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Post by peachsmama on May 6, 2019 9:17:42 GMT -6
I had a dental cleaning this morning and now I'm treating myself to brunch. I have to track down 2 parts for our golf cart then get some groceries. And work. But I also found a bench I've been wanting on Facebook market place last night so dad is helping me get that at 2. Busy day.
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tallb
Amethyst
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Post by tallb on May 6, 2019 9:19:10 GMT -6
Geez jewels how selfish! I'm sorry you are dealing with that, geez. I'd prob have a hard time going over for mother's day, I think you deserve to be spoiled this year. When parents act ridiculous, I try to think of it as a lesson in how not to act as a grandparent someday... |
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mwhip
Opal
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Post by mwhip on May 6, 2019 9:20:14 GMT -6
jewels I'm sorry your mom is being awful about Mother's Day/birthday. You are a better person than me, I'd tell her how I felt about it all and plan my own Mother's Day. Why do people have to be so damn difficult? Back at work, trying to get caught up. It's pretty depressing realizing a week ago, I was sitting on the beach with a drink.
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mwhip
Opal
Posts: 9,175 Likes: 56,613
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Post by mwhip on May 6, 2019 9:20:55 GMT -6
tgrimes is your H giving notice this morning???
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tgrimes
Diamond
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Post by tgrimes on May 6, 2019 9:22:47 GMT -6
tgrimes is your H giving notice this morning??? Yes! He already did. His boss just said to tell HR and help them find his replacement. |
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cagoldi
Opal
Vegan Demon
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Post by cagoldi on May 6, 2019 9:27:59 GMT -6
I need another Colorado trip. I haven't felt relaxed since I got back. Maybe Cadence and I will just move there. Let’s do it. |
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Sunny41
Sapphire
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Post by Sunny41 on May 6, 2019 9:41:58 GMT -6
I’m sorry jewels . Maybe you can tell your dad that you would rather not hear these things she says. You don’t need that on your plate. Especially after you did call her twice the day of. I hate when our parents unload on us and then we are stuck with emotional mess. Sending hugs. I know it’s hard, but try not to feel bad about the situation. You are doing your best without having to cater to grown people. this is great advice and it sounds like he wants you to handle it than him handle it. He could remind her about the phone calls and the family history. Also I know that I complain to MH about things that I wouldn't want to get to SD (like the laughing at the house photo), and I am sure she feels the same way. You know, when you vent about your child and that helps release it into the world (even if the vent is irrational). And sometimes I feel dad's do it because they can't cope and they feel like it makes them a better person for telling you and makes you two closer and furhter from your mom. |
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trtlcrzy
Moderator 
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Post by trtlcrzy on May 6, 2019 9:46:46 GMT -6
Morning! DH is at work for the only day this week, and H is at school. S has spent the whole morning watching the little mermaid and I’ve been avoiding going out to work in the yard. I know I just need to do it though. Nothing planned for the rest of the day, maybe we will go to a park or the zoo since the rest of the week is going to be rainy.
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cagoldi
Opal
Vegan Demon
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Post by cagoldi on May 6, 2019 9:48:14 GMT -6
That was a great read, Sunny41. Thanks so much for sharing it. I thoroughly appreciate seeing autistic’s perspective, it helps me navigate things better in the present. |
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trtlcrzy
Moderator
Posts: 10,085 Likes: 58,458
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Post by trtlcrzy on May 6, 2019 9:49:35 GMT -6
jewels sorry your mom is being a selfish brat about Mother’s Day. I feel like going out for brunch with her should be enough and then you can go home and spend time with your family. tgrimes how is it YH’s responsibility to find his replacement?
