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Post by grumpycakes on Jul 13, 2017 10:36:40 GMT -6
You've had all week. What is your unpopular opinion?
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Post by grumpycakes on Jul 13, 2017 10:38:13 GMT -6
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Post by grumpycakes on Jul 13, 2017 10:39:55 GMT -6
I recently went to a shower where I was asked to address my own thank you card envelope. I would rather not get a thank you card than address my own. Popular or no?
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Post by grumpycakes on Jul 13, 2017 10:48:39 GMT -6
I don't understand the interest in the size of babies when they're born unless they're unusually small or large. I find it weird that we tell the weight and length in the birth announcement.
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mapleme
Amethyst
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Post by mapleme on Jul 13, 2017 10:54:48 GMT -6
I love gummy bears.
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sarenu
Amethyst
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Post by sarenu on Jul 13, 2017 10:56:55 GMT -6
I've been asked (multiple times) if I will be having a baby shower for my third.
I just don't get the 2nd and 3rd baby shower thing. Maybe if it's been like 5+ years between or something.
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mapleme
Amethyst
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Post by mapleme on Jul 13, 2017 10:57:14 GMT -6
I recently went to a shower where I was asked to address my own thank you card envelope. I would rather not get a thank you card than address my own. Popular or no? I get this from a "make sure that we got it right" standpoint. But yeah, thank you cards are a clutter. Can you just email me to let me know that you appreciate the gift? Or not. I mean, if I've mailed something, I would like to know that it was received, but outside of that, I'm good.
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Post by grumpycakes on Jul 13, 2017 11:03:53 GMT -6
I recently went to a shower where I was asked to address my own thank you card envelope. I would rather not get a thank you card than address my own. Popular or no? I get this from a "make sure that we got it right" standpoint. But yeah, thank you cards are a clutter. Can you just email me to let me know that you appreciate the gift? Or not. I mean, if I've mailed something, I would like to know that it was received, but outside of that, I'm good. No this was definitely "It's less work for us if you address your own card." They already had my address right because I had gotten a paper invite to the shower.
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mapleme
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Posts: 6,065 Likes: 16,081
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Post by mapleme on Jul 13, 2017 11:06:06 GMT -6
I get this from a "make sure that we got it right" standpoint. But yeah, thank you cards are a clutter. Can you just email me to let me know that you appreciate the gift? Or not. I mean, if I've mailed something, I would like to know that it was received, but outside of that, I'm good. No this was definitely "It's less work for us if you address your own card." They already had my address right because I had gotten a paper invite to the shower. Well, it's less work for me if they don't have a baby shower. Jus' sayin'
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Post by grumpycakes on Jul 13, 2017 11:07:02 GMT -6
No this was definitely "It's less work for us if you address your own card." They already had my address right because I had gotten a paper invite to the shower. Well, it's less work for me if they don't have a baby shower. Jus' sayin' Right? It would have been less work for me to not get a gift. Thank card problem solved.
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Post by Dramaphile on Jul 13, 2017 11:24:34 GMT -6
Not a fan of showers for second or third children unless maybe there's a big gap in age (like 10 years), or if it's a first child for one of the parents and not for the other. They're cute and fun, but I'm not going to more than one for you.
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Post by ovenrack on Jul 13, 2017 11:31:59 GMT -6
UO: I had a second baby shower. Well, it was a book-giving party, and only a few close family and two friends' families came. I didn't suggest it; it was enthusiastically offered to me. Meh.
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Post by CurlieWhirlie on Jul 13, 2017 11:40:22 GMT -6
I do not think leaving children upset at daycare/preschool teaches them that "the people who love them most will abandon them". A UO with my mother, who is currently heartbroken over me leaving M at school this morning.
I know this is not a true UO, sorry.
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Post by Dramaphile on Jul 13, 2017 11:41:19 GMT -6
UO: I had a second baby shower. Well, it was a book-giving party, and only a few close family and two friends' families came. I didn't suggest it; it was enthusiastically offered to me. Meh. I don't mind them for close family or if someone's office decides to throw them a shower, but the big to-do second showers with umpteen guests are a big nope. Also not a fan of "gender reveal" parties. Although I bet J is going to want one for our (some day) second kid since I've agreed to go his way and find out the baby's sex. Unless I can change his mind, he was pretty psyched to get to announce Nugget was a girl when she was born.
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mapleme
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Post by mapleme on Jul 13, 2017 11:47:09 GMT -6
I do not think leaving children upset at daycare/preschool teaches them that "the people who love them most will abandon them". A UO with my mother, who is currently heartbroken over me leaving M at school this morning. I know this is not a true UO, sorry. There are a couple babies in C's DC room who get really upset when their parents leave and the parents make it SO MUCH WORSE. They stick around and start playing with the kid and try to get them to be all happy. But it never works, the kid is all anxious because they know mom/dad are leaving and the parent just wants to get the f out of there. JUST GO. The kid cries for a few seconds and moves on. If anything it teaches them that the people they love most will show back up at the end of the day.
