sweetp
Sapphire
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Post by sweetp on Oct 6, 2021 7:58:37 GMT -6
goldenbird, I love how you are calling this your "break." Like, it doesn't have to be all or nothing, sometimes it's what feels right now, at this moment in time.
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Post by DavidRose on Oct 8, 2021 13:35:41 GMT -6
Hi - I still haven't drank for a while but I was hoping to just discuss something. On Friday's most weeks I find myself with a stress headache. It kind of feels like when you are anxious over something and then it is finally over and like all the feelings/emotions flood out and you are left with a headache (this might just be me I don't know). Well anyway, I used to have a beer at the end of the workweek and that always seemed to help me. I don't want to do that anymore so I was wondering if anyone had suggestions on how to deal with something like this.
I apologize if this is all over the place, my brain is just all over the place.
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Post by PandaWatch on Oct 8, 2021 14:20:39 GMT -6
Hi - I still haven't drank for a while but I was hoping to just discuss something. On Friday's most weeks I find myself with a stress headache. It kind of feels like when you are anxious over something and then it is finally over and like all the feelings/emotions flood out and you are left with a headache (this might just be me I don't know). Well anyway, I used to have a beer at the end of the workweek and that always seemed to help me. I don't want to do that anymore so I was wondering if anyone had suggestions on how to deal with something like this. I apologize if this is all over the place, my brain is just all over the place. Some suggestions: - exercise, even just a walk outside - deep breathing exercises - stretches to relieve tension in your neck and shoulders (that’s where I carry my stress)
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jaygee
Diamond
Posts: 28,240 Likes: 219,557
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Post by jaygee on Oct 8, 2021 14:29:37 GMT -6
Hi - I still haven't drank for a while but I was hoping to just discuss something. On Friday's most weeks I find myself with a stress headache. It kind of feels like when you are anxious over something and then it is finally over and like all the feelings/emotions flood out and you are left with a headache (this might just be me I don't know). Well anyway, I used to have a beer at the end of the workweek and that always seemed to help me. I don't want to do that anymore so I was wondering if anyone had suggestions on how to deal with something like this. I apologize if this is all over the place, my brain is just all over the place. Is there anything around the ritual of having the beer that you can identify? Did you have a beer and sit in a certain spot? Did you stay off your screen? Did you chat with a friend or partner? I would try to find a common feature of the beer routine to build a new calming, end of week ritual around. I use exercise - I go for a run most Fridays when I shut off my computer to mark the end of the week. I also get calmed by the fact that we eat out / don’t cook on Fridays. So that ritual is immediately stress relieving for me.
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apk4
Sapphire
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Post by apk4 on Oct 8, 2021 14:31:11 GMT -6
Hi - I still haven't drank for a while but I was hoping to just discuss something. On Friday's most weeks I find myself with a stress headache. It kind of feels like when you are anxious over something and then it is finally over and like all the feelings/emotions flood out and you are left with a headache (this might just be me I don't know). Well anyway, I used to have a beer at the end of the workweek and that always seemed to help me. I don't want to do that anymore so I was wondering if anyone had suggestions on how to deal with something like this. I apologize if this is all over the place, my brain is just all over the place. Is there anything around the ritual of having the beer that you can identify? Did you have a beer and sit in a certain spot? Did you stay off your screen? Did you chat with a friend or partner? I would try to find a common feature of the beer routine to build a new calming, end of week ritual around. I use exercise - I go for a run most Fridays when I shut off my computer to mark the end of the week. I also get calmed by the fact that we eat out / don’t cook on Fridays. So that ritual is immediately stress relieving for me. Ditto to all of this. I also replaced weekend drinks with a fountain diet coke. When I was still married, my H liked to watch tv and drink beer. I always drank wine with him. I started walking to the gas station instead and getting a diet coke. The combination of slight exercise and still having a "special drink" was very helpful.
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Post by DavidRose on Oct 8, 2021 16:01:05 GMT -6
Thank you all for those recs. It probably seemed like a silly question but when I'm feeling that way it feels impossible.
Dd1 and I went on a walk and I cracked open a root beer. I feel a bit better.
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addymac
Emerald
Posts: 12,683 Likes: 54,040
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Post by addymac on Oct 8, 2021 16:05:49 GMT -6
Thank you all for those recs. It probably seemed like a silly question but when I'm feeling that way it feels impossible. Dd1 and I went on a walk and I cracked open a root beer. I feel a bit better. When I was taking a break from drinking I really missed the taste of beer or cider or wine so I started drinking a glass of Crystal light lemonade or ice tea in the evening. Zero calories and tasty. It helped curb the need for something other than water. And it helped a lot.
