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Post by thelittleredm on Nov 7, 2018 22:01:26 GMT -6
Came across this on Pinterest and it has me feeling all the feels 😭 I think I may have it printed for baby’s room since she will be our second and last. Could work for a third+ child as well with some words changed here and there. So sweet! Well on that note..... 😭😭😭😭😭😭 @amc, How do you have any candy left in your house??? I would have stress eaten all of it by now in your shoes.
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dashook
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Post by dashook on Nov 8, 2018 7:00:23 GMT -6
cch I’m still thinking about your baby shower post and the thing I keep coming back to (which I think another PP brought up) is what does your SIL think about all this? Especially since she’s having another shower from her mom, it seems excessive and also weird. Like if I were her I would not be excited about them throwing some blue cookies into your pink shower and would feel like I was encroaching.
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CharlieB
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Post by CharlieB on Nov 8, 2018 7:30:25 GMT -6
cch I’m still thinking about your baby shower post and the thing I keep coming back to (which I think another PP brought up) is what does your SIL think about all this? Especially since she’s having another shower from her mom, it seems excessive and also weird. Like if I were her I would not be excited about them throwing some blue cookies into your pink shower and would feel like I was encroaching. This was my thought, too. I wonder if she’s thought about your feelings or if she’s feeling awkward and didn’t really know how to stop the wheels once they were in motion. Either way, that’s an uncomfortable situation for you and I’m sorry that it’s happening. 👎
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CharlieB
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Post by CharlieB on Nov 8, 2018 7:32:07 GMT -6
dashook I’m so sorry for the added complications and stress. Especially after you took the leap of making huge life changes to manage the stress and BP...that is very unfair, universe. Hugs, friend.
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CharlieB
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Post by CharlieB on Nov 8, 2018 7:42:25 GMT -6
I’ve been kind of MIA lately...work continues to be nuts, and we bought a house! It’s seriously the best feeling to know that this is home and that a lifetime of hard work is paying off.
So now we’re unpacking and I’m finally starting to work through my list of things to purchase for this LO. DS is still in his crib because he’s a wild thing and I love sleep, but I’m trying to decide if we should move him into a bed so that we can forego having to buy another crib. We might convert to a toddler bed to start just to get a feel for how he might manage.
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cch
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Post by cch on Nov 8, 2018 7:44:31 GMT -6
dashook wow. I am so sorry you’re dealing with all of this. I can imagine it’s super stressful dragging the kids to your appointments on the days you don’t have help. Hopefully they will figure out when to do surgery ASAP so you at least know. I guess it’s a good thing LO is measuring 3 weeks ahead incase you end up going early with all the complications? Regardless, you have a lot on your plate and I really hope everything works out and you and baby are both healthy at the end of this journey. ((Hugs))
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cch
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Post by cch on Nov 8, 2018 7:51:08 GMT -6
Foxy his family is weird. They like to avoid any confrontation and just don’t talk about things- complete opposite of my family. I got the baby shower invite in the mail yesterday and it shows SIL as a cohost too. I knew she was planning to help (which I thought was weird when MIL told me bc we’re not very close and rarely talk) but I didn’t realize she’d be an official cohost on the invites and all. Honestly makes it even weirder IMO. None of her friends and family will be there, just my family and friends and a few of MILs neighbors/friends and her sister. So those few ladies will be the ones who gets a note saying to not forget about SIL in their invites. That is weird to me bc it’s my day and etiquette-wise I think it’s rude to bring gifts to a shower for someone other than the person of honor but I ultimately understand she needs boy things and was okay with that. It was the blue cookies that really upset me bc why does that even need to be a thing? Pregnant women can go to baby showers without also being honored there. Especially when she’s already had a handful of baby showers and her mother is already planning the next one. This is my second and last shower ever. It’d be nice to have the day to myself 🤷🏼♀️
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cch
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Post by cch on Nov 8, 2018 7:59:53 GMT -6
dashook CharlieB I wish I knew how SIL felt about it. If I were her I would absolutely say no to the blue cookies and as far as the note in MILs friends invites, I’d probably say no to that as well since it’s baby #3 and just send those ladies a birth announcement instead. I am taking DD to go visit SIL and her two girls next week... we’ve only done this two other times in the past 3 years but since we’re both pregnant and the girls never get to play we figured it’d be fun so maybe I’ll talk to her about it then? It’s been on my mind too and I think I may call MIL to thank her for the invite and casually bring up that I’d rather her not put blue cookies out for SIL since she is having another shower and this should be my day? Sigh
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dashook
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Post by dashook on Nov 8, 2018 8:50:30 GMT -6
CharlieB congratulations on the house!! cch okay sorry now it’s even more of a wtf. She’s co-hosting but MIL wants to co-honor her at the shower? Whaaa? I’m sorry you have to deal with this extra level of drama. I wish you could just enjoy your day and that the onus wouldn’t be on you to have to bring this up with your MIL.
