hrh
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Post by hrh on Feb 5, 2019 14:37:57 GMT -6
strawberrykiki popped in to check on you, so sorry it's ended up being such a marathon! You are definitely getting close being at an 8. Sorry too for the decels, I had that with DS1 too and it is scary. Glad they were able to find a good position for you, I hope things move quickly and safely for you both now! You're doing so awesome, finish line (and carbs!) is in sight! Hugs!
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hrh
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Post by hrh on Feb 5, 2019 14:48:36 GMT -6
I think no matter what we choose, I'm always going to feel the pull to have "just one more baby." It's so bittersweet thinking about closing the pregnancy/tiny babies chapter of our lives forever. 😭 This is how I feel. We are 100% done, we had initially only planned on two so three is already pushing it. If finances weren't a consideration I might go for a fourth but that's not the case. I can only stretch myself so far, too, and age is also a consideration. After DS2 when I thought we were done I sobbed hysterically, I just didn't feel done at all. I will always feel the pull but I feel a good kind of finality now, our family will feel complete after this baby. It's a "big" family by today's standards but manageable for me as a SAHM. I also think I'll always have the feeling of guilt for the youngest that she's the youngest, if that makes sense - I am choosing to not give her the chance to be an older sibling. And I feel guilty that DS1 and DS2 have each other but DD won't have a sister. But that's a viciously never ending pattern so DD is just going to have to cope with being the youngest and the only girl! Mom guilt, I'm queen of it.
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Post by sunshiney on Feb 5, 2019 15:00:04 GMT -6
hrh. Ugh mom guilt! Already fighting it and no baby even here yet lol. That was a big wake up call that helped me know we'll be OAD, my reasons for a second basically all had to do with a feeling of duty to give baby a sibling. So learned that there are pros and cons either way and remind myself of the pros when I'm feeling guilty about the cons!
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dashook
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Post by dashook on Feb 5, 2019 15:13:26 GMT -6
We’re not done for sure. We both want a fourth but I think the determining factor will be whether I’m healthy enough to go through another pregnancy. I’m going to turn 35 later this year so we don’t have unlimited time to decide. I might talk to my OB about it at my 6 week appointment. Honestly if she advises against it I think I will be crushed. At the same time I am really happy with our family right now (though I have days where I feel so sad/guilty that DD won’t have a sister).
Birth control is a very touchy subject for me. I do not ever want to take BCP again and IUDs scare me a lot. I recently found out though that I am allowed to have the Mirena (having previously been told no because of my BP) so I may reconsider. But honestly I resent the fact that it always has to be me to bear the burden with BC. I did it for so many years and I also am the one that had to destroy my body with 3 pregnancies and childbirths in less than 5 years.
MH is kind of a dick about it honestly. He has flat out said he will never get a vasectomy though we haven’t actually had a discussion about this ever, so I’m not sure what his reasoning is. He also doesn’t want to use condoms. Before I got pregnant with V we were using NFP and obviously it did not work. NBD because we wanted another baby so we were thrilled when I got KU, but I don’t need another “surprise” especially if my doctor tells me I should not bear more children. So H begrudgingly has said he’s open to condoms for now.
The V talk will happen at some point in the future once we’re settled on a fourth kid or not. I think it would make sense for us and want to at least try to talk him into it.
If all else fails I’m a big fan of abstinence 👌🏻
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hrh
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Post by hrh on Feb 5, 2019 15:13:55 GMT -6
sunshiney you're 100% right. No matter what there's mom guilt! I have guilt about having a third, too, because of the boys having to share a room! lol can't win, but at the same time you're so spot on - I need to focus on the pros and not the cons, it's a good reminder thank you. <3
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Post by thelittleredm on Feb 5, 2019 15:22:56 GMT -6
dashook, H was SO against getting a V before this 3rd surprise. Like, he was adamantly against it. I still don't get it but at least he's willing to do his part now when we decide we're done.
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Post by notagoddess on Feb 5, 2019 15:30:46 GMT -6
I do still want a third kid. But pregnancy was rough, not just for me but for my family. And my DD went from an easy baby to a wild toddler, just as my ability to cope went down. I don't know if I have it in me to do it again, knowing what it costs. I also think the transition from 1-2 kids will be difficult for us all, and I don't want to be spread too thin. Hopefully things will be clearer in a couple of years.
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Post by thelittleredm on Feb 5, 2019 18:44:37 GMT -6
I am starving. Good thing we are headed to a Brazilian grill for H's late birthday dinner! Not that there's space inside me for that much food AND a baby so, you know. Guess that means A needs to pay attention to the eviction vibes I keep sending her.
Her check up is tomorrow and I am so tempted to ask for a sweep. I'm so tired of not sleeping and this SPD shit. But I'll only be 38 weeks Thursday so I doubt they'd do it.
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Post by redhead610 on Feb 5, 2019 18:51:18 GMT -6
dashook, I'm sorry to hear your husband is against a v. The other day, DH and I were talking about him needing to get talking to a dr and he said something about being under general anesthesia. I was like, uh, pretty sure its local. And then he gave me a look. And so I reminded him I've been on BC for 10+ years, been pregnant 4 times, had to have a d&c, 3 child births- he can handle a minor procedure.
