~*~ PgAL/PAIF check-in week of July 15 ~*~

[muscari]

Welcome to the PgAL and PAIF check-in!

This is a weekly check-in for those of us who are pregnant after loss and/or infertility. Feel free to jump in any time!
The check-in is a safe place to share all things that come with being PgAL and/or PAIF.
Use this thread to ask questions, share your excitement/rage/worries/whatever, or to ask for support!

Please come on in and let us know how you're doing, and know you are always welcome
to come back throughout the week whenever you need to!! ♥

*~*~*~*~*


PgAL Mantras
aplacetomeet.freeforums.net/thread/373/pgal-mantras

PAIF Mantras
aplacetomeet.freeforums.net/post/47020/thread


**Loss/trigger warnings are not necessary here**

*~*~*~*~*

Weekly check-in:

How far along are you?

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)?

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week?

Do you need any thoughts or prayers?

Anything else you'd like to share?

QoTW: Does the thought of your baby(s) upcoming arrival mostly excite or more freak you out? How about YH/SO?

[muscari]

How far along are you?
35w3d

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)?
Physically I'm feeling rather pooped and sorta rough like all the time. My nights get broken in pieces by bathroom breaks, hip pain, reflux, nausea, and nightsweats. My days are rough cause I just lack all energy, I'm nauseous more often then not and I feel like living from nap to nap LOL. Fun times *g* Everytime I have plans for the day something comes up that takes most of my energy and things keep piling up, which frustrates the heck out of me though at the same time I'm too tired to really care? We also have another heatwave coming up this week (no A/C here) so I'm sorta dreading these next days LOL. BUT, babygirl has been rather active so even if she makes it impossible for me to eat&drink normally cause her bum is up in my stomach and her head makes me run to the bathroom all the time... I'm appreciating her efforts to reassure me she's doing fine.

Emotionally I've been doing mostly okay. I had some anxiety on Tuesday as she was going through one of her more quieter spells again, tried to stay busy/occupied but started feeling too worried on Wednesday as I still hadn't felt much movement that evening/overnight/in the morning etc. MH even came by from work end of morning to listen to her HB  with the stetoscope (and I was able to hear it myself as well) in hopes that would reassure me, but her decreased movements just freaked me out still. So as instructed I called and was able to go in for extra monitoring that afternoon. Babygirl did great on the CTG and my fluid level was the same as the week before so that was a relief and I've felt reassured and okay since. Also helps that she's been quite active these past days.


Any appointments or milestones coming up this week?
Tomorrow we have an OB appointment and they'll also check my fluidlevel and babies measurements etc again. They call it a biometrie echo here, is that what you call BPPs?
We don't have any other CTG/NSTs scheduled yet, but I know I can call to come in whenever I feel I need the reassurance so that's good. And who knows what they will schedule after our appointment tomorrow. I'm seeing my MFM on the 25th again.

Do you need any thoughts or prayers?
Wouldn't mind some FX for continued stabile fluid levels

Anything else you'd like to share?
We may be behind on the baby prep front at home, but we got her transportation all ready LOL as we bought a new(to-us) car last week! It's a Toyota Auris 1.8 Touring Sport (stationwagon)  and we already love how roomy it is. MH is happy cause it got all kinds of buttons and special feats LOL, and I'm happy cause it has plenty of room for all baby's stuff, stroller, toys, other crap and what not - which was the whole reason we traded in our Corolla hatchback for the stationwagon.

[muscari]

Ohh I forgot the QoTW: Does the thought of your baby(s) upcoming arrival mostly excite or more freak you out? How about YH/SO?

I think I am 50/50 excited and freaked out?! Sometimes the scale pops one way, sometimes the other.. I'm currently mostly just really excited and eager to meet our daughter and be able to hold, feel, cuddle, smell and love on her. But then I realize that here at home we're far from ready for her and I start to freak out. Though I am either just too exhausted, or otherwise just a bit numb cause of whatever, cause I'm also not that freaked out about how much stuff we still have left to do. Not sure what's going on with me on that front cause not too long ago it was causing me some serious headaches and stress and anxiety.

When it comes to MH I think he's also equally excited and freaking out.. I swear he's nesting in his own way - unfortunately this means he tackled a lot of garden and outside chores rather then inside chores like continue on nursery prep LOL. He's been a little moody lately though so I decided to just let him as I know this kind of thing really perks him up (and it did, as well as give him sore muscles hah). The moodyness stems from what I think is anxiety and worry over the baby and her imminent arrival and the worries we've had lately with her decreased movement and my fluid level etc. Sometimes I think I forget that it's not just me the mommy who is having a hard time with things sometimes but also daddy. Shame on me!

