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Post by catlady22 on Oct 14, 2020 9:33:11 GMT -6
onyx solidarity. I have pretty much the exact same situation. SIL has a due date 1 week behind my loss. I decided not to go to the shower and only send a gift. DH thinks I'm crazy for that. You are totally justified in your feelings. Ya MH got really salty when I said I was going to just drive by. He basically said he understands why I don’t wanna go but hopes that I do and that I should be celebrating with her and I’m like I AM AS BEST I CAN I see we have the same H. Mine was like it's a different baby. I was like you think I don't know that? It's that I don't want a reminder of what I should look like and have to talk about babies with women I don't know for 2hrs. I will treat the baby the same as any other family once it arrives... I'm just not in the mental state to handle a party right now
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Post by ambiguousmango on Oct 14, 2020 9:38:33 GMT -6
I'm sorry that so many can commiserate. onyx that sucks and I would feel the same way. catlady22 you should feel no guilt in not going.
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onyx
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Post by onyx on Oct 14, 2020 9:57:19 GMT -6
Ya MH got really salty when I said I was going to just drive by. He basically said he understands why I don’t wanna go but hopes that I do and that I should be celebrating with her and I’m like I AM AS BEST I CAN I see we have the same H. Mine was like it's a different baby. I was like you think I don't know that? It's that I don't want a reminder of what I should look like and have to talk about babies with women I don't know for 2hrs. I will treat the baby the same as any other family once it arrives... I'm just not in the mental state to handle a party right now I’m so sorry you can commiserate. That’s almost exactly mine and MH conversation. He’s like i want to be empathetic but I don’t feel the same way. At which point I said that’s fine but he’s also not the one dealing with all the physical stuff on top of the emotional.
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Post by catlady22 on Oct 14, 2020 9:59:50 GMT -6
I see we have the same H. Mine was like it's a different baby. I was like you think I don't know that? It's that I don't want a reminder of what I should look like and have to talk about babies with women I don't know for 2hrs. I will treat the baby the same as any other family once it arrives... I'm just not in the mental state to handle a party right now I’m so sorry you can commiserate. That’s almost exactly mine and MH conversation. He’s like i want to be empathetic but I don’t feel the same way. At which point I said that’s fine but he’s also not the one dealing with all the physical stuff on top of the emotional. Yes so much this. I try to remember that they don't deal with the hormones that went with the pregnancy and loss. As well as all the trauma of bleeding, pain, etc. They can't 100% get our point of view.
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Post by donnameagle on Oct 14, 2020 10:46:43 GMT -6
There are so many people I was close in due date with.
I did not do showers, birthday parties, etc for any of them.
That message is shitty even under good circumstances. Fuck em all!
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miawallace
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Post by miawallace on Oct 14, 2020 14:28:29 GMT -6
onyx - I’ve mentioned before that watching my sil go through her baby shower and pregnancy was really hard because it coincided with my loss quite closely. Those things are never easy. They bring out the worst in us sometimes. Sometimes I had to give myself big pep talks so that I could go. I always cried after. It took a few deep breaths in the bathroom. What would irk me is the letting you guys know there is stuff that needs to still be bought. Nah. That’s not your responsibility at al. Y’all got what you guys got and that’s it. I would have just said “cool. Thanks for letting us know” and left it at that. It’s pretty presumptuous of them to expect all those things to be bought either way.
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Post by katespade on Oct 14, 2020 14:42:03 GMT -6
onyx that’s really shitty to do to you. 100% shitty. Also who needs a steam mop for a nursery?! I’m sorry. It was definitely hard for me when there were 5 women between my friend group and DD’s preschool all due within 2 weeks of when I would have been due with the ectopic. My best friend was one of them and she was SO kind about it, which made it easier to be happy for her and celebrate with her instead of being salty about it.
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onyx
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Post by onyx on Oct 15, 2020 8:15:39 GMT -6
Does anyone here use digital OPKs? I was given some so I’ve been using them. I had a surge to 31 on the 13th, then 53 yesterday, and today is 61. My app predicts today is ovulation but I literally don’t know. I usually stop testing once I get a positive but the numbers were so cool to me I just kept on lol
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onyx
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Post by onyx on Oct 15, 2020 9:10:27 GMT -6
Also thanks for the understanding ladies. It’s nice to feel understood.
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Post by donnameagle on Oct 15, 2020 10:14:39 GMT -6
Does anyone here use digital OPKs? I was given some so I’ve been using them. I had a surge to 31 on the 13th, then 53 yesterday, and today is 61. My app predicts today is ovulation but I literally don’t know. I usually stop testing once I get a positive but the numbers were so cool to me I just kept on lol I only used the smiley face kind LOL
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onyx
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Post by onyx on Oct 15, 2020 11:08:10 GMT -6
Does anyone here use digital OPKs? I was given some so I’ve been using them. I had a surge to 31 on the 13th, then 53 yesterday, and today is 61. My app predicts today is ovulation but I literally don’t know. I usually stop testing once I get a positive but the numbers were so cool to me I just kept on lol I only used the smiley face kind LOL I just need to step away from peeing on things.
