Baby Prefers Bottle Over Nursing

[orangehibiscus]

DD is just a bit over 6 months old, and she seems to be getting more frustrated with nursing. She will latch, suck a couple times, unlatch and start fussing. She doesn’t do this with her bedtime or her MOTN nursing feