TMYO about sleepovers

[stringy]

That's "tell me your opinions about..."


When are they something you'd do with family/cousins/grandparents? Under what circumstances?

With friends?

General thoughts?

[ovenrack]

Asap. If I had anyone who'd offer, I'd already do it. Basically as soon as they don't need to nurse during that allotted time.

[brandiewine11]

I'd be fine with r spending the night at a couple of close friends. When we visited my in laws last year he slept at their house without us for 3 nights.

[rugger]

R just had her first real sleepover at her cousin's house a couple weeks ago. She's 5. Before that, she wasn't ready to not have one of us there for bedtime/at night. Her decision.
We tried one at her grandparents a few years ago, but that was a big bust thanks to FIL being stubborn about where she slept.

Also, hubs and I don't really want to be away from them for more than a night. And S really doesn't want to be more than an easy car ride away. So no adult only vacations anytime soon.

As for friends, I'd prob wait until they're at least 7-8.

[charlotte]

DS had his first night(s) away from us a couple of weeks ago, with my mom. There really isn't anyone else in our families that I would allow him to stay overnight with right now. He knows her the best by far, since she is the only family we see more then 1-2x/year.

Friend sleepovers will be kid-dependent. Depending on both my child and the child/family inviting him to sleep over. Age-wise, maybe 3rd grade?

[critter015]

My kids all started sleeping over at MIL's once they were done nursing. (C might have been a little older though) We tried to have O stay once at 10 months so DH and I could go to a wedding, but he refused to take the bottle so I went and got him as soon as it was over. I would let them stay at my parents house and also with several of my cousins at this point if we didn't live so far away. I'm not sure about staying with friends. There are several friends from church I would trust with my kids overnight, but there definitely are people I would not trust with them.

[milano]

We don't have any family closer than 2.5 hrs away, and we never have had that so I'm not sure what I'd do if it was an easy option for the kids to stay at their grandparents on a random night.

I first left J overnight at somewhere other than my house when he was almost 2 and MH and I went on a work trip to Hawaii. He stayed with my parents. Before that I'd only left him at home with MH when I traveled for work 3-4 times a year.

M hasn't stayed anywhere other than home overnight without me, although we did have grandparents come stay with them last month when MH and I went away for a long weekend. And I would have never left her anywhere other than our house.

I have so much anxiety about leaving them, but if they're going to be at my house I feel better because I know that everything they need is there. If my parents lived up the road from me then I probably be comfortable with J staying there randomly now that he's 3. He's a totally chill kid though when it comes to us being gone, he loves my mom so is super happy to be there with her. I feel more comfortable with them with my mom because she knows all my parenting preferences and follows them. My IL's are great but they just have a different mindset.

Sleepovers with friends...oy. I'm anxious about that already. I probably won't let him sleep anywhere until he's like third grade, maybe older. Maybe never. Lol. It depends on how will I know the parents. Like two of my best girlfriends in real life have boys the same age as J, and I would trust them with either of my kids overnight starting now. But random kids he meets at school, that's going to be years and years before I'm ok with it.

[milano]

Well that was long.

[Dramaphile]

milano we're in the same position, no relatives close by who we would want to leave Nugget with overnight. My ILs live about 3 hours away, and maybe when she's bigger we would be ok with her staying with them for a few days, but not till she's maybe 3 or 4. If they came to stay at our house, maybe when she's 2? They don't see her that often, so I'd want to make sure she was really comfortable before we did that. My parents live across the country, so it's unlikely we would leave her with them for overnight (unless maybe we come to visit and then went off for a weekend by ourselves?)

The only person currently I would feel comfortable leaving her overnight with is my best friend, who lives 10 minutes away and has two kids of her own. I wouldn't burden her with a toddler at this point, though, she has an 8 month old and a three year old. More than likely she will be the one to take Nugget overnight when we eventually have baby #2 (which probably won't be till Nugget is closer to 3). We'll definitely have sleepovers for our girls when they are older. I'm sure my thoughts will change as she gets older (or not).

[nikkipal]

M didn't stay ON with anyone until she was 2. She stayed with my dad and SM for one night. Then a couple of one or 2 night stays with my mom. Earlier this year, she stayed with my mom and them my in laws for a total of nine days, which was crazy. It's a long story, but she mostly did fine. It's good to know we have that kind of support in an emergency, but I wouldn't leave her for that long voluntarily.

[CurlieWhirlie]

E has had sleepovers at his grandparents' house or with cousins, maybe starting around age 5? He hasn't had a sleepover with friends yet but he's so ready (8 next weekend).

M hasn't slept away from us yet, but he's only 3.

[chickypoo2468]

I let S spend the night at friends', but when one of her friends had an adult male and his family living their as well (her foster parents son) I wouldn't let her stay there. Too many people not enough eyes watching out for my kid.
My other kids have only spent the night with family. I just go by them- if they want to and feel ready I let them. But it's rare still.
J stayed at MILs and still talks about how much he missed me and wanted to come home so that's not happening again unless it needs to bc of an emergency.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[chickypoo2468]

Oh. And the friends are either neighbors or one friend that I'm friends with the family. No one from school has asked.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[sherminator]

J spent almost every night with my Mom during his early years. ( I work overnights) But now that SO is living with us, he goes still once a week (Fridays) to my Moms. Hes had the occasional overnight when still in an overnight diaper with trusted friends/kids when coverage was unavoidable. I have 2 close friends who act as aunts to him, one lives about 90 minutes away- so occasionally like once a summer he stays over. Hes been asking about staying over at Auntie Kathleen's house, and I imagine he will soon. I would never let him stay with kids whose parents I didn't know well. He'll be 7 shortly. Hes been asking about staying over with one particular friend. Maybe her, I've known her parents since he was 2 1/2. To be really honest, these are all same sex couples (women), or people Ive known for decades.