king26
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Post by king26 on Sept 2, 2017 14:44:45 GMT -6
Thanks muscari, I think we will try giving him a little more formula before he goes down to bed tonight. happyfeet9, Thanks for the advice on the weight loss, BFing, and supplementing. @starzia, Thank you! I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one supplementing. This stuff is hard! Good call on the A&D as well, I will try that.
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muscari
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Post by muscari on Sept 2, 2017 14:51:13 GMT -6
Omg muscari, I could have written what you wrote about your dh and breastfeeding. Mine is always wanting to supplement with formula bc he thinks I don't make enough milk because I didn't with DS1 and DS2 is cluster feeding like crazy and not seeming satisfied. I get upset bc I worry about further reducing my supply and it can get very tense. These early days of breastfeeding are tough! I am sorry you are dealing with a similar supplement-happy husband but am glad at the same time to know I am not the only one. I know they just want what is best for their LOs and it doesn't mean they aren't supportive with BFing etc But I guess they just don't realize it could mess with our supply (possible making it worse)? And well it also messes with my feelings and makes me feel inadequate or something..while I know I am doing all I can to make this BFing thing work. And he knows that too, he often complements me on it during the day- at night his anxiety and exhaustion just takes over. I just really hate how tense it got a couple of times and am sad to admit we once even had a row about it (early on, we have since learned to communicate better on this..). So much guilt over this as D. was with us in the room and I worry cause she must feel the tension and all too then.
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muscari
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Post by muscari on Sept 2, 2017 14:52:21 GMT -6
king26 good luck- I hope supplementing a little more will help you both have a better night! 🍼
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Post by happyfeet9 on Sept 2, 2017 14:53:52 GMT -6
muscari I don't think there is a particular order that is best as long as you're trying to alternate wherever she left off. You'll find most babies prefer one side to another and with pumping you'll often find one side produces more, so don't worry if it doesn't completely even out. Sounds like you're doing all the right things! Fwiw, I wouldn't pay for an LC right now either unless she wasn't gaining weight, wetting diapers, or was having legit latch issues. Breastfeeding is hard! So much of it is trial and error and what works best for you both. There's also great online resources as well. Also, MH still gives me grief about pumping for the twins, even though I'm 100% sure it's what's best for all of us. I wish our H's could have boobs for one night of cluster feeding to see what we go through.
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addymac
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Post by addymac on Sept 2, 2017 16:33:30 GMT -6
T&Ps to everyone dealing with feeding issues. My nipple/boob pain has me feeding one side and pumping the other bc I would cry if he went near my right boob. But I am pumping just enough to meet his requirements, nothing to spare, so I am preparing myself that formula may need to enter the equation even though DH is adamantly against it. But he also discovered how wonderful pumping can be- since he now gets to participate in feedings!!
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jt2378
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Post by jt2378 on Sept 2, 2017 17:06:47 GMT -6
muscari, my lefties was the big producer first time and it looks like that will be the case again. Righty is kind of a dud and definitely produces less so yeah I will be forever lopsided I guess 😂
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cali
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Post by cali on Sept 2, 2017 17:16:50 GMT -6
muscari king26 we usually supplement between 1-2 oz depending on how well she nurses first. We just let her take as much as she wants. Sometimes she takes it all and sometimes she leaves a good bit. I usually nurse her and then if she is still acting very hungry we will offer her a supplement bottle. I don't have any real system, I just kind of go with my gut feeling on if she still seems hungry. We usually end up supplementing maybe 2-3 times a day and mainly at night because I don't have the patience to let her nurse for an hour like she likes to. I pump for 10-15 minutes after every nursing session. Usually I only get about an ounce or an ounce and a half total and I save it to supplement the next feeding.Also, I try to save up enough for one full bottle (2.5 oz) so that DH can take one of the night time feedings and I can sleep. DH has also given a formula bottle at night when I haven't been able to pump enough. Also, as for an LC, I've now seen three and no way would I pay for it. I feel like they have all told me different things and I haven't really found any of them to be very helpful. Our current plan is kind of what I came up with on my own after taking all of their advice into account and reading a lot on my own. There's so much conflicting advice out there it makes it hard. I feel really frustrated and hope I'm not fucking things up, but I'm doing the best I can.
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cali
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Post by cali on Sept 2, 2017 17:17:40 GMT -6
muscari, my lefties was the big producer first time and it looks like that will be the case again. Righty is kind of a dud and definitely produces less so yeah I will be forever lopsided I guess 😂 Same here. Definitely have noticed this while pumping and baby prefers the left side as well.
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jt2378
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Post by jt2378 on Sept 2, 2017 17:57:53 GMT -6
+2 baby only wants the left suddenly. LC says start pumping the right. There's already a noticeable size difference... LC also gave me ideas to get her eating on the other side too. Just when I think I have BF under control... I start on the right almost every time. I pumped for 10 months 3 times a day at work and still never produced more than like 1.5 ounces on that side and would get 3-4 ounces off lefty every time. So just to say it made no difference with me
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king26
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Post by king26 on Sept 2, 2017 18:12:31 GMT -6
I'm jealous you get a full ounce when you pump cali, I get about 1/3 of an ounce when I pump but I only do it sporadically. Maybe I should try after each feeding. I just don't know if I have the time or patience. I'm worried I'm not cut out for breastfeeding.
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yoshijo
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Post by yoshijo on Sept 2, 2017 18:35:13 GMT -6
I just wanna say thanks for starting a new thread, the other was driving me nuts. Too long. Lolz
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muscari
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Post by muscari on Sept 2, 2017 19:20:44 GMT -6
I'm jealous you get a full ounce when you pump cali, I get about 1/3 of an ounce when I pump but I only do it sporadically. Maybe I should try after each feeding. I just don't know if I have the time or patience. I'm worried I'm not cut out for breastfeeding. Me too! Now I only started pumping again this afternoon so don't have much recent data just yet lol. But this afternoon after a feed I pumped just under 15ml (so.. little over 1/3rd.of an oz I think) then this evening after sorta cluster feeding for a good while I got maybe 2-3ml LOL. The plan here is to pump after feedings during the day and use this to supplement at night - in hopes to be able to eleminate formula tho it may take a while for that to happen?? MH and I actually got into a fight about supplementing once again tonight and it got rather ugly.... 😔😢😭 I try so hard and he does appreciate that but feels so strongly about not wanting her hungry and we just aren't on the same page.. He also worries I over exhaust myself by cluster feeding at night.. he may have a point buy what else can I do?? I dont pump in the MOTN and we supplement when things get a little crazy for that reason.. but well her fussy hour(s) are still MOTN too so yeah. Do any of you have any good resources on BF- and specifically about how to trigger supply etc - I could point him out to? I checked out kellymom but got lost in the amount of articles.. so any particular ones that are really useful would be appreciated (or other websites or sources)! She finally seems to have settled.. after hickups and bad cramps and what we call "spuitpoep" lol.. projectile poopies?? And supplementing with 15ml BM and 40ml formula.. MH fell asleep and I hope she will soon too..
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muscari
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Post by muscari on Sept 2, 2017 19:22:13 GMT -6
I just wanna say thanks for starting a new thread, the other was driving me nuts. Too long. Lolz Yeah I thought so too heh plus we reached September so it seemed ti be time. I figure we may go back to weekly randoms threads now? Easier to keep up with.
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muscari
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Post by muscari on Sept 2, 2017 19:27:39 GMT -6
Is it bad if she falls asleep while on the boob still? Like...with the nipple in her mouth? Often she will spit it out and lay her cheek on my boob/nipple then dozes off but sometimes she dozes off before letting go of the nipple. I use nipple shields since she couldn't latch on otherwise (darn nipples wouldnt make the proper form).so I am not really worried about damaging my nipples just wondering whether tis bad for D herself somehow?