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Post by goldenbird on Oct 8, 2021 17:48:03 GMT -6
60 days alcohol free on this break!🤸🤸🤸
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Post by DavidRose on Oct 8, 2021 19:57:43 GMT -6
Hi - I still haven't drank for a while but I was hoping to just discuss something. On Friday's most weeks I find myself with a stress headache. It kind of feels like when you are anxious over something and then it is finally over and like all the feelings/emotions flood out and you are left with a headache (this might just be me I don't know). Well anyway, I used to have a beer at the end of the workweek and that always seemed to help me. I don't want to do that anymore so I was wondering if anyone had suggestions on how to deal with something like this. I apologize if this is all over the place, my brain is just all over the place. Is there anything around the ritual of having the beer that you can identify? Did you have a beer and sit in a certain spot? Did you stay off your screen? Did you chat with a friend or partner? I would try to find a common feature of the beer routine to build a new calming, end of week ritual around. I use exercise - I go for a run most Fridays when I shut off my computer to mark the end of the week. I also get calmed by the fact that we eat out / don’t cook on Fridays. So that ritual is immediately stress relieving for me. I think it (drinking the beer) was the signal for me that work was over and I had 2 days off ahead of me. I haven't had much of a work life balance at all lately so it's been really hard to turn my brain off. I think this small piece is part of a larger issue but taking a walk was a nice way to "shut down." Even though I ended up answering emails again tonight. Ugh.
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jaygee
Diamond
Posts: 28,240 Likes: 219,557
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Post by jaygee on Oct 8, 2021 23:25:14 GMT -6
Is there anything around the ritual of having the beer that you can identify? Did you have a beer and sit in a certain spot? Did you stay off your screen? Did you chat with a friend or partner? I would try to find a common feature of the beer routine to build a new calming, end of week ritual around. I use exercise - I go for a run most Fridays when I shut off my computer to mark the end of the week. I also get calmed by the fact that we eat out / don’t cook on Fridays. So that ritual is immediately stress relieving for me. I think it (drinking the beer) was the signal for me that work was over and I had 2 days off ahead of me. I haven't had much of a work life balance at all lately so it's been really hard to turn my brain off. I think this small piece is part of a larger issue but taking a walk was a nice way to "shut down." Even though I ended up answering emails again tonight. Ugh. That makes total sense. I feel the same way since I work from home now. What about a mocktail or NA beer if you like the ritual but just don’t want the alcohol?
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Post by RunsforWineandCarbs on Oct 12, 2021 6:02:31 GMT -6
it's been a very stressful few weeks and i didn't stay committed to my plan. it's funny, i commit to others and stick with it but i bail on myself all the time. i put my foot down yesterday and i am determined not to fail myself anymore.
Yesterday was day 1. It was hard too, i kept having stupid excuses but i kicked them all down.
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Post by goldenbird on Oct 12, 2021 6:51:51 GMT -6
Yesterday was 9 weeks alcohol free on this break 🤗
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Post by goldenbird on Oct 12, 2021 6:53:14 GMT -6
it's been a very stressful few weeks and i didn't stay committed to my plan. it's funny, i commit to others and stick with it but i bail on myself all the time. i put my foot down yesterday and i am determined not to fail myself anymore. Yesterday was day 1. It was hard too, i kept having stupid excuses but i kicked them all down. One day at a time ❤️
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Post by microworm on Oct 12, 2021 7:44:27 GMT -6
it's been a very stressful few weeks and i didn't stay committed to my plan. it's funny, i commit to others and stick with it but i bail on myself all the time. i put my foot down yesterday and i am determined not to fail myself anymore. Yesterday was day 1. It was hard too, i kept having stupid excuses but i kicked them all down. Hi me. I had a bunch of social events but I'm not making that an excuse. It is my weakness and I need to be better.
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sweetp
Sapphire
Posts: 2,771 Likes: 16,462
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Post by sweetp on Oct 12, 2021 7:53:45 GMT -6
it's been a very stressful few weeks and i didn't stay committed to my plan. it's funny, i commit to others and stick with it but i bail on myself all the time. i put my foot down yesterday and i am determined not to fail myself anymore. Yesterday was day 1. It was hard too, i kept having stupid excuses but i kicked them all down. Hi me. I had a bunch of social events but I'm not making that an excuse. It is my weakness and I need to be better. Tritto. We went out Saturday night and I woke up feeling like crap on Sunday morning. Then had to spend all day at a baseball tournament. I don't know what was worse, the headache itself or the anxiety / self-deprecation I felt all day.