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sarenu
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Post by sarenu on Jul 13, 2017 11:52:19 GMT -6
I do not think leaving children upset at daycare/preschool teaches them that "the people who love them most will abandon them". A UO with my mother, who is currently heartbroken over me leaving M at school this morning. I know this is not a true UO, sorry. There are a couple babies in C's DC room who get really upset when their parents leave and the parents make it SO MUCH WORSE. They stick around and start playing with the kid and try to get them to be all happy. But it never works, the kid is all anxious because they know mom/dad are leaving and the parent just wants to get the f out of there. JUST GO. The kid cries for a few seconds and moves on. If anything it teaches them that the people they love most will show back up at the end of the day. Yup, I'm the mom who leaves the kid crying in the DC teacher's arms. The quicker I leave, the quicker I can get back to pick them up or see them at night.
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Post by CurlieWhirlie on Jul 13, 2017 11:54:17 GMT -6
Well obviously I agree with you, but my mom just accosted me when I got home and told me her heart is breaking and she has tears in her eyes thinking of me leaving M at preschool today, and she thinks I am doing the wrong thing and it's cruel and unnecessary. And I am torn between rolling my eyes and being REALLY angry at her for being so fucking dramatic and also second-guessing and judging my parenting decisions.
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mapleme
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Post by mapleme on Jul 13, 2017 11:57:12 GMT -6
Well obviously I agree with you, but my mom just accosted me when I got home and told me her heart is breaking and she has tears in her eyes thinking of me leaving M at preschool today, and she thinks I am doing the wrong thing and it's cruel and unnecessary. And I am torn between rolling my eyes and being REALLY angry at her for being so fucking dramatic and also second-guessing and judging my parenting decisions. Does she mean leaving him there instead of staying there all day with him like she does? Because she does know that at some point that will have to happen, right? And that this is a developmentally normal point for this to happen, right? I would choose your reaction to her based on whatever makes it easier for you to release it and move on.
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nikkipal
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Post by nikkipal on Jul 13, 2017 12:03:10 GMT -6
Expiration dates are not all that. If my food looks fine and smells fine, I'll probably go for it.
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nikkipal
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Post by nikkipal on Jul 13, 2017 12:05:22 GMT -6
I recently went to a shower where I was asked to address my own thank you card envelope. I would rather not get a thank you card than address my own. Popular or no? I've done this quite a bit recently. I was mostly annoyed that I didn't do it for my shower. It's kind of weird getting something in the mail that you addressed to yourself, though.
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Post by Dramaphile on Jul 13, 2017 12:14:39 GMT -6
Well obviously I agree with you, but my mom just accosted me when I got home and told me her heart is breaking and she has tears in her eyes thinking of me leaving M at preschool today, and she thinks I am doing the wrong thing and it's cruel and unnecessary. And I am torn between rolling my eyes and being REALLY angry at her for being so fucking dramatic and also second-guessing and judging my parenting decisions. Ugh, that is seriously obnoxious. Some kids cry when you leave them at daycare/preschool, because they want you to stay (duh). those same kids are 99% of the time perfectly fine a few minutes after you leave. I used to tell parents to stand out in the hallway and wait for their kid to stop crying. Prolonging drop-off makes it worse most of the time because it reinforces for your kid that if they fuss, you will stay longer, so they fuss more. I know I don't need to tell you this. Your mom needs to STFU and let you be the parent. If it's at that point, I would really stress with her that the way she is speaking to you makes you feel like she is not trusting your decisions as a parent and that is really hurtful to you. Seems like the emotional is what she is focused on, so pointing out your hurt over her reactions might get through to her if logic won't.
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mapleme
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Post by mapleme on Jul 13, 2017 12:21:17 GMT -6
Expiration dates are not all that. If my food looks fine and smells fine, I'll probably go for it. Yup. I constantly tell stores that I don't put expiration dates on my hot sauces and mustards because they don't have one. Putting one on there just encourages people to throw out perfectly good food.