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Post by thinkchocolate05 on Sept 2, 2017 19:34:30 GMT -6
muscari, my lefties was the big producer first time and it looks like that will be the case again. Righty is kind of a dud and definitely produces less so yeah I will be forever lopsided I guess 😂 Same here. Definitely have noticed this while pumping and baby prefers the left side as well. Same for me too!! Left is majorly preferred and was for DS1 as well. Yields more pumping too
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Post by thinkchocolate05 on Sept 2, 2017 19:42:22 GMT -6
Is it bad if she falls asleep while on the boob still? Like...with the nipple in her mouth? Often she will spit it out and lay her cheek on my boob/nipple then dozes off but sometimes she dozes off before letting go of the nipple. I use nipple shields since she couldn't latch on otherwise (darn nipples wouldnt make the proper form).so I am not really worried about damaging my nipples just wondering whether tis bad for D herself somehow? [br Mine does this all the time and the older one did too. I can't think of how it could be a problem at the newborn stage. Much later on, (6 months or so, I think) some people prefer for the baby not to nurse to sleep and put them down in the crib sleepy but awake so that they learn to fall asleep that way. But that's a matter of personal preference and would be for the future anyway. I think it's sweet how sleepy and contented they look sleeping on the boob and they are only this little once.
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jt2378
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Post by jt2378 on Sept 2, 2017 19:55:20 GMT -6
I'm sorry things are tough with YH right now muscari. Cluster feeding is completely normal at this age and actually very important. Its natures way of signaling your body to produce more. I know it's exhausting but these first 6 weeks are usually the hardest before things start to settle a bit. Men in general just have no idea about BF. I can't think of any particular sites besides Kellymom but maybe post and ask over on the BF board. Those ladies are usually very knowledgeable and helpful
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Post by thinkchocolate05 on Sept 2, 2017 20:22:18 GMT -6
muscari This specific article on Kellymom helped me. I didn't give it to my dh to read bc he's made up his mind that I don't have enough supply and that is that, but it might help with yours. kellymom.com/parenting/parenting-faq/fussy-evening/I can't make it hyper link, sorry. And I would not worry about causing Dd stress by arguing in front of her occasionally. You are doing great.
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Post by Deleted on Sept 2, 2017 20:26:26 GMT -6
muscari, cluster feeding is normal and babies are fussy. Try not to get too stressed out about your output right now. If she's gaining back her weight and having the appropriate amount of wet diapers than it's fine. My only worry with supplementing too much is she may get used to that much milk, and you might not produce as much as she'll expect. It takes a while to get 2oz from nursing, so those night feeds feel like forever. But I've noticed that A has gone longer and with less amount in the MOTN. Even at 4 weeks.
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cali
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Post by cali on Sept 2, 2017 21:32:58 GMT -6
muscari, M falls asleep at the boob pretty much every time I nurse her. It is super frustrating because sometimes she will fall asleep after only like five minutes of nursing and she is so soundly sleeping that I can't get her to wake enough to keep feeding. I usually just take her off and wait for her to wake up and want to eat. I'm sorry you're having trouble with YH. MH worries about her being hungry too but I think I've finally convinced him to at least try it this way for now. As for YH's concerns about you exhausting yourself, he may have a point. After I got very sick last week I realized my body was telling me it could not keep up with the cluster feeding all night and needed more rest, which is why we supplement with formula or pumped milk for motn feeding now. It has definitely helped me get more rest and I do think that is super important (and also helps your supply).
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addymac
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Post by addymac on Sept 2, 2017 22:34:02 GMT -6
Welp I have little to offer in terms of advice for feeding but I understand the stress. I just had a full on breakdown crying fit instead of eating dinner with ugly sobs and my DH sent me to bed for 2+ hours because I'm so wiped out and overwhelmed. We had enough pumped to feed him at 9 but now we are back to no leftover milk But I got a 2 hr nap after I cried myself to sleep. 😔🤷🏻♀️😏😕 and now my left nipple is starting to hurt like heck.
How has humanity survived if BF is / can be / so difficult???
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cwbh928
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Post by cwbh928 on Sept 2, 2017 22:59:48 GMT -6
I just wanted to pop in before I pass out again..I haven't read through everything butttt....