I do think it's INSANE to think that going by our duedate there's only 32 days left ??????? What happened to the other 248 days?!

[king26]

How far along are you? 34+4

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)? Ok. Physically I'm so tired of waking up in the middle of the night between 2-5 times to pee, because my hips hurt, because the baby is kicking, etc. Emotionally I'm up and down. I'm so excited to meet this baby but I've been having some anxiety dreams about him being born too early and me just leaving him in the hospital to come home, or something happening to him, etc. I'm also going between super happy and kind of sad. I don't know what my deal is.

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week?n Friday we have an u/s and our regular appointment and I'm hoping to have our carseat installed.

Do you need any thoughts or prayers? Nope thanks!

Anything else you'd like to share?
We are taking a short trip this week and I'm excited to get away from everything for a few days (though my car is being a jerk so we may have to take it into the shop in the morning)

QoTW: Does the thought of your baby(s) upcoming arrival mostly excite or more freak you out? How about YH/SO? BOTH! I'm mostly excited about meeting this baby but then I'm having some anxiety about being ready, visitors, knowing what to do.

muscari,  I know!   I'm at 39 days and I'm a little freaked out.  How am I under 40 days????

[muscari]

Quick update after today's BPP U/S and OB appointment. Babygirl is measuring right around the 50 percentile when it comes to growth and is doing great. Almost standard LOL. Bloodflow, cord&placenta etc checked out OK as well. My AFI actually went up some, though baby had an almost empty blatter so maybe that was why ;-) But either way they're not concerned about me leaking any more. On weekly appointments now so that also helps feel less stressed, and I know I can still always come in whenever I feel I need to for an extra CTG or AFI check. I feel pretty good and much more reassured and positive that we actually may make it a full 40 weeks now rather then have to deliver early.

[cali]

Sorry I'm late!!

How far along are you?
34w4d

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)?
Physically I'm sore but ok. Emotionally I'm starting to feel excited but also so nervous! I hate that I have no idea what to expect during labor. I'm such a planner that's it's killing me that I can't plan this out!

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week?
NST and OB on Wednesday.

Do you need any thoughts or prayers?
No, thanks!

Anything else you'd like to share?
I think mh finally is feeling some urgency to get stuff done. He had some vacation days that he had to use before the end of the month and he took of Weds and Thurs just to finish all baby prep. I'm so excited to get stuff done! I'm also going to try to make some freezer meals this week.

QoTW: Does the thought of your baby(s) upcoming arrival mostly excite or more freak you out? How about YH/SO?

I'm getting really excited to meet her. The only part that freaks me out is labor and delivery because it just makes me nervous but I really can't wait to see baby girl. MH is definitely just excited.

[cali]

king26, have a fun trip! Where are you headed??

muscari, I'm so glad things seem to be going well. My doc is ok with delivery any time after 37 weeks, so you're very close to where everything should be totally ok if she does come before 40.

[elliecat17]

cali I know what you mean about not knowing and it being hard as a planner. It's been keeping me up at night, and I keep reminding myself not to be scared or nervous, because being tense makes it harder. It's different being the one doing it not the one watching/helping although as a student I never really got to help a whole lot....

muscari yay for good news on the AFI and the percentile. Also I love the new car! It's an awesome baby purchase. And I'm sorry for the heatwave. Soak your feet in cool water if you get too hot and make sure to put cool water on your wrists and the back of your neck. Hopefully it will keep you more comfy! As for bladders, I swear my baby kneads mine like the cats knead the pillows.

king26 enjoy the short trip! Sounds like it should be fun and relaxing.

[elliecat17]

How far along are you?
34w and 5 days! I am amazed that I'm counting down through the 30s for days left!

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)?
Physically sore in the pelvis, and sometimes in my lower back. I am wondering if I have something up with my bladder or if the occasional sharp twinges are just baby giving it a good punch.
Emotionally frustrated by the lack of work done on the nursery. However I am also nervous about labor and delivery. I feel like I'm such a baby when it comes to pain and I'm still not really sure what to expect. The classes we took were ridiculous and did not prepare me in any way, and I can't get H to watch any of the online lamaze stuff with me. So should I just watch it myself and try and be my own coach?! Finally I really can't wait to meet baby. I just want to know at this point if it's a boy or a girl!

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week?
Midwife on Thursday

Do you need any thoughts or prayers?
That I didn't hurt baby when I toppled over on top of it today....

