friends have it! (he says). He's not allowed any social accounts at the moment, though I know he still watches plenty of dumb videos. I told him if he could prove to me that social media was good for tweens and teens I'd reconsider. He has yet to find any compelling research. |
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Post by newspapers on Feb 2, 2024 9:01:39 GMT -6
The ideal length for most TV series is the limited run "miniseries" model--8 episodes.
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Post by angelashly on Feb 2, 2024 9:20:16 GMT -6
SM can be detrimental for all ages and we need to show our kids this.
We can’t take it from them while addicted ourselves
*that doesn’t mean I don’t agree that it is bad for teens to have
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claudia
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Post by claudia on Feb 2, 2024 9:23:40 GMT -6
While I think just about everyone agrees that sports parents who are too intense are the worst, the ones who are super lackadaisical are also very annoying. Showing up 1 minute before the game starts (when asked to be there 15 minutes early for warmups), letting your kid goof off because "it's just a game," and all that makes it hard on the coach and also the players who really want to win or even just be able to play well enough to really learn the rules of the game.
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Post by angelashly on Feb 2, 2024 9:34:00 GMT -6
While I think just about everyone agrees that sports parents who are too intense are the worst, the ones who are super lackadaisical are also very annoying. Showing up 1 minute before the game starts (when asked to be there 15 minutes early for warmups), letting your kid goof off because "it's just a game," and all that makes it hard on the coach and also the players who really want to win or even just be able to play well enough to really learn the rules of the game. Yes! And if your kid doesn’t want to play or doesn’t like it don’t make them play it just to have an activity find one they do like |
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mapleme
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Post by mapleme on Feb 2, 2024 9:36:51 GMT -6
My kids are 7 and 9 and I'm trying to approach SM like I'm approaching alcohol. I won't be able to cut them off from it, but I can teach them to be responsible about it (and hold off as long as reasonable). And to hopefully give them the tools to recognize when it's becoming a problem.
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abs
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Post by abs on Feb 2, 2024 9:37:13 GMT -6
While I think just about everyone agrees that sports parents who are too intense are the worst, the ones who are super lackadaisical are also very annoying. Showing up 1 minute before the game starts (when asked to be there 15 minutes early for warmups), letting your kid goof off because "it's just a game," and all that makes it hard on the coach and also the players who really want to win or even just be able to play well enough to really learn the rules of the game. Yes! And if your kid doesn’t want to play or doesn’t like it don’t make them play it just to have an activity find one they do like And if your kid loves music or theatre or robotics or book club or whatever then that is wonderful! Don’t make them play a sport just because. Looking at you Texas parents! |
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Post by angelashly on Feb 2, 2024 9:38:53 GMT -6
My kids are 7 and 9 and I'm trying to approach SM like I'm approaching alcohol. I won't be able to cut them off from it, but I can teach them to be responsible about it (and hold off as long as reasonable). And to hopefully give them the tools to recognize when it's becoming a problem. This is how we are doing it too |
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STP
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Post by STP on Feb 2, 2024 9:42:42 GMT -6
My kids are 7 and 9 and I'm trying to approach SM like I'm approaching alcohol. I won't be able to cut them off from it, but I can teach them to be responsible about it (and hold off as long as reasonable). And to hopefully give them the tools to recognize when it's becoming a problem. Exactly. The idea that you are never on your phone around your kids is silly (not what anyone said here, got it). You model reasonable, responsible usage. And talk about it openly and honestly. We talk about alcohol, we talk about social media, in non-coded ways. |
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Post by angelashly on Feb 2, 2024 9:46:47 GMT -6
My kids are 7 and 9 and I'm trying to approach SM like I'm approaching alcohol. I won't be able to cut them off from it, but I can teach them to be responsible about it (and hold off as long as reasonable). And to hopefully give them the tools to recognize when it's becoming a problem. Exactly. The idea that you are never on your phone around your kids is silly (not what anyone said here, got it). You model reasonable, responsible usage. And talk about it openly and honestly. We talk about alcohol, we talk about social media, in non-coded ways. Yes Both dd and h get lost in TikTok sometimes. But they also show each other videos and I find it cute when they get excited to show the other a video. We preach making up your own mind, not everyone is telling the truth on there, and to come to us with any questions which she always says she knows she can do. |
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shadows
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Post by shadows on Feb 2, 2024 9:48:06 GMT -6
While I think just about everyone agrees that sports parents who are too intense are the worst, the ones who are super lackadaisical are also very annoying. Showing up 1 minute before the game starts (when asked to be there 15 minutes early for warmups), letting your kid goof off because "it's just a game," and all that makes it hard on the coach and also the players who really want to win or even just be able to play well enough to really learn the rules of the game. The group text from DS's football team last fall got heated because the coach wanted more practices (they were getting embarrassed every single game), and one parent kept saying "just let the kids have fun". I agree with letting kids have fun, but no one was having fun. Those poor kids were in tears at the end of every game. The extra practices helped so much. They still didn't win, but at least they kept things competitive and felt like they were playing their best. |
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adelbert
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Post by adelbert on Feb 2, 2024 9:57:20 GMT -6
Yes! And if your kid doesn’t want to play or doesn’t like it don’t make them play it just to have an activity find one they do like And if your kid loves music or theatre or robotics or book club or whatever then that is wonderful! Don’t make them play a sport just because. Looking at you Texas parents! I totally agree with this mindset but I'll also admit that we make our kids do at least one organized physical activity. But it doesn't have to be a team sport and if they stop liking something they can always quit and try something else. Of the three kids only one currently does a team sport which involves competition/games. Our experience has been that our kids are happier and more well balanced when they're also being active and unfortunately there just aren't enough opportunities for them to be active if they aren't engaged in some type of sports course or team where we live. But I'm just speaking for my kids. |
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Post by icedcoffee on Feb 2, 2024 10:11:10 GMT -6
Yeah I am the super mean mom for not letting my kids (10& almost 12) have snapchat or anything. All their friends have had that or tik tok since they were under 10. I just can't do it
They do play roblox so talk to friends on there, and the oldest has pinterest but she doesn't post anything. I don't think she even uses it that much anymore, it was more the idea of getting it.
It does amuse me that every once in awhile she will request to download snapchat or instagram (all apps have to be approved on her phone). I appreciate the effort thinking once I met let it slip through 🤣 (not gonna happen)
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Post by icedcoffee on Feb 2, 2024 10:13:55 GMT -6
I barely use social media anymore myself. Snapchat is just to keep up with college friends and I'll periodically post something on Instagram. Still guilty of the bored Facebook scroll but I've cut back tremendously on those and watching tik tok. I'm probably here more than anywhere else
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Post by lucilleaustero on Feb 2, 2024 10:21:16 GMT -6
I mean, social media is not going anywhere and it has been demonstrated that it can be incredibly harmful to kids/teens. It is now a part of parental responsibility to help them navigate this new world. We have to literally write the book as we go.
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Post by icedcoffee on Feb 2, 2024 10:22:10 GMT -6
Our oldest goes to the middle school next year (here it doesn't start til 7th) and I'm so happy to finally have school sports to join. Soooo much easier and cheaper
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McBenny
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Post by McBenny on Feb 2, 2024 10:22:47 GMT -6
In my experience, the kids that do the most are the ones that have been the most restricted. That has been what I saw when I was a teen and young adult. That is what I have seen in my daughter's age group. That is what I have seen in my son's group.
That being said, we have tried not to make anything particularly taboo. My kids got phones, younger than most. They've been on SM. At this SM is not that big a deal to them because it was never a big keep away. I have snapchat on my phone and my youngest is logged into it on my phone and his. So I can see snaps in live time if I want to. They mostly use it to message each other. Keep streaks going. There are a lot of pics of an eyeball, half a face, pets and younger siblings. Nothing overly salacious.
SM as in snapchat. They have very little interest in instagram. No interest in FB. Snapchat is the only one allowed so far. It's how middle school communicates with one another. How they meet people. They exchange snaps and don't exchange numbers etc.
The worst thing we have been through was group chats on regular texting. Surprisingly that is where they send inappropriate photos and the like.
This is what has worked for us so far. I do not care what other people choose to do. I support your choice as a parent for your child.
(I also have bark on the phone so it would alert when certain language is types out like self harm, weapons, etc. ) I try to focus on they will be exposed to this and that eventually. I want them to have the tools to know how to handle themselves when that time comes. Just like exposure to sex, drugs, etc.
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Post by lucilleaustero on Feb 2, 2024 10:24:18 GMT -6
I think kids and teens today view Facebook as something for their parents, not for them.
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Post by icedcoffee on Feb 2, 2024 10:25:22 GMT -6
McBenny does bark also work on snapchat? I have thought about once they get to middle school and start sports as I mentioned above that communication might be through snapchat. Right now everything is through the remind app so it hasn't come up yet
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McBenny
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Post by McBenny on Feb 2, 2024 10:26:23 GMT -6
I do not know any addicted to their phone adults. I only hear that here.
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Post by lucilleaustero on Feb 2, 2024 10:27:34 GMT -6
My husband coaches our son's basketball and soccer team. The kids all play adequately. But, all these parents out here thinking their kid is the next Messi yelling about play time when their little Tommy hasn't been to a single practice.