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dashook
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Post by dashook on Nov 8, 2018 8:52:25 GMT -6
dashook I’m so sorry for the added complications and stress. Especially after you took the leap of making huge life changes to manage the stress and BP...that is very unfair, universe. Hugs, friend. I’m happier than ever about the decision I made to stop working. And it did help the blood pressure at least! Mostly I can’t even imagine trying to coordinate all of these appointments around my litigation calendar, or having my cases on my mind in addition to everything else. And LOL to how my firm would have approached me taking so much time away.
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cch
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Post by cch on Nov 8, 2018 9:09:42 GMT -6
CharlieB Congrats on the new house! So excited for you! dashook I decided to call MIL after my last post and thanked her for putting together a beautiful baby shower invitation and told her instead of me feeling weird about the SIL situation that I’d prefer to talk with her about it. I let her know that I’m okay with the notes going in her friends invites (they already went out anyways so no need to fuss about that) but that I’d prefer if we didn’t do blue cookies for SIL since I think it’d be confusing for my guests and would like it if I could have this day to myself. She seemed to understand and said she won’t do the blue cookies. Whew.
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cch
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Post by cch on Nov 8, 2018 10:18:53 GMT -6
@amc woohoo!! That’s great news!
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Foxy
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Post by Foxy on Nov 8, 2018 10:29:42 GMT -6
I think my work is going to pay for my employee portion of my health insurance while i'm maternity leave. It was so so hard to ask for but my manager is awesome. He was like i'm going to do everything I can to get it covered, one way or another. I think I might also be getting a raise!
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dashook
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Post by dashook on Nov 8, 2018 12:26:09 GMT -6
cch I’m glad your MIL seemed to get it! That must be a relief. @amc great news about the move! Foxy your manager sounds awesome.
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hrh
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Post by hrh on Nov 8, 2018 14:18:13 GMT -6
dashook I'm so sorry you're dealing with all the health issues. I'm glad you can be at home and things are holding steady for now, and hope you can find comfort in knowing you'll have all the resources you'll need for baby by delivering in Boston. Be kind to yourself, do what you need to do and definitely ask for help.b❤️ cch she's a co-host now?! Omg. Yeah no. Glad your MIL is somewhat able to understand. 🙄 @amc yay for the move update! Same to you CharlieB!
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Post by thelittleredm on Nov 8, 2018 16:35:48 GMT -6
Such great updates I'm seeing!
I had a complete sobbing breakdown Monday night. I had casually checked out a corgi breeder I'd seen pop up on Facebook recommendations several times. I sent her a message just getting some background info, pricing, etc. I made it very clear that I wasn't looking for a new pup, not for a good while anyway, not with a baby on the way. Anyway, she breeds exactly what my dream corgi pup has always been and it was nice to find someone relatively close that isn't mixing them with cattle dogs or Aussies/mini Aussies. So, I relay all this info to H and as soon as he hears the price tag (which is higher but still normal), he says no, that I can get something cheaper elsewhere.