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Post by redhead610 on Feb 5, 2019 18:54:51 GMT -6
Today was ds3's 1 month appt. He's still a peanut, only 1 lb above his birth weight. The last week his poop has been straight liquid, so we are going to switch his formula to see if that helps his tummy and maybe helps put on weight.
I ended up going back to the dr with ds2 later in the afternoon. He's been weirdly fussy and started not eating anything, and had fevers on and off. Turns out he has an ear infection in both ears.
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Post by thelittleredm on Feb 5, 2019 22:12:17 GMT -6
TMI probably but....
It's so uncomfortable, borderline painful, to go to the bathroom. A is so low in my pelvis, it causes crazy amounts of pressure to sit on a toilet or anything similar. Like, I feel like I could cough hard once and I'd hear a baby plop into the water. This reminds me of when they kept trying to have me pee during labor with DS1 (I kept myself fully hydrated, to say the least) but it hurt to labor on the toilet and I was miserable there.
Please tell me it's not just me.
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tngrl3
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Post by tngrl3 on Feb 6, 2019 6:39:09 GMT -6
strawberrykiki woke up thinking about you this morning. I hope you are snuggling your sweet baby right now or at least are getting very close!
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cch
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Post by cch on Feb 6, 2019 7:05:33 GMT -6
redhead610 Hope the formula switch helps DS3 gain some more weight and his tummy issues clear up. My DD was in the 5th-6th percentile for a while and didn’t come up to even 10th until she was around 6mo so I understand how tough it is to not worry about weight when you have a small baby but as long as he’s gaining that’s progress! Hope DS2 feels better soon! strawberrykiki Thinking of you! ETA thelittleredm The pressure is worse some days than others for me but getting out of bed at night to pee has been more difficult due to pelvic pain. And I’ve felt a lot of pressure when sitting on the toilet as well (mostly at night for whatever reason). I’m thinking it’s normal with baby being engaged and being this close to the end.
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k
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Post by k on Feb 6, 2019 7:28:20 GMT -6
TMI probably but.... It's so uncomfortable, borderline painful, to go to the bathroom. A is so low in my pelvis, it causes crazy amounts of pressure to sit on a toilet or anything similar. Like, I feel like I could cough hard once and I'd hear a baby plop into the water. This reminds me of when they kept trying to have me pee during labor with DS1 (I kept myself fully hydrated, to say the least) but it hurt to labor on the toilet and I was miserable there. Please tell me it's not just me. Yep I had the same thing.
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Post by sunshiney on Feb 6, 2019 7:43:43 GMT -6
thelittleredm getting up to pee at night is really ouchy on my pelvis (7 times last night ugh), I think because I'm not wearing my support brace at night. Sitting on the toilet isn't too bad for me yet but I could see that it could be because of relaxing/spreading when tucking everything in and up tightly is always helpful for relieving the pain! On a related note, is anyone's digestion going haywire? I've been so beautifully regular almost the entire pregnancy (a real miracle since I'm a Crohn's girl) but the last week it's just flipping between constipation and diarrhea. TMI WARNING -- a couple nights ago I was so uncomfortable, felt like I couldn't fully evacuate and get clean when wiping, and ended up using a finger to help clean out my bum in the shower... Didn't really think it through it just was such a relief I kept going... To my horror realized there was some actual plops of poop going down the drain and then was so afraid it would back up or smell or otherwise be noticeable but didn't tell DH and as far as I know he is blissfully unaware!!! Tell me I'm just a normal pregnant lady and not a freak lol?!
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Post by thelittleredm on Feb 6, 2019 8:09:40 GMT -6
sunshiney, I'm going to say that's not abnormal Lol I can barely reach to wipe now and it's so frustrating. I always make sure to take extra time in the shower because of it >.<
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hrh
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Post by hrh on Feb 6, 2019 8:33:09 GMT -6
strawberrykiki thinking of you this a.m. and hoping you're snuggling your little guy by now! Big hugs! redhead610 Hope everyone in your house has improved health today, it's hard when dealing with more than one kiddo being off!
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Post by notagoddess on Feb 6, 2019 9:02:19 GMT -6
+1 to recent poop troubles. I went from being regular to having diarrhea for the past week or two. Google said it's a hormone thing at the end of pregnancy? IDK.
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k
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Post by k on Feb 6, 2019 10:27:04 GMT -6
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Post by thelittleredm on Feb 6, 2019 10:41:28 GMT -6
38 week appointment today. It was with a midwife I haven't seen, yet, and was probably the fastest I've been in and out of there! Seriously. Walked in at 8:58 to check in, got back to my car at 9:17.
At least the pressure and contractions are doing something. I've progressed to a 4 and A is staying so low it's actually making my ute measure small a few weeks small. Didn't even know that was a thing but it makes sense. Midwife says she would be surprised if I made my due date so I kept my mouth shut about having a sweep done today lol I scared the nurse who checked my blood pressure because it was measuring in the 160s but she retook it and it was at 118 which is a bit elevated for me but normal.