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jewels
Opal
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Post by jewels on May 6, 2019 9:50:35 GMT -6
Geez jewels how selfish! I'm sorry you are dealing with that, geez. I'd prob have a hard time going over for mother's day, I think you deserve to be spoiled this year. When parents act ridiculous, I try to think of it as a lesson in how not to act as a grandparent someday... Yes, I am trying to put this in my brain to remember when I am a grandparent. Although I will never be the mom of a mom so I guess it's slightly different. The funny thing is she is constantly telling me to let her know if she starts getting awful with the guilt trips like her mother does... I've tried to politely tell her she already is but she does not see it. Apparently my dad told her the same thing a week or so ago and she flipped out on him. She's... a lot. Always has been. Oh, and I just decided to order the flowers now so I don't forget and I got through the whole thing to order for her, my MIL and my 98 year old grandma, and went to grab my wallet to pay, and my wallet is in my diaper bag. I am really winning today. |
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jewels
Opal
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Post by jewels on May 6, 2019 9:53:11 GMT -6
I’m sorry jewels . Maybe you can tell your dad that you would rather not hear these things she says. You don’t need that on your plate. Especially after you did call her twice the day of. I hate when our parents unload on us and then we are stuck with emotional mess. Sending hugs. I know it’s hard, but try not to feel bad about the situation. You are doing your best without having to cater to grown people. this is great advice and it sounds like he wants you to handle it than him handle it. He could remind her about the phone calls and the family history. Also I know that I complain to MH about things that I wouldn't want to get to SD (like the laughing at the house photo), and I am sure she feels the same way. You know, when you vent about your child and that helps release it into the world (even if the vent is irrational). And sometimes I feel dad's do it because they can't cope and they feel like it makes them a better person for telling you and makes you two closer and furhter from your mom. This is definitely not my dad's motivation. My dad literally doesn't have a mean or selfish bone in his body. He honestly was just upset that my mom was upset and thought he could fix it. |
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Sunny41
Sapphire
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Post by Sunny41 on May 6, 2019 9:56:18 GMT -6
I am at work and I wish I took today to work from home while it is nice outside. I realized we didn't have Elliot do any homework in April so we did this weeks last night and I left it on the floor at home this morning. I better get my act together for K!
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cagoldi
Opal
Vegan Demon
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Post by cagoldi on May 6, 2019 10:07:15 GMT -6
this is great advice and it sounds like he wants you to handle it than him handle it. He could remind her about the phone calls and the family history. Also I know that I complain to MH about things that I wouldn't want to get to SD (like the laughing at the house photo), and I am sure she feels the same way. You know, when you vent about your child and that helps release it into the world (even if the vent is irrational). And sometimes I feel dad's do it because they can't cope and they feel like it makes them a better person for telling you and makes you two closer and furhter from your mom. This is definitely not my dad's motivation. My dad literally doesn't have a mean or selfish bone in his body. He honestly was just upset that my mom was upset and thought he could fix it. Completely unsurprising. Sounds like pretty typical symbiotic dysfunction where someone toxic marries a people pleaser. |
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klong11
Ruby
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Post by klong11 on May 6, 2019 10:22:09 GMT -6
I just ordered pizza for the teacher's potluck lunch tomorrow in celebration of teacher week. Then, I had to immediately call the pizza place because I accidentally made it for delivery today instead of tomorrow.
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cagoldi
Opal
Vegan Demon
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Post by cagoldi on May 6, 2019 10:22:54 GMT -6
Shit. I forgot Teacher Appreciation Week.
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jewels
Opal
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Post by jewels on May 6, 2019 10:28:50 GMT -6
Our school does not do anything for teacher's appreciation week. No idea if some families do it, but we do not. We do something for Christmastime, a small something for Valentines Day, and a "move up" gift.
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vino
Opal
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Post by vino on May 6, 2019 10:30:10 GMT -6
I'm sorry jewels, that's a lot to deal with and she is being extremely selfish, but that seems to be her routine. Please dont be guilted into spending loads of money, take that money and treat yourself. When you're ready I'd say it's time to rock the boat and create boundaries. |
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jewels
Opal
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Post by jewels on May 6, 2019 10:38:49 GMT -6
I'm sorry jewels , that's a lot to deal with and she is being extremely selfish, but that seems to be her routine. Please dont be guilted into spending loads of money, take that money and treat yourself. When you're ready I'd say it's time to rock the boat and create boundaries. I do this every few years, and nothing ever changes. She just will never see it from any other perspective but her own. I usually don't get bothered by it but I have been very emotionally fragile lately. She does love the boys so much and they adore her so I try to just focus on that. My original plan was to have them over to BBQ but I emailed earlier saying I said we would do brunch since it's a limited amount of time and I can spend the rest of my day with my boys. |