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Rama
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Post by Rama on Oct 15, 2020 21:57:23 GMT -6
onyx That seems weird, rude, and cringy in the best of circumstances. I'd feel exactly the same way. And definitely not up for celebrating SIL or BFF, no matter how much I love them. Like...shit hurts and you gotta take care of you. If they can't take that, that's on them.
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sammysam
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Post by sammysam on Oct 19, 2020 6:53:21 GMT -6
Sorry onyx :/ People are so dumb sometimes After my second loss I skipped my aunt and uncle's 50th wedding anniversary party because I couldn't handle seeing all my cousins with all their kids (seriously...like everyone in my family has at least 3 kids...) Also I only use the smiley face digis too... 3dpo here. I started using a tempdrop this cycle and I'm in love with it. It has totally taken away the stress of temping every day!!!
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remi
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Post by remi on Oct 19, 2020 12:19:47 GMT -6
Sorry onyx :/ People are so dumb sometimes After my second loss I skipped my aunt and uncle's 50th wedding anniversary party because I couldn't handle seeing all my cousins with all their kids (seriously...like everyone in my family has at least 3 kids...) Also I only use the smiley face digis too... 3dpo here. I started using a tempdrop this cycle and I'm in love with it. It has totally taken away the stress of temping every day!!! What is a tempdrop?
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sammysam
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Post by sammysam on Oct 20, 2020 6:31:28 GMT -6
remi It's a wearable bbt. I just put it around my upper arm when I go to bed. Then it doesn't matter how many times I'm up with N or what time I wake up. It's super easy to use. I had an Ava for a little while but hated it so gifted it to someone on here. The tempdrop only records temperature and I'm loving it since I love charting:)
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remi
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Post by remi on Oct 20, 2020 6:49:58 GMT -6
remi It's a wearable bbt. I just put it around my upper arm when I go to bed. Then it doesn't matter how many times I'm up with N or what time I wake up. It's super easy to use. I had an Ava for a little while but hated it so gifted it to someone on here. The tempdrop only records temperature and I'm loving it since I love charting:) Might have to look into this because I feel like my temps aren’t very accurate when I take them orally and just creates more stress for me.
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sammysam
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Post by sammysam on Oct 21, 2020 17:48:09 GMT -6
remi that is exactly how I was feeling. I sleep so much better now and I don't stress about whether I had enough sleep, or took it at the right time, or had to get up to pee...it is honestly the best TTC money I've spent.
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Post by Deleted on Oct 21, 2020 17:55:22 GMT -6
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Post by shellsncheese on Oct 21, 2020 20:26:14 GMT -6
I'm 9 dpiui today. I tested out the trigger and it was pretty much gone yesterday. I didn't test today but probably will tomorrow.
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onyx
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Post by onyx on Oct 27, 2020 8:23:17 GMT -6
How is everyone?
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Post by catlady22 on Oct 27, 2020 8:29:42 GMT -6
Still waiting on a cycle here. How are you?
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onyx
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Post by onyx on Oct 27, 2020 9:10:29 GMT -6
Still waiting on a cycle here. How are you? CD 1 should be tomorrow. BFN. So just waiting.
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Post by catlady22 on Oct 27, 2020 9:13:15 GMT -6
Still waiting on a cycle here. How are you? CD 1 should be tomorrow. BFN. So just waiting. I'm sorry 😔 did they up your progesterone more?
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Post by shellsncheese on Oct 27, 2020 9:41:57 GMT -6
Still waiting on a cycle here. How are you? CD 1 should be tomorrow. BFN. So just waiting. Sorry onyx. I almost wrote the exact same thing, except cd1 should be today.
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Post by catlady22 on Oct 27, 2020 9:47:18 GMT -6
Sorry to hear that shellsncheese My app claims my CD1 is supposed to be today as well, but obviously it could be off from surgery.
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onyx
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Post by onyx on Oct 27, 2020 13:29:31 GMT -6
CD 1 should be tomorrow. BFN. So just waiting. I'm sorry 😔 did they up your progesterone more? They did. I’m on 25mg now. I wasn’t really expecting it this month since it’s the first normal cycle month. I’m sorry to hear that for you both.
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Post by ambiguousmango on Oct 27, 2020 13:31:23 GMT -6
Just waiting around hoping I ovulate. Sorry for everyone on, or about to start, CD1.
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whatsit
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Post by whatsit on Oct 27, 2020 13:46:19 GMT -6
Hi ladies
I’m back....
I’m still kinda processing our loss and waiting on follow up appointments to see what happens next.
I’ll be hanging around anyway and hoping for wonderful things for all of you. <3
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onyx
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Post by onyx on Oct 27, 2020 14:31:44 GMT -6
Hi ladies I’m back.... I’m still kinda processing our loss and waiting on follow up appointments to see what happens next. I’ll be hanging around anyway and hoping for wonderful things for all of you. <3 praying for you and sending so much love to you.
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Post by catlady22 on Oct 27, 2020 14:36:10 GMT -6
whatsit oh no, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. Thinking of you ❤
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