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CharlieB
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Post by CharlieB on Feb 6, 2019 10:44:13 GMT -6
@amc Good luck today!! That gif is so perfect 😂 strawberrykiki Thinking of you! sunshiney I had to take colace twice daily in addition to fiber gummies for the last few weeks of pregnancy. It was so uncomfortable. thelittleredm That’s great progress for not even being in labor yet!! We’re battling the sleepies over here. B will wake up during his diaper change, get pissed and want to nurse, and then doze off after 5 minutes. Come on, kiddo. The pedi said he looked fantastic yesterday but wanted him back for a weight check today, so I’m hoping that he’s gained a bit in spite of him being so sleepy.
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tngrl3
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Post by tngrl3 on Feb 6, 2019 11:14:00 GMT -6
CharlieB we are in the same boat. Im also having to wake to feed most times, which goes against everything in me as I am very much team don't wake a sleeping baby. Hope the weight check goes well and he perks up soon.
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Post by notagoddess on Feb 6, 2019 11:15:09 GMT -6
I am really concerned about a long labor again and starting from zero like last time. I ended up getting Pitocin last time after being stuck at 4cm for hours (about 18 hours into labor). It got me full dilated within the hour. I'm going to talk to my OB about it on Friday, but does it make sense to ask for it earlier? Can I even get it before 4cm, which is the point at which my hospital admits women in labor? Does anyone have thoughts on this? I've been quite sick, not sleeping and zero energy and very nervous about a long and painful labor while in this state.
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Post by thelittleredm on Feb 6, 2019 11:19:50 GMT -6
notagoddess, I imagine they usually wait so that you aren't on it for an excessive amount of time? But I have no idea. Can't hurt to ask, though!
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hrh
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Post by hrh on Feb 6, 2019 14:19:56 GMT -6
notagoddess I would absolutely talk to them about your concerns and what options you have. Do you do a Foley bulb to start? I'd think they'd be amenable to helping you speed things up and there are different things they can do, it doesn't have to just be pitocin and wait. Never hurts to ask and advocate for the experience you want, at least the parts that are in your control!
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Post by notagoddess on Feb 6, 2019 14:29:15 GMT -6
hrh, I went into labor naturally last time so no Foley bulb. I had an OB appointment that morning and my cervix was completely closed, high and long. So when labor started, it just took a long time. I went in after having 5-1-1 contractions for 3 or 4 hours, and I was only at 1cm. It took another 10 hours to get to 4cm and my water breaking. Then I got stuck at 4 until the Pitocin. It was an overall good experience, but SO exhausting and painful. I had the shakes the whole time and threw up multiple times. I just don't feel like I have it in me right now to go through that again. I see my OB on Friday so I will bring this all up.
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cch
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Post by cch on Feb 6, 2019 15:40:55 GMT -6
Had my 38 week appointment today and am now 3cm. She’s still engaged at at 0 station and I’m still 70% effaced but making progress! Can’t believe we have an induction on the books and I’ll be holding our little girl in 9 days or less! Let the countdown begin! She doesn’t think I’ll make it till then but we’ll see. I’d love to go into labor on my own but am not opposed to being induced again especially with all the painful contractions I’ve been having lately 🤷🏼♀️
Any thoughts on membrane stripping? She asked if I want her to do it at my appointment next week (2 days before scheduled induction) but it was so painful when I had it done with DD and did nothing besides give me lots of contractions. I just don’t know if it’s worth it and also would prefer to not have her on Valentine’s Day if possible and the membrane sweep would be the day before if she did it. Decisions decisions.
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Post by thelittleredm on Feb 6, 2019 15:49:51 GMT -6
cch , How dilated were you the first time you had a membrane strip done? I was 2cm with DS1 and it was definitely painful. But I was 5cm with DS2 and barely felt that it was happening. It definitely led to cramping and some contractions but didn't seem as bad as it was the first time. I've heard the farther along you are dilation wise, the less pain you have when it's done which makes sense really; bigger area for your doctor to stick a finger or two through, the easier it goes since most of those nerves that are angry are attached to your cervix and not the uterine wall. Regardless, both boys came within 48 hours of said membrane strips. I plan on having mine done again if A hasn't shown up by my next appointment.
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cch
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Post by cch on Feb 6, 2019 16:01:56 GMT -6
thelittleredm that makes sense! I was only 1-2cm then so maybe it won’t be as bad this time if I choose to do it!
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hrh
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Post by hrh on Feb 6, 2019 16:11:47 GMT -6
notagoddess I see, yikes that is a long labor! It is exhausting. I would totally ask them to keep things moving along by whatever means possible. I felt that way with DS2 and had them break my water earlier than with DS1; I knew it would just wear me out to wait. I hope you have a better experience this time! cch I think it super depends on the doctor doing it, too; my sweep with DS1 at term did nothing. 🤷 But it also wasn't super uncomfortable after so it may have been really light compared to others.
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