Speedy
Sapphire
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Post by Speedy on Aug 1, 2017 8:14:19 GMT -6
The Trying to Conceive After a Loss thread is posted once a week (generally on Tuesday) for those of us who have unfortunately experienced a loss. No matter what type of loss you've experienced, from miscarriage to stillbirth to the loss of a child, it is heartbreaking. This thread is to help us commiserate, get support, and to try to navigate trying to conceive, after a loss, every week.
Out of respect to all the ladies here, please add a trigger warning if you decide to talk about any living children and please hide your signature if it contains pictures or tickers of babies or children. We also kindly ask for grads to refrain from commenting in this thread.
If you get a BFP, kindly either spoiler alert it or do not post it here at all.
**If this is your first check-in, and you would like to provide a gtky loss history intro go for it. If not, no worries!**
How are you doing?
Status (TTA, TTC, Benched):
Diagnosis (if applicable):
Updates/questions:
Debbie downer (a place to vent ) :
QOTW :
Any big plans for August?
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Speedy
Sapphire
Posts: 4,613 Likes: 8,575
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Post by Speedy on Aug 1, 2017 11:58:43 GMT -6
How are you doing? Good, pretty sore right now though. Status (TTA, TTC, Benched): Benched Diagnosis (if applicable): RPL Updates/questions: Well, my tooth surgery finally happened, yippee! That's like the last big thing down. It happened on Friday, so I'm still pretty sore from the wisdom teeth being removed, and I'm still getting used to my new plate, but I feel like I had an almost immediate boost to my self esteem =) Also, I'm getting a new kitten this weekend!! My best friend reposted a post from her cousin about a litter they had that they needed a home for because they've got a large population boost up where they are. I've been sort of looking at getting a cat for a while now, and when I saw these babies, I knew I needed one ^^ My best friend is going to go up this weekend anyways, so she's going to bring my baby home for me. I can't wait! Debbie downer (a place to vent ) : TW OPP {Spoiler}Lots and lots of ultrasound pictures cluttering up my facebook these days =/ QOTW : Any big plans for August? Welll, August 14 I get to call and make the appointment to get my IUD out, yay! Also, continuing planning for my 30th birthday party. This is going to be craaaazy! |
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Radley
Sapphire
Posts: 3,273 Likes: 13,750
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Post by Radley on Aug 2, 2017 7:22:22 GMT -6
Speedy whoooo! I'm really glad the surgery is over and for the self esteem boost. I hope the soreness goes away soon. I'm such a wimp about mouth pain. ***TW OPP** two people close to me are pregnant and several others that I just know. It's incredibly hard and frustrating. I hope that you feel better soon and get a break from all those photos
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Radley
Sapphire
Posts: 3,273 Likes: 13,750
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Post by Radley on Aug 2, 2017 7:29:30 GMT -6
How are you doing? Very blah and unmotivated. Status (TTA, TTC, Benched): Benched. Diagnosis (if applicable): PID, liver disease, enlarged spleen. Updates/questions: 7 months to go until I can go back and see the doctor about progress in my health. I REALLY need to get on the ball with eating better because that the only thing that will significantly help. Debbie downer (a place to vent ) : **TW LC** I feel done. I feel like saying screw it, we already have two. I feel selfish for being upset that we may never have a 3rd when some people may never have a first. I'm tired of health problems, I'm tired of everything. It's so overwhelming. QOTW : Any big plans for August? I have a friend I haven't seen in awhile that I'm planning on meeting with in a little over a week, otherwise no. I decided to start telling people "no". I'm definitely liking that I have no solid plans outside of that for the entire month. |
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Speedy
Sapphire
Posts: 4,613 Likes: 8,575
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Post by Speedy on Aug 2, 2017 12:03:24 GMT -6
Radley, Thanks. I had my follow up with the dentist today and he mentioned that I looked like I was feeling really good for having just had my surgery on Friday =) Unfortunately, I have to go and get 4 cavities sealed in the near future, but my dad told me that he'd roll it into what I already owe him, sooo I just gotta call and make the appointment. So done with teeth stuff! They got me on some good drugs (no narcs, just NSAIDS) and I'm definitely grateful for them! I really need to get back on the healthy eating thing. I've been slacking, and especially after my surgery since it's so hard to eat anything that I'm just eating what I can, which happens to be mostly crap food.
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MsG
New
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Post by MsG on Aug 4, 2017 5:59:29 GMT -6
How are you doing? Currently trying to overcome my vacation hangover after a week off. First world problem I know, but I'm sooo tired. Also got bad news re: TTC (See below) so just not feeling it this week. Status (TTA, TTC, Benched):TTC Diagnosis (if applicable): PCOS, just found out my husband has low motility Updates/questions:So I got partial results back from DH's semen analysis yesterday, and his sperm motility is in the 20-percentages. This news came from my OB who received over a report with only part of the results and said I should call the fertility clinic that did the test to talk about next steps and get the rest of the results (count and morphology). We called them and haven't received a return call yet, so of course I am spiraling down the rabbit hole of internet information. And it does not look good. And I am freaking out b/c I am not ready to jump to IVF and the internet seems to be telling me that it is our only option. Debbie downer (a place to vent ) : This whole thing is just such a freaking roller coaster. I am so beyond frustrated and annoyed as hell that the fertility clinic hasn't returned our phone call yet. Also frustrated that given the results, they didn't proactively reach out to us. QOTW : Any big plans for August? DH and I are taking a friends trip with our besties next weekend. I'm so looking forward to it but...tw lc below {Spoiler}They have a 4 month old little girl. I adore her and all, but she is 2 months older than my own little one would have been if I hadn't MC'd and it is so incredibly hard some days. On the heels of a new diagnosis, I'm worried I'll be emotional about it. |
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cara
Platinum
Posts: 1,375 Likes: 2,867
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Post by cara on Aug 4, 2017 7:46:10 GMT -6
How are you doing? Not great. This is all I can think about and it's affecting my mood in all aspects of my life. I have anxiety so I tend to ruminate about all of this.