Let me start by saying, he was just telling me two nights before that he will probably end up bringing a new dog home from his work at some point in the near-ish future because he deals with a lot of rescues and strays. I like dogs, but I'm not a general dog lover in the sense that dog type doesn't matter to me. I choose corgis over all else for a reason. They match really well with my personality and what I'm looking for in a dog partner. He knows this type of pup has been my dream for forever and we both know 2 dogs is our ideal and we already have his dog.
I almost cried right there but we were at a party so I kept it together until I got home and could be alone. It's so petty and selfish, but I feel like the next time we are ready for another dog, it should ultimately be my decision because our corgis who passed this summer were mine whereas his dog is as alive as ever.
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Post by strawberrykiki on Nov 8, 2018 16:50:35 GMT -6
thelittleredm you should get to choose for sure! Was it a breeder you spoke with? How about a corgi specific rescue? They might be cheaper and the money goes for helping other dogs. Just a thought! dashook so sorry for all you’re dealing with. That’s really a lot! Hugs!!
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dashook
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Post by dashook on Nov 8, 2018 17:18:31 GMT -6
thelittleredm hugs! It does seem fair that the next dog should be yours to choose.
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cch
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Post by cch on Nov 8, 2018 17:34:46 GMT -6
thelittleredm hugs lady. That’s a bit insensitive of him to strait up tell you no. Considering your two pups passed recently and his is still living I think you absolutely have the right to choose this time. Adopting/buying a dog is usually a long term commitment so him bringing home any dog doesn’t seem smart if you have your heart set on a Corgi. I agree with strawberrykiki that a corgi specific rescue could work out for you if money is a big factor. Maybe you could look into it and if no rescues in your area have your perfect pup by the time you’re seriously ready for another dog you can revisit the idea of going with the breeder you found. If she breeds your dream dog and nothing else works out I think spending a little extra for a dog you’re comfortable with and will love for years and years is 100% worth it.
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Post by thelittleredm on Nov 8, 2018 18:38:50 GMT -6
strawberrykiki, I've looked into corgi rescues (follow a couple via Facebook). Unfortunately, there are none in our state so we would be tacking on travel expenses to the adoption fee and a lot of the ones that I have found either rarely have their dogs for long because Corgis are popular enough to get picked up really quickly or they won't adopt to people out of state. It's a bit frustrating but is what it is. My dream corgi (blue merle Cardigan x Pembroke but more Pem than Cardigan because size and fluff) is a rarity in the rescue world. Most rescue corgis are straight Pem or mixed with other breeds. Which again, does not make them less awesome. Just, not quite what I'm looking for. Plus, most rescue fees barely cover the cost of the dog you're adopting after medical expenses and what not. The vast majority of the money to help their dogs has to come via donations which is something I'd rather give since again, corgis tend not to spend much time in rescue because of their popularity. My idea was to get H on the same page as me so we could slowly put money aside so when we were ready, there wouldn't be a money problem.
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Post by redhead610 on Nov 8, 2018 19:13:38 GMT -6
So many new babies on Nov/Dec '18! I get so excited for them every time I go lurking there... which is often-ish. 😉 Only about another month until our earliest EDDs here will be early term (37 weeks), so it'll be our turn for babies before we know it! I know! I technically belong on that board (due 12/30) but with 2 month windows, I knew I'd likely deliver more in line with this group. Both ds1 &2 were born 3 days early, which puts me at exactly 7 weeks from today. That seems so close, yet so far away.
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Post by sunshiney on Nov 8, 2018 20:34:52 GMT -6
thelittleredm in no way us that either petty or selfish. When you feel ready for a calm conversation, maybe ask to discuss both of your emotions surrounding it. He may be thinking of the lost dogs and the money that was spent on them, for example, or wanting desperately to replace them and deal with the pain by rescuing a dog to love earlier rather than later. I would guess that if there's room for him to explain where he's coming from without judgment, then he would be better able to hear you and understand your need here? Regardless, hugs!!! No one should ever have to go through what you did with your fur babies and I hope you are able to have your dream dog.
