About "Time Out"

[tj]

I know not everyone here believes in time out. But when my girls fight, they get so worked up, that the only thing that seems to work is to separate them and have them sit down to "think about" their behavior/choices. Then we discuss it, hug it out, and go about playing.

It used to work. It really did. Or at least, with E it did. P has not had to "think about it" as much as E did, so she's not as skilled at actually stopping her play and focusing on her behavior and choices to discuss later. But she's also younger than E.

But here's my real question about "Time Out." The girls just about always suddenly start panicking and crying that they need to go potty "rightnowrightnowrightnow!!!" I have been letting them go potty with little to no interaction from me (assistance as required) and then they return to their rooms to finish thinking about their choices. It's like, 3-4 minutes depending on the kid (one minute per year of age.) But mh swears they are faking.

Surely a 3 and a 4 year old can hold it for 3-4 minutes right? Are they stalling? Distracting? Manipulating? Or when they quit playing, do they actually realize they were about to pee their pants, and legit need to go?

WWYD? Let them go? Or ask them if they can wait 3 more minutes?

[linewifekat]

That's a tough one. I recently put a potty chair back in dd1's room for when I have to put her in her room for various reasons.

[kona]

Given that they seem to go back to 'time out' after they use the bathroom I would be fine with it. I tend to think as you noted that they may have had to go while playing and that may have caused the unwanted behavior in the first place.

[brandiewine11]

If they go back to their time out without a problem, I'd probably let them potty, especially if they were really actively playing before hand and have not gone recently.

However, since its both of them and frequently happens, I'm guessing they just learned to stall.

[critter015]

O does this whenever I try to make him nap. I do the same as you and it seems to work out fine.

[tj]

What a great point! I didn't even think of that. I obv wouldn't deny them using the potty. But I wondered if I should ask them to wait 3 minutes or not. I'll keep doing what I'm doing.