Breastfeeding isn't fun or easy sometimes! I feel for all the momma's who are struggling. I went through hell with my first (lactation consultants, poor Wright gain, etc). This time around he is feeding and latching better thanks to nipple shield. However, the cluster feedings and his growth spurts have drained me physically, mentally and emotionally. Even though he has a great number of wet/solid diapers I find myself contantslt wondering if he is getting enough. It's stressful.
I can relate to those who are struggling. I do know that there is a light at the end and that you need to do what's best for your sanity.
Right now I am sad becuase staying in the hospital has certainly affected my supply on top of not eating for over 24 hours. It stinks, but hoping it will come back!
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bsouls
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Post by bsouls on Sept 3, 2017 0:28:48 GMT -6
I really hate that they make it seem like breastfeeding is so easy.. last time the lactation consultant told me that women with PCOS struggle with breastfeeding. I thought that was interesting since so many women struggle with infertility and I wonder if that has made it harder for women. Or, if women always struggled and that's one of the reasons that infant mortality was high back in the day. I hope it gets easier for everyone.
H let me go to bed at 6pm, because I was wiped out. He just brought R to bed at 2am. He stayed up, so I could get as much sleep without being woken up to do a feeding. I feel much better and I'm snuggling R before I try putting her back in the bassinet (she wouldn't stop fussing).
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jt2378
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Post by jt2378 on Sept 3, 2017 3:50:50 GMT -6
Sorry for all the struggles ladies. Newborns are so hard and add in BF in these early weeks can really be difficult. Y'all are doing a great job and one thing they all say is don't give up on a bad day.
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addymac
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Post by addymac on Sept 3, 2017 4:44:01 GMT -6
Oh cwbh928 im so sorry you had to go back in and it's affecting your supply. I hope it rebounds once you're out again. bsouls omg 6p-2a sounds amazing. I was excited for 830-1030 haha!! I am so thankful DH is on vacation these next two weeks because he has been such a wonderful support so far even with working. Hopefully I can pump enough to see through at least one feeding straight to get some more sleep.
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addymac
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Post by addymac on Sept 3, 2017 4:46:52 GMT -6
Q: what's the longest in a car you would be comfortable with driving with a 2-3 week old?
DH wants to drive to go do some shopping at the outlets in the next two weeks but they're a good 45 minutes away from us. I get really nervous at the idea of being in a car with N for that long bc usually he screams a lot and ends up falling asleep, waking up, screaming, falls asleep, repeat... in the car rides we've had that are like 10 minutes! I don't know if I could handle that for 45 minutes.
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muscari
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Post by muscari on Sept 3, 2017 4:57:52 GMT -6
Will respond to the rest later but had another Q first. Do you all track breastfeeding sessions? And how to you time those? Sometimes D feeds for quite a while but other times she will stop feeding pretty quickly then just lays there enjoying the occasional suckle and dozes off. Do I time just the active drinking bit or??
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muscari
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Post by muscari on Sept 3, 2017 4:59:09 GMT -6
addymac MH has one more week off work and goes back september 12 and I am already dreading it. For myself but also for him.. how on earth he is going to juggle those broken nights with work is beyond me 😲
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bsouls
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Post by bsouls on Sept 3, 2017 5:44:03 GMT -6
addymac we took T on a 7+ hour drive for my grandma's funeral when she was 3 months. She slept most of the way. But, if your baby doesn't like the car, then I wouldn't do it. I can't stand a baby crying in the car. muscari We track the start time of each feed. When I breastfed last time we did track the amount of formula or any pumped milk as well, but not how long on the breast. We actually tracked T until a little over a year old, because it made it easy for anyone babysitting to know when she last ate. We also track poop. I like documenting things, I guess.
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cali
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Post by cali on Sept 3, 2017 7:49:24 GMT -6
addymac, we inadvertently took M for a very long car ride last week because we went to the store for one item after taking her to her pedi appointment and ended up having to go to multiple stores to find it in stock. We ended up being in the car for like almost 3 hours and right at the end she started having a meltdown and it was horrible! We had to pull over and I had to nurse her in a parking lot to calm her down. Iam now limiting our car time to no more than one hour at a time until she's a bit older.
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