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dashook
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Post by dashook on Nov 8, 2018 21:26:08 GMT -6
So many new babies on Nov/Dec '18! I get so excited for them every time I go lurking there... which is often-ish. 😉 Only about another month until our earliest EDDs here will be early term (37 weeks), so it'll be our turn for babies before we know it! Ooh I should go lurk! I love me some birth stories (please tell me there’s birth stories). No one has said anything about it but with all my health issues I would be very surprised if I made it to 40 or even 39 weeks. Now that I have to deliver in Boston (which is far and there are soooo many issues with parking and traffic) I’m even considering asking for an induction date to eliminate some of the stress I’m feeling over the unknown. If I were induced at 37 weeks, that would be 8 weeks from tomorrow 😳
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CharlieB
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Post by CharlieB on Nov 8, 2018 21:34:23 GMT -6
@amc Great news!! Foxy That’s seriously awesome about the raise and the health insurance! thelittleredm Oof. That is rough. Maybe it’s something that you guys can talk about more. I think it would be a bit unreasonable for him to just completely dismiss your wishes from the get-go, especially when considering what you’ve been through and that it’s a long-term savings goal.
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hrh
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Post by hrh on Nov 10, 2018 9:34:10 GMT -6
thelittleredm hugs. Sometimes I find with my DH that he doesn't understand just how important something is to me, so he just dismisses it and doesn't realize that dismissal is incredibly hurtful. Most recently it was my frustration with still having a few pieces of really shitty college furniture in our house. It won't cost that much to get some nicer pieces and it really bothers me to think our kids will remember this crappy stuff. To DH, it was just money we don't need to spend so he vetoed. I got upset and explained why I felt so strongly. He understands now and we are going forward. What is obvious to me is definitely not to him, so be sure to explain how you feel. ❤️ What you explained to us makes perfect sense and you're being reasonable about saving, etc. GL!
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Post by thelittleredm on Nov 10, 2018 17:01:25 GMT -6
I had to work today and my legs feel like death. Normally, Saturdays are boring and long so I wore some heeled boots and guys, it was not a slow day. It didn't calm down until noon. My calves and feet are so sore and crampy and I had nothing to prop my legs up on while there. Work sucks. I'm over it.
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TashaLa
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Post by TashaLa on Nov 10, 2018 20:30:36 GMT -6
Just catching up on this week. dashook sorry your dealing with all that, I can only imagine I was peeking at the Nov/Dec board but had a harder time than I anticipated. I had a MC earlier this year, and would’ve been due then. I am so grateful for this healthy pregnancy but still find myself feeling a missing piece.
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dashook
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Post by dashook on Nov 11, 2018 6:53:37 GMT -6
Hugs TashaLa. That can’t be easy. IME that little piece is always missing, no matter how happy you feel about the baby you’re growing now. Just know you aren’t alone ❤️
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dashook
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Post by dashook on Nov 11, 2018 7:02:40 GMT -6
I had a sprinkle last night from my friends (actually it was a co-sprinkle for me and our other friend who is due 1/5 with her second!). It was so much fun! Nothing fancy, we just went out to dinner at this cute nearby gastropub. They gave me a GC for 4 hours of PP doula care, which I’m super excited about!
I met these ladies in a group for new moms run by my hospital, in early 2015 when we all had just had our first babies and were collectively miserable, exhausted, and scared lol. Now between the 9 of us we have 15 kids with 4 on the way 😱 It’s crazy how much life can change in a few short years.
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hrh
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Post by hrh on Nov 11, 2018 8:51:58 GMT -6
dashook glad you had that this weekend, it sounds lovely! TashaLa hugs, I'm sorry. Ditto here, was due end of December. ❤️
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