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Post by microworm on Oct 12, 2021 7:54:41 GMT -6
Hi me. I had a bunch of social events but I'm not making that an excuse. It is my weakness and I need to be better. Tritto. We went out Saturday night and I woke up feeling like crap on Sunday morning. Then had to spend all day at a baseball tournament. I don't know what was worse, the headache itself or the anxiety / self-deprecation I felt all day. For sure always the anxiety and self loathing. Most of the time.
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Post by RunsforWineandCarbs on Oct 12, 2021 8:21:19 GMT -6
Tritto. We went out Saturday night and I woke up feeling like crap on Sunday morning. Then had to spend all day at a baseball tournament. I don't know what was worse, the headache itself or the anxiety / self-deprecation I felt all day. For sure always the anxiety and self loathing. Most of the time. sunday i was already self examining my choices. like i woke up feeling great - drove 2 hours home in horrible traffic with loud obnoxious kids in the back and than had some wine. then we stop at a local brewery and i am like, why did i start? i was feeling great earlier and now i am not. and tomorrow is going to suck.
that's why i stopped drinking beer long ago; i just don't like how it makes me feel anymore.
i am a bit sad it's coming to that with all alcohol but again, at the same time, i'm not that sad.
I have goals that i haven't been able to achieve because of all that wine.
I want to see what happens without the wine.
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FlightView
Sapphire
Resident Alaskan
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Post by FlightView on Oct 12, 2021 9:23:17 GMT -6
I’ve had time to re-examine my relationship with alcohol and here’s what I’ve come to.
For me, both my bio parents were alcoholics. My mom died and my dad is in recovery. Alcohol was becoming a problem but I was managing it. Within a year into Covid I was drinking 4-6 drinks every night and even more on weekends. My sleep was shit, I was hungover everyday and I was gaining weight fast. I was like, oh we’re working and schooling from home so why not?
I’ve gained much more out of sobriety that I don’t feel like I’m missing out on anything. I know what happens when I drink, I’ve done that route. I haven’t tried to be sober though, and I hear that’s much better.
Am I currently an alcoholic? I don’t know. I know I am sleeping the best I ever have and I’m not pissing anyone off or having to explain myself to anyone.
I have 11 weeks now. I sometimes wonder if I can have a glass or beer and I’m sure I could, but I don’t want to let myself down. I feel like I caught it early enough where I wasn’t ruining my life or anyone else’s.
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PinkFreud
Opal
Anecdotes Police-Retired
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Post by PinkFreud on Oct 12, 2021 9:29:03 GMT -6
I am so incredibly proud of you all for making this committment to your health-mental and physical. It doesn't matter what the reason is, as long as you made it for yourself!
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PinkFreud
Opal
Anecdotes Police-Retired
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Post by PinkFreud on Oct 12, 2021 9:29:37 GMT -6
Hi - I still haven't drank for a while but I was hoping to just discuss something. On Friday's most weeks I find myself with a stress headache. It kind of feels like when you are anxious over something and then it is finally over and like all the feelings/emotions flood out and you are left with a headache (this might just be me I don't know). Well anyway, I used to have a beer at the end of the workweek and that always seemed to help me. I don't want to do that anymore so I was wondering if anyone had suggestions on how to deal with something like this. I apologize if this is all over the place, my brain is just all over the place. Yoga Mindfulness meditations
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PinkFreud
Opal
Anecdotes Police-Retired
Posts: 9,898 Likes: 59,707
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Post by PinkFreud on Oct 12, 2021 9:32:00 GMT -6
I’ve had time to re-examine my relationship with alcohol and here’s what I’ve come to. For me, both my bio parents were alcoholics. My mom died and my dad is in recovery. Alcohol was becoming a problem but I was managing it. Within a year into Covid I was drinking 4-6 drinks every night and even more on weekends. My sleep was shit, I was hungover everyday and I was gaining weight fast. I was like, oh we’re working and schooling from home so why not? I’ve gained much more out of sobriety that I don’t feel like I’m missing out on anything. I know what happens when I drink, I’ve done that route. I haven’t tried to be sober though, and I hear that’s much better. Am I currently an alcoholic? I don’t know. I know I am sleeping the best I ever have and I’m not pissing anyone off or having to explain myself to anyone. I have 11 weeks now. I sometimes wonder if I can have a glass or beer and I’m sure I could, but I don’t want to let myself down. I feel like I caught it early enough where I wasn’t ruining my life or anyone else’s. You don't have to define it. Just go with it. Enjoy the freedom you now have. Freedom from self bondage. I'm super proud of you
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jaygee
Diamond