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Post by lahdeedah on May 6, 2019 10:47:40 GMT -6
Shit. I forgot Teacher Appreciation Week. +1 |
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Post by cheeksmum on May 6, 2019 10:49:58 GMT -6
Sorry for the shitty start vino. We seem to be having the same challenges here with N. jewels, I’m sorry you’re mom is acting that way. You shouldn’t feel guilty, it sounds like this is just how she is but it’s unfortunate that she doesn’t see it that way. Brunch sounds like a good all around option and then gives you the rest of the day to hopefully relax a bit. |
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lfig
Sapphire
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Post by lfig on May 6, 2019 10:59:34 GMT -6
Morning. I had to wake N up at 8:15, girl was tired. Dropped her off at school and came home and went on a walk with H and the dog. Now I’m home and trying to plan my week. Dh and I want to buy something for our family for summer time, either a camper or a pontoon. Not sure what the right decision is but we’ve been thinking about it for a couple of years. Well, yesterday, my sister and BIL bought a cabin on a nice lake about 20 minutes away and said we could keep a boat there if we got one, so now we’re really leaning that way. I think it would be a lot of fun, but I just hope we’d get enough use of out it. I vote pontoon! We have so much fun at the lake and Sierra is in her happy place there! I don't think you will regret it. How far away is the cabin and lake? The lake we go to is a 1 hour 45 minute drive one way. But we will often go for a "day trip" and leave our house by 7, on the water by 9, then have the whole day to play. We will take off the water around 4 or 5, grab dinner on the way home. But we also try to take a whole weekend (which for us is middle of the week) about once a month. So we will get a cabin for 2 nights. We will go down on a Monday evening after we get off work and have all day Tuesday and most of the day Wed to play before we head home. Then back to work Thursday. |
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guster
Emerald
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Post by guster on May 6, 2019 11:06:15 GMT -6
vino, sorry for the rough start. We typically have a rougher month with J toward the end of April middle of May. I read something last year about the developmental issues they go through at the half year mark and I always try to keep it in the back of my mind. it does suck, however, if you and yh not on the same page. jewels, i’m sorry it’s a lot to deal with.
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vino
Opal
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Post by vino on May 6, 2019 11:28:52 GMT -6
vino , sorry for the rough start. We typically have a rougher month with J toward the end of April middle of May. I read something last year about the developmental issues they go through at the half year mark and I always try to keep it in the back of my mind. it does suck, however, if you and yh not on the same page. jewels , i’m sorry it’s a lot to deal with. Interesting, thanks for this. I'm going to do some research and hopefully there are some suggestions to navigate it. |
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nam2013
Emerald
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Post by nam2013 on May 6, 2019 11:36:39 GMT -6
vino sorry for the crappy start. Hopefully things turn around. slenle I vote camper, seems like sooooo much fun in the states!
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nam2013
Emerald
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Post by nam2013 on May 6, 2019 11:45:57 GMT -6
Started my day with a mommy daughter date, she is beyond adorable. Afterwards my rat race day started, errands, groceries, swim lessons & dd 3y well check. Apparently we have a slightly above average tall girl (new territory for us!) at 38.5 inch (60%), she’s a skinny Minnie at 30lbs (14%), but she’s staying in her own growth curve, so it’s fine. Language development, motor skills and sight are all more than fine. They told me not to worry about het not being potty trained yet ‘she’ll get there’. I’m so proud off my baby girl, can’t believe she’s almost three.
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jewels
Opal
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Post by jewels on May 6, 2019 11:51:09 GMT -6
vino , sorry for the rough start. We typically have a rougher month with J toward the end of April middle of May. I read something last year about the developmental issues they go through at the half year mark and I always try to keep it in the back of my mind. it does suck, however, if you and yh not on the same page. jewels , i’m sorry it’s a lot to deal with. Interesting. S has been overly emotional lately and I've been chalking it up to his dad coming back but maybe there's more to it than that. This morning he had a full meltdown because he didn't want to change out of his underwear to get dressed. After explaining that it was not up for negotiation he finally agreed, only if he could wear his Yoda underwear. Which are in the laundry. Cue next meltdown. |
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guster
Emerald
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Post by guster on May 6, 2019 12:13:02 GMT -6
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Post by wineallthetime on May 6, 2019 12:37:11 GMT -6
jewels, I'm sorry. How frustrating. MIL is really dramatic about that stuff. Last year she cried on Mother's day because we didn't post about her on Facebook..
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Post by peachsmama on May 6, 2019 12:38:13 GMT -6
jewels, I'm sorry. How frustrating. MIL is really dramatic about that stuff. Last year she cried on Mother's day because we didn't post about her on Facebook.. How dare you. |
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