Status (TTA, TTC, Benched): TTC
Diagnosis (if applicable): NA but haven't officially been checked out either. I suspect low progesterone due to a short LP and other signs.
Updates/questions: I've never been officially checked out for pre-pregnancy wellness or if I have any fertility issues. I'm 33, going to be 34 in January. At what point should I be concerned?
Debbie downer (a place to vent ) : Most of the ladies on my street have just had a baby or are pregnant. We had a neighborhood get together a couple of days ago and all the new moms flocked together. It was really hard. So many friends or people I know are pregnant as well. Last month we hit the key dates starting at -6 to O. Nothing. In fact, my period started early which was gutting. I'm starting to worry that I'm quickly approaching 35 and there might be an issue I don't know about since I haven't been officially checked out. I'm on month 6 of TTC which I know is a short period of time, but my advancing age is what is making me paranoid.
QOTW :
Any big plans for August? Nothing special. Just enjoy the end of summer.
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MsG
New
Posts: 79 Likes: 107
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Post by MsG on Aug 5, 2017 17:28:29 GMT -6
cara, It's hard not to obsess! But you're still definitely inside of the normal amount of time it can take a fertile couple to conceive, so it may just be taking you a little longer than you want. I definitely feel your pain though. It can really start to take over your life. Are you doing any temping or OPKs or anything? Radley, I am so sorry to hear about all the health issues. As someone still waiting for my first, I want to say that it is absolutely NOT selfish for you to feel disappointed at this point in your journey. I have everything crossed that you get better health news at your next doctor's appointment. Speedy, Congrats on the kitty! Hope you share some pictures  .
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cara
Platinum
Posts: 1,375 Likes: 2,867
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Post by cara on Aug 5, 2017 22:18:07 GMT -6
MsG - Yes, I'm using OPK's and temping. I'm also on progesterone due to my short LP and it has thrown off my usual O time, which is good I guess since it has extended it. I used to O around CD 18-19 and now it's 11-12. However, usually I can tell when O is coming and I'm thrown off this month. My OPK's aren't trending like they have been past cycles. Hoping that we catch the right timing this month.
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notmoose
Amethyst
Posts: 6,457 Likes: 10,896
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Post by notmoose on Aug 6, 2017 13:10:09 GMT -6
How are you doing? Not good at all. I feel like I'm drowning, I can't stop crying and can bar3ly function.
Status (TTA, TTC, Benched): idk? Benched until I get my first period after my loss? I haven't even spoken to my Dr, so Idk how this works.
Diagnosis (if applicable): n/a
Updates/questions: I have to get bloodwork tomorrow morning to make sure my levels are dropping. I also have an appointment with my Dr in the afternoon. I want to ask about checking my thyroid and progesterone but idk if he'll listen. I realized my doctors office fucking sucks and are very insensitive after going through this.
Debbie downer (a place to vent ) : ***TRIGGER WARNING***
Sorry idk how to spoiler on tapa.
I just had my loss on Wednesday. I was almost 11 weeks. Idk how to get through this, I am so devastated. Honestly I have been drunk the past 2 days because I cannot deal with my emotions. That will have to end tomorrow tho as MH goes to work and I have to parent. I am just heart broken and angry. I want to ttc as soon as I get my first cycle back. But then I feel guilty, like I'm trying to replace this baby or something. How do I get through this?
QOTW :
Any big plans for August? **TW LC mentioned**
My DD starts 3rd grade on the 15th and her 9th bday is the 22nd. That's about it.
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Speedy
Sapphire
Posts: 4,613 Likes: 8,575
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Post by Speedy on Aug 7, 2017 3:36:46 GMT -6
notmoose, I'm so sorry for your loss. I know it probably doesn't help much, but everything you're feeling right now is completely within the realm of normal. Be gentle with yourself over the next little while, and feel free to pop in here and vent whenever you need a friendly ear. As for TTC again, only you can know what's right for you. Some women feel comfortable TTC again as soon as they can, some like to wait a little while.
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Radley
Sapphire
Posts: 3,273 Likes: 13,750
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Post by Radley on Aug 7, 2017 7:47:30 GMT -6
notmoose I'm so so sorry about your loss. I know your incredibly sad right now and just know however you feel is okay. So many hugs. I had a hard time with the wanting to TTC again and feeling guilty about replacing. In my case, the farther away from my miscarriage I got, the more I wanted to get pregnant again and the less I felt guilty for it. I hope the same happens for you. MsG I'm so sorry. That has got to be very frustrating. I've found that specialist can be difficult to work with sometimes. I feel like they should have contacted you directly. Waiting is so annoying. And I really hope your trip goes well and isn't too hard on you. Anyway you could back out if it comes close and you are feeling too emotional? Also thank you for the sweet words. I often fuss at myself for being selfish and I appreciate you saying that. It means a lot. cara I would probably go in and have a pre-pregnancy appointment. They may run some labs and get idea of your diet. I think it's worth doing. My OB suggests that everyone go in when they are interested in starting TTC, even younger women.
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