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Post by sheilathetank on Oct 23, 2017 10:21:56 GMT -6
In the three weeks K's been in the toddler room she's bitten other kids twice and been bitten once. This is on top of all the other scrapes, bruises, and bumps she comes home with.
I talked with her teacher after the first time because mh was concerned about the compounding incidents. She informed me that they have seen an uptick in biting and she spoke with the director about it. They cancelled art activity the day before to focus on playing and redirection. She says they talk about not biting, gentle hands etc. Everyday at circle time.
Since DC is doing as much as they can, what can I do at home? K sometimes play bites and we give her a warning and then a time out for one minute if she does it again. However, what's happening at school is in response to another child taking a toy or something of that nature so it's not exactly the same. I thought of getting the teeth aren't for biting book but I wondered if she was too young to understand it.
Also, side note, why the fuck are toddlers so violent? Half of her Halloween party was spent keeping all the kids from beating eachother up. Their like cute little feral animals.
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Biting
Oct 23, 2017 11:11:50 GMT -6
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Post by billyhorrible on Oct 23, 2017 11:11:50 GMT -6
Also, side note, why the fuck are toddlers so violent? Half of her Halloween party was spent keeping all the kids from beating eachother up. Their like cute little feral animals. Because their vocabulary (actual and emotional) is limited. So biting isn't a good thing, but normal. I would just consistently reinforce at home. I don't do time out for the kid, I do a timeout for me. "I'm not going to play with someone who bites me." I also give words to use. I tell BH that instead of biting/ hitting/ kicking he should yell "I'm angry!" Which has a similar satisfactory feeling for him. It also brings attention to him so a teacher can intervene before there is a physical response.
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budders
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Post by budders on Oct 23, 2017 11:13:28 GMT -6
We went through this with V back in the spring. I was anxious everyday for a while, because he was the perpetrator. He’s in a multiagedaycare though, so the other kids had grown out of it by then.
It’s good to hear that daycare is on top of it. At home, we used a stern no (and moved away from him if he was persistent) and tried to reinforce appropriate things to bite: pacifiers, chew toys, food. We also worked really hard on the concept of “gentle touches”, which has helped now that we are in a hitting/kicking phase 🙄.
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jillywilly
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Post by jillywilly on Oct 23, 2017 18:28:27 GMT -6
We went through this with DS over the summer. Really bad, actually. I 100% recommend the teeth are not for biting book, and talking about biting. I think kids understand a lot more than we think, even if they can't vocalize their thoughts back out. So we read the book, talked about it, and as billyhorrible suggested, gave alternate forms of expression. We did two parts: first we gave him one of those banana toothbrushes that he took to school, and told him he could use that to bite of his teeth hurt or he felt upset. Secondly, we told him to yell for a teacher for help, and kept reinforcing that. I still remember picking him up one day and his teacher was so happy to report that when a friend took his toy on the playground, DS stood there and shouted "Miss K! Nooooooooo!" And then when she came told her "that mine." It took a while, but once he found those words, the biting ended quickly and he hasn't done it again since.
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Radley
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Post by Radley on Oct 23, 2017 21:47:02 GMT -6
Wow weird timing. DS2 just randomly decided to use his teeth on DS1 today because he was mad that A was laying on the side of the bed that he wanted to lay on. He bit A so hard that he drew blood! I was shocked and just pulled R away from A and sat him on the floor while saying “no, no biting” and then tended to A with cuddles and neosporin. A wasn’t much of a biter and he wasn’t really around other small children when he was 2, so yeah I was lost. All that to say, I have no advice but I sympathize!
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Biting
Oct 24, 2017 9:06:26 GMT -6
Post by sheilathetank on Oct 24, 2017 9:06:26 GMT -6
Thanks for the advice guys. Sorry for the post and run. Yesterday got away from me and then I dealt with a pukey toddler last night. I finally have a chance to sit down and reply. billyhorrible, we do the Daniel Tiger "mad song" sometimes. We could be more consistent though. I definitely think it's a language thing along with observing other kids, since it's not just her doing it. budders, they took away the binkie at school and we only use it for naps or long car rides. I think that's helped contribute to the issue. I'm also concerned that it will become a problem with DC if it continues. They haven't indicated that, but it still spurs my anxiety. jillywilly, how old is your DS? The teeth aren't for biting book is in my amazon cart. How often did you guys read it? I wonder if I should get a copy for school too.
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jillywilly
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Biting
Oct 24, 2017 10:08:27 GMT -6
Post by jillywilly on Oct 24, 2017 10:08:27 GMT -6
Thanks for the advice guys. Sorry for the post and run. Yesterday got away from me and then I dealt with a pukey toddler last night. I finally have a chance to sit down and reply. billyhorrible , we do the Daniel Tiger "mad song" sometimes. We could be more consistent though. I definitely think it's a language thing along with observing other kids, since it's not just her doing it. budders , they took away the binkie at school and we only use it for naps or long car rides. I think that's helped contribute to the issue. I'm also concerned that it will become a problem with DC if it continues. They haven't indicated that, but it still spurs my anxiety. jillywilly , how old is your DS? The teeth aren't for biting book is in my amazon cart. How often did you guys read it? I wonder if I should get a copy for school too. DS is 2 years 4 months now, the biting phase was right around his second birthday - it started when he was in toddlers, and then they moved him to twaddlers (2 year olds) just a little early actually because they thought part of it was that he was bored. He only goes to day care two days a week, but we read that book a lot, probably slipped it into the rotation most days. And talked about biting and what to do instead a lot. Daily, even on days he didn't go to school so the concept stuck in his head. I really think the most helpful was when we really started to be clear about what were acceptable alternatives to the biting. We only had the one copy at home, I'm not sure if day care had any other books about not biting, but we always made sure to talk about it as we read and translate the situations they show in the book to what he can/can't do at school. I would totally buy it - it's not a miracle fix, but it was definitely a helpful tool to discussing it in ways he could understand.
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budders
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Biting
Oct 24, 2017 18:03:25 GMT -6
Post by budders on Oct 24, 2017 18:03:25 GMT -6
Thanks for the advice guys. Sorry for the post and run. Yesterday got away from me and then I dealt with a pukey toddler last night. I finally have a chance to sit down and reply. billyhorrible , we do the Daniel Tiger "mad song" sometimes. We could be more consistent though. I definitely think it's a language thing along with observing other kids, since it's not just her doing it. budders , they took away the binkie at school and we only use it for naps or long car rides. I think that's helped contribute to the issue. I'm also concerned that it will become a problem with DC if it continues. They haven't indicated that, but it still spurs my anxiety. jillywilly , how old is your DS? The teeth aren't for biting book is in my amazon cart. How often did you guys read it? I wonder if I should get a copy for school too. Gotcha. We kept the pacifier until we were out of that phase, and then ditched it around 2 when he had all of his teeth.
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