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Post by jaygee on Oct 12, 2021 10:43:35 GMT -6
FlightView I think the new thinking around not drinking but not necessarily using labels like alcoholic that is happening in the alcohol free and sober communities is helpful. I don’t know how long this trend has been going on, but I found my way to it 3 years ago and it seems to be growing. I think there is absolutely value in the term alcoholic and the diagnosis and treatment of it for some portion of people. But it can also be very exclusive. And I think it’s hard for some people like me (and sounds like you) that are children or close relatives of alcoholics. It’s almost like when someone says Mrs your last name and you look around for the older person but they are talking to you. I feel like my dad is an alcoholic and I’m not that bad, so I’m not one. But that’s limiting because even though my drinking did not impact my life in the way my dad’s has his life (and mine) doesn’t mean it wasn’t on a spectrum of not ideal life choices and impacts. So I have found freedom in both not labeling myself an alcoholic but also not including alcohol in my life right now. I’m much more influenced and inspired by the positive benefits of the lack of alcohol rather than thinking of myself as a person that had a problem with alcohol. Reframing alcohol as the problem and not me as the problem worked better for me. I credit Annie Grace (This Naked Mind) with introducing me to this concept but I’ve found so many new voices that are also speaking to this. I hope that wasn’t too rambling for you. My point was just to agree with you and let you know that the labels and strict approach are not the only way. They certainly have to be the way for some people and certain circumstances. But it’s not the only way to live alcohol free.
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PinkFreud
Opal
Anecdotes Police-Retired
Posts: 9,898 Likes: 59,707
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Post by PinkFreud on Oct 12, 2021 10:55:26 GMT -6
jaygee, I love everything about what you wrote
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Post by goldenbird on Oct 12, 2021 11:54:21 GMT -6
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FlightView
Sapphire
Resident Alaskan
Posts: 4,444 Likes: 18,174
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Post by FlightView on Oct 15, 2021 9:45:53 GMT -6
In that same topic jaygee I had someone pop up on my TikTok saying what you just said. Kohdi.verse if anyone wants to watch. I knowingly skipped my Sunday sobriety meeting, then yesterday’s I completely forgot about. So I’m looking forward to this Sunday’s. I’ll have 12 weeks! I don’t know if I shared…My sleep is finally regulating now. The sugar cravings have not. Do those ever go away? 😂
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Post by goldenbird on Oct 15, 2021 9:54:29 GMT -6
In that same topic jaygee I had someone pop up on my TikTok saying what you just said. Kohdi.verse if anyone wants to watch. I knowingly skipped my Sunday sobriety meeting, then yesterday’s I completely forgot about. So I’m looking forward to this Sunday’s. I’ll have 12 weeks! I don’t know if I shared…My sleep is finally regulating now. The sugar cravings have not. Do those ever go away? 😂 If you've always loved sugar, probably not. At least for me 🤣
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Post by mnkatyintx on Oct 17, 2021 8:13:28 GMT -6
I hope y’all don’t mind me jumping in. I really just joined HIH for the celeb gossip and was browsing and found this thread.
I’m trying to cut way back on my drinking. Idk if 100% sobriety is for me, but I think drinking 1-2/month is more my goal. And for occasions, not just because it’s the weekend or whatever. I committed to this being a sober weekend and I feel SO good. I’m looking forward to being a productive badass today rather than sleeping a hangover away! After more coffee, of course…
Anyway, long story short, I hope you don’t mind me being here, and I appreciate this thread!
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Post by lucilleaustero on Oct 17, 2021 9:24:43 GMT -6
Thank you all for those recs. It probably seemed like a silly question but when I'm feeling that way it feels impossible. Dd1 and I went on a walk and I cracked open a root beer. I feel a bit better. I am not much of a drinker anymore, maybe 1 or 2 drinks per week, but I love fancy cocktails in my old age. I often make all sorts of fizzy and fancy mocktails when I want ti drink something posh. We keep all sorts of seltzers on hand and I love to muddle fruits/ herbs in seltzer, sometines with a dash of an exotic fruit juice. Dont miss the booze in those drinks.
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FlightView
Sapphire
Resident Alaskan
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Post by FlightView on Oct 17, 2021 10:30:41 GMT -6
I add fresh mint to my seltzer water and sometimes a splash of ginger beer when I’m feeling fancy.
I like flavored seltzer’s and my favorite is watermelon but any will do.
Except limoncello. That is the worst flavor I’ve ever had.
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Post by goldenbird on Oct 17, 2021 11:02:43 GMT -6
As it gets colder I'll be having more hot tea and hot chocolate. Hot chocolate with mini marshmallows was my jam back in January when I kicked off my first break.
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