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Post by icedcoffee on Feb 2, 2024 10:27:41 GMT -6
Tbh snapchat is what scares me the most out of everything. I think they'd be ok for the most part on the other things but I've heard so many horror stories about snapchat so I'm trying to hold off as long as possible
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abs
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Post by abs on Feb 2, 2024 10:39:40 GMT -6
And if your kid loves music or theatre or robotics or book club or whatever then that is wonderful! Don’t make them play a sport just because. Looking at you Texas parents! I totally agree with this mindset but I'll also admit that we make our kids do at least one organized physical activity. But it doesn't have to be a team sport and if they stop liking something they can always quit and try something else. Of the three kids only one currently does a team sport which involves competition/games. Our experience has been that our kids are happier and more well balanced when they're also being active and unfortunately there just aren't enough opportunities for them to be active if they aren't engaged in some type of sports course or team where we live. But I'm just speaking for my kids. I agree being active is important but I disagree with the mindset here that sports are more important than anything else. We were at a birthday dinner a few weeks ago catching up with old friends and everyone looked at me like we were insane for letting DD prioritize band over softball. It was so off putting and cringey. Band has given my DD more confidence and enjoyment than any sport ever did so why wouldn’t we encourage that interest? It’s the prevalent attitude here though. Sports above all. |
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McBenny
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Post by McBenny on Feb 2, 2024 10:39:49 GMT -6
McBenny does bark also work on snapchat? I have thought about once they get to middle school and start sports as I mentioned above that communication might be through snapchat. Right now everything is through the remind app so it hasn't come up yet It won't necessarily save anything for you but it will alert you to something being said. Like hey there was violent language here or an inappropriate something there. It did alert me to language once about a video someone sent. I then got the phone and searched it and found the texts talking about the inappropriate video. I was able to find out what was on the video and who sent it to who. I was able to find out my kid never had the video before I asked him about it. (The video was one a kid at another school did that showed his mooning the camera. However, the rumor mill was saying that it was a sex act video.). It's a tool, not the end all be all or again, maybe I do not know how to fully work it. I think the biggest deterrent has been that I have it on my phone and he's logged in. So I can go through it and check old stories and or snaps etc. I can get the same alerts in live time. Like let's say, I have his phone taken from him. I can still see what kid was up and sending snaps at 3am. I don't even have to take his phone into my possession. Most of them are just connected on snap but don't really talk. |
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Post by icedcoffee on Feb 2, 2024 10:41:32 GMT -6
McBenny does bark also work on snapchat? I have thought about once they get to middle school and start sports as I mentioned above that communication might be through snapchat. Right now everything is through the remind app so it hasn't come up yet It won't necessarily save anything for you but it will alert you to something being said. Like hey there was violent language here or an inappropriate something there. It did alert me to language once about a video someone sent. I then got the phone and searched it and found the texts talking about the inappropriate video. I was able to find out what was on the video and who sent it to who. I was able to find out my kid never had the video before I asked him about it. (The video was one a kid at another school did that showed his mooning the camera. However, the rumor mill was saying that it was a sex act video.). It's a tool, not the end all be all or again, maybe I do not know how to fully work it. I think the biggest deterrent has been that I have it on my phone and he's logged in. So I can go through it and check old stories and or snaps etc. I can get the same alerts in live time. Like let's say, I have his phone taken from him. I can still see what kid was up and sending snaps at 3am. I don't even have to take his phone into my possession. Most of them are just connected on snap but don't really talk. Thank you, this is very helpful to know! |
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McBenny
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Post by McBenny on Feb 2, 2024 10:42:01 GMT -6
I totally agree with this mindset but I'll also admit that we make our kids do at least one organized physical activity. But it doesn't have to be a team sport and if they stop liking something they can always quit and try something else. Of the three kids only one currently does a team sport which involves competition/games. Our experience has been that our kids are happier and more well balanced when they're also being active and unfortunately there just aren't enough opportunities for them to be active if they aren't engaged in some type of sports course or team where we live. But I'm just speaking for my kids. I agree being active is important but I disagree with the mindset here that sports are more important than anything else. We were at a birthday dinner a few weeks ago catching up with old friends and everyone looked at me like we were insane for letting DD prioritize band over softball. It was so off putting and cringey. Band has given my DD more confidence and enjoyment than any sport ever did so why wouldn’t we encourage that interest? It’s the prevalent attitude here though. Sports above all. I don't see why one has to come over another. There is a commitment made to a team just like to band. So, your commitments with both should be fulfilled. If you no longer want to participate in something that's fine too. |
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abs
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Post by abs on Feb 2, 2024 10:42:04 GMT -6
Tbh snapchat is what scares me the most out of everything. I think they'd be ok for the most part on the other things but I've heard so many horror stories about snapchat so I'm trying to hold off as long as possible Same. I did let DD get an IG account for her 13th birthday (where she mostly follows her favorite baseball players) but there are lots of conditions around it. She doesn’t have anything else. Snapchat definitely seems to be the most problematic among girls. Holding off on that one for a very long time. |
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McBenny
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Post by McBenny on Feb 2, 2024 10:45:30 GMT -6
we did use to encourage them to pick a physical activity as well. It didn't have to be a sport, but it had to be something physical.
Mine have always wanted to try all the things. Well, the oldest has tried everything under the sun. The youngest wants to play every sport if we let him. His first word was ball. He always had a ball in his hand as a toddler so it's been consistent.
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