TTMA Showers

[Rama]

So showers are starting to come up in my circle.  I know I don't want to have one before the holidays (oh god, please, no competing with Christmas) and that typically they're done around/after 30ish weeks.

A friend has offered (I think...she was vague) and my mom/sister might also throw me one (which is pretty standard for our culture/the area, so whatev).  I have made no moves on pushing for a shower, these are what were offered to me (because, hey, I'm awkward and shizz).

So I guess my question really is, when is a good time to look at having a shower?  Mid-January (I'll be 30w on 1/19)?  Should I wait until Feb?  If all goes according to plan with babe and MFM, we're looking to deliver around early- to mid-March (3/9-3/23) and I want to make sure we have enough time to get all our shit together before this kid is supposed to be here.

[smootiepie]

I had mine around 31 wks, which I think ended up being pretty good timing. Gave me enough time to go through everything we were gifted and figure out what I still wanted to have before baby was born (which ended up being 10 days before my EDD).

[calendula]

I think 28-32 weeks is the sweet spot. You need time to get the nursery set up and also don't want to look like a whale in pictures. Also, babies can and do arrive early, even when we don't want them to, and you want to pad some time in to allow for that.

Also you're not awkward for waiting for someone to host a shower in your honor...that doesn't make you awkward, it makes you polite. All you are really allowed to do is help pick a date, provide a guest list, and make a registry. Its nice that your friend, mom and sister are thinking of you! So fun.

[ArielMermaid]

It is typical here to do it about a month before your due date.

[Rama]

Nov 13, 2017 12:04:16 GMT -6 calendula said:

I think 28-32 weeks is the sweet spot. You need time to get the nursery set up and also don't want to look like a whale in pictures. Also, babies can and do arrive early, even when we don't want them to, and you want to pad some time in to allow for that.

Also you're not awkward for waiting for someone to host a shower in your honor...that doesn't make you awkward, it makes you polite. All you are really allowed to do is help pick a date, provide a guest list, and make a registry. Its nice that your friend, mom and sister are thinking of you! So fun.

I only say I'm awkward because I'm so dodgy about it, hahaha.  Like, here was my conversation with friend:

Friend: Btw do you have a baby shower date / place yet?
Me: Not yet
F: You want to have one, yes?
M: If someone offered, I'd probably say yeah, but I'm not really comfortable asking for one D:
F: You crazy lady. But you're pregnant so you get a pass on the crazy bit.
F: Well I certainly want you to have one and wanna do the things and things.
M: You're a dork and I love you
M: If you are offering, and that is *not* an obligation to say you are, then I accept gratefully.

[nuggetrn]

I think 30 weeks is totally reasonable. That seems to be what I typically see for people having their showers. Hopefully you will still be comfortable and it should give you plenty of time even if babe decides to come a bit early.

I am having the competing with Christmas concerns as well. And also not wanting to be pushy about showers/letting people offer, blah blah. Which has resulted in two showers being planned at 34 and 36 weeks which makes me super nervous. Please God let this baby stay inside of me til term because I may not have anything otherwise.

[whatsit]

Fwiw- we were team green with G and waited until after he was born to have a shower. This gave family/friends a chance to meet him and know the sex when they were gifting. He was about a month old?

I know a lot of people have moved away from this though because you tend to get the big gifts at the shower before the baby’s born. But I like the idea of baby cuddles at a baby shower. Lol

[auri]

I ended up with two showers. My mom and sister had one for me back home in Va, and I was 30 weeks. My other one was hosted by one of DH's cousins in Tn...I think I might have been 32 or 33 weeks. Mid Jan sounds like a perfect time to have a shower to me...that way everyone has a little time to recover from the holidays.

[nuggetrn]

Nov 13, 2017 12:27:47 GMT -6 whatsit said:

Fwiw- we were team green with G and waited until after he was born to have a shower. This gave family/friends a chance to meet him and know the sex when they were gifting. He was about a month old?

I know a lot of people have moved away from this though because you tend to get the big gifts at the shower before the baby’s born. But I like the idea of baby cuddles at a baby shower. Lol

MIL suggested this to me and I am just unable to get on board with it. The thought of brand new mom me having to be presentable to a room full of people who want to pass my baby around...

I am fairly laid back but I have no idea where my emotions will be at that point and I just can't.

[Leaf 🌱]

We had a coed shower for our team green DD around 34 weeks i think? It was great bc we got a lot of gear and not a lot of clothes.

[cornpop]

My shower was 3 weeks before my due date and I was so mad about it! I felt like I had to scramble to get everything done afterwards.

I think 6w-1 month before when you think you'll have the baby is good.

[yianna]

I've been extremely blessed and have had a shower for each kiddo - unsolicited by me, insisted on by my friends.

Each shower has happened between 32w and 34w.

I would definitely say, have it done by 34w. You get so much stuff to sort through, that you'll need to exchange, or return, and the later you are in having it, the harder it is to get all that done.


I'll most likely decline any insists on a shower this time, and will do a welcome baby sprinkle sometime in May. Maybe the weekend she's baptized.

[sweetc129]

With my first my shower was thrown by my sister when I was 32 weeks. It was perfect timing. It was early enough to get things ready and fill in what we still needed, far enough along that we were comfortable but not so far enough along that I was physically uncomfortable.

[cp3]

With DD1 I had my shower about 6 weeks before my due date. She came a week early but I still felt like I had enough to wash clothes and blankets we were gifted and getting everything ready for her arrival.

My mom, sister, and MIL threw my shower.

My family loves parties so my mom will want to throw one this time around. I feel a bit awkard about it and we don't really need anything since we are pretty set from DD1.

[mrsmonogrammed]

My shower was when I was 33.5w. She was born at 38+6 and it was a prefect amount of time to make returns/get everythig set up!

[ovenrack]

My showers (one for each side of the family) were at 36 and 38 weeks. It felt too late. Lol.

[katietopaz]

I agree with PPs that around 30-34w is a nice window. I had one shower at 29w (I think?) since I had to fly cross-country and was nervous about doing that much later. My other shower was at 34w and I'm glad it wasn't later.

[clementine]

I’ll be 35 weeks for one of my showers at the end of Jan. I’m hoping MH’s family can schedule their shower earlier in Jan, because I really don’t want to be traveling 3 hours to their hometown at 36 weeks or after.

[mattsgirl2004]

I agree with PP's, that 28-34 weeks is about ideal.

I won't be having a shower this time (didn't last time either). He will be my hopefully 4th take-home baby. So, I don't feel right about it. Last time though, my mom and a few close friends and family members got together and we went out to eat and went shopping as a way to celebrate the upcoming arrival of DD2. If it's offered this time, I'd be okay with doing the same again.

[woodenshoes]

I had two showers before DS was born. One was at work and the other was thrown by my mom and sister. I know my family shower was around 32 weeks. My work shower was either a couple weeks before or after it, I can’t remember. I had a small shower with my husband’s side of the family about a month after DS was born when my ILs were in town for Christmas.

[Leaf 🌱]

I already told work no shower. It’s a hard no for me bc it makes me really uncomfortable. I said I’ll bring the baby in and we can do a donuts/coffee thing. Anything beyond that

[alwayscheese]

My BFFs and I agreed they would do my shower in January, so I'll be 31-34 weeks. It'll pry be toward the end since they are both due in the next month here and will have infants still.

[kayladawn91]

My mom is looking to throw mine in early February when I'm 33-34 weeks. Around here, 30-34 is pretty typical for baby showers.