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Post by CurlieWhirlie on Jul 13, 2017 12:26:30 GMT -6
Well obviously I agree with you, but my mom just accosted me when I got home and told me her heart is breaking and she has tears in her eyes thinking of me leaving M at preschool today, and she thinks I am doing the wrong thing and it's cruel and unnecessary. And I am torn between rolling my eyes and being REALLY angry at her for being so fucking dramatic and also second-guessing and judging my parenting decisions. Ugh, that is seriously obnoxious. Some kids cry when you leave them at daycare/preschool, because they want you to stay (duh). those same kids are 99% of the time perfectly fine a few minutes after you leave. I used to tell parents to stand out in the hallway and wait for their kid to stop crying. Prolonging drop-off makes it worse most of the time because it reinforces for your kid that if they fuss, you will stay longer, so they fuss more. I know I don't need to tell you this. Your mom needs to STFU and let you be the parent. If it's at that point, I would really stress with her that the way she is speaking to you makes you feel like she is not trusting your decisions as a parent and that is really hurtful to you. Seems like the emotional is what she is focused on, so pointing out your hurt over her reactions might get through to her if logic won't. I think Mapes is right that I need to temper my reaction to her drama in whatever way will allow me to release it and move on. While I would love to have her hear me that she is hurting me with this bullshit, I would really rather not prolong the discussion and risk it turning into a longer fight. My autocorrect wants Mapes to be vapes.
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mapleme
Amethyst
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Post by mapleme on Jul 13, 2017 12:36:46 GMT -6
Ugh, that is seriously obnoxious. Some kids cry when you leave them at daycare/preschool, because they want you to stay (duh). those same kids are 99% of the time perfectly fine a few minutes after you leave. I used to tell parents to stand out in the hallway and wait for their kid to stop crying. Prolonging drop-off makes it worse most of the time because it reinforces for your kid that if they fuss, you will stay longer, so they fuss more. I know I don't need to tell you this. Your mom needs to STFU and let you be the parent. If it's at that point, I would really stress with her that the way she is speaking to you makes you feel like she is not trusting your decisions as a parent and that is really hurtful to you. Seems like the emotional is what she is focused on, so pointing out your hurt over her reactions might get through to her if logic won't. I think Mapes is right that I need to temper my reaction to her drama in whatever way will allow me to release it and move on. While I would love to have her hear me that she is hurting me with this bullshit, I would really rather not prolong the discussion and risk it turning into a longer fight. My autocorrect wants Mapes to be vapes.I'm so hot
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piccyami
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Post by piccyami on Jul 13, 2017 12:41:48 GMT -6
I don't understand the interest in the size of babies when they're born unless they're unusually small or large. I find it weird that we tell the weight and length in the birth announcement. I'm pretty positive that our birth announcements just had their names and birthday/times on them. And we only did announcements because I'm pretty sure at least half of my family didn't even know I was pregnant. Oh, and the RE, because I never updated them on my pregnancy like they asked.
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jnu76
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Post by jnu76 on Jul 13, 2017 13:04:45 GMT -6
I recently went to a shower where I was asked to address my own thank you card envelope. I would rather not get a thank you card than address my own. Popular or no? I think addressing the envelopes is the most tedious part of sending anything, so I'd be irritated to be asked to do it myself for a thank you card for a gift that I took the time to get for someone. They might as well ask you to write the note yourself and buy the stamp. I think that's really tacky.
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Post by grumpycakes on Jul 13, 2017 13:11:29 GMT -6
I recently went to a shower where I was asked to address my own thank you card envelope. I would rather not get a thank you card than address my own. Popular or no? I think addressing the envelopes is the most tedious part of sending anything, so I'd be irritated to be asked to do it myself for a thank you card for a gift that I took the time to get for someone. They might as well ask you to write the note yourself and buy the stamp. I think that's really tacky. Yeah that's how I felt, too.
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piccyami
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Post by piccyami on Jul 13, 2017 13:21:35 GMT -6
You do not need to alert the entire company that someone is leaving. Tell the important people and leave it at that.
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Post by critter015 on Jul 13, 2017 15:58:06 GMT -6
I agree with just leaving the crying kid. They'll be fine. I volunteer in the nursery at church and some children just really need to learn that they can be away from their parent for a little while. I am also perpetually leaving a crying child, and they do usually stop after a few minutes.
Confession: It basically took a year for O to stop crying the whole time I was in church. I asked the nursery workers not to come get me when he wouldn't stop crying because I needed the break and I didn't want to reinforce his crying by coming back right away. He was THE hardest baby and that one hour a week saved my sanity, I volunteer now to pay it forward.
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milano
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Post by milano on Jul 13, 2017 16:04:19 GMT -6
I recently went to a shower where I was asked to address my own thank you card envelope. I would rather not get a thank you card than address my own. Popular or no? This is the most horrifying "new" trend. I die a bit inside every time I see it done, I physically cringe. One of my bridesmaids started to do this at my own bridal shower and I awkwardly was like 'Nooooooooooooo you must stop this immediately'. So they put out an address book for everyone to put their contact info in instead and that was actually awesome and I still use that address book to this day.
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