Anything else you'd like to share?
I am getting ready to call my midwife because I leaned over things to plug in my computer today and I lost my balance and fell. Right on top of baby. Now it didn't fall far (about 1 foot) and I fell onto soft things, but I'm a little nervous just because I know at this point there is less cushion in there for baby.

QoTW: Does the thought of your baby(s) upcoming arrival mostly excite or more freak you out? How about YH/SO?
It mostly excites me, although I do have my moments of freak out. I am guessing H is just excited, but he refuses to answer my question when I ask him this.

[addymac]

elliecat17 hope everything is okay w the LO- better to call and be safe than be worrying.

I'm actually surprised I haven't hurt my belly yet- I was just telling DH this yesterday and he agreed, right after I slammed my leg into the futon and got a nasty bruise on my thigh.

@starzia I don't know the difference. Sometimes I get worried I'm going to be completely oblivious to PTL or actual labor. My Dr told me if a contraction "takes my breath away" that's important. So so far, nothing has done that but I've had a few painful ones. Then I worry, should these have taken my breath away? Or do I have awesome pain management skills I didn't know about??? 🤷🏻‍♀️

muscari I'm so glad the fluid levels seem to have resolved! Yay for staying put, baby girl!

cali my H seemed to be the same. He was all ladi-dadi about shit and then last week he freaked out and was in full on baby mode this weekend. It made me very happy that we set up the nursery furniture and stroller. Now just to put all his clothes away- we got SO MANY from my BIL/SIL that I feel overwhelmed. I know I need to just sit down and do it but oof!

king26 enjoy your trip!! I'm so jealous, I wish we could take a mini vacation. Our last vacation was in February and I didn't enjoy myself very much (I was in the throes of first tri sickness/exhaustion, got a uti, had an awful cold, and it was our loss baby's EDD) so I was not super gung ho about that trip.

[addymac]

How far along are you? 35+2

How are you feeling (physically/emotionally)? Physically I'm done. My lower leg / ankle / foot swelling is Just ugh. I'm over it and it hurts! My hip / lower back pain had gotten progressively worse and hurts regardless of what position I'm in. Heartburn is okay, it comes and goes. Don't have it for a day or two, then hits with a rough meal. I'll take it.

Emotionally- really nervous. What if I'm not a good mom? What if baby just cries all. The. Time. What if he doesn't sleep well at night when I'm at work and DH is handling it solo and is exhausted because he's working 80 hours a week and still not getting much sleep and I need to switch my job? What if something's wrong with him, health-wise? What if he's not moving a lot because something is going wrong and it takes me an hour too long to figure it out?

Any appointments or milestones coming up this week? Ultrasound on Thursday!!! So excited to see him and what he might look like and if he has hair and how big he is!

Do you need any thoughts or prayers? I'm okay. Just a lot of what ifs

Anything else you'd like to share? We still don't have a name and it is stressing me out. We haven't found a name that makes us go "Ah! Yes, that's it!" And i know I need to let go of that image of that happening, but it's hard!!

QoTW: Does the thought of your baby(s) upcoming arrival mostly excite or more freak you out? How about YH/SO?
I'm like 50/50 so excited to meet and cuddle him. And so terrified I'm going to suck at being a mom. This isn't ikea- you can't return them up to 365 days later! I'm scared about how DHs and my relationship is going to change, if I have enough patience and can control my temper when I'm cranky from lack of sleep. How I'm going to manage cooking and surviving with the baby. And, now that we built all his furniture, what if something happens and he doesn't come home? What do we do with all this ikea furniture??

DH is similarly excited. So excited. And completely terrified, too. He's also sad he doesn't get a lot of time off with him, but he's so excited to be a dad, I'm so excited to see them together. It's going to melt my heart moreso than seeing him interact with my belly does.

[king26]

Back from our trip to the bay and it was really nice. We went to Kent Narrows on the Chesapeake Bay and had beautiful weather. Only dumb thing I did was decide to take a walk to the beach in the heat. When we got back to the car my fingers looked like Vienna Sausages they were so swollen. Thankfully a dip in the pool helped.

I had my first u/s in 11 weeks and saw baby boy. However, he is totally scrunched up in my uterus. I feel like he's running out of room in there poor guy. They managed to measure everything and he is measuring a week ahead and looks to be about 6 pounds! EEEEK! He is head down, SUPER low in my uterus, and ready to roll.

I also had an appointment to have our carseat put in today so a NICU nurse came and helped me and talked me through putting it in, the actual carseat, how to use it, etc. It was really helpful information. So one more thing checked off the list!

Glad baby girl is looking good muscari,
elliecat17, I hope you and baby are both ok!
addymac, We have no clue about a name either and we're due a few days after you. I just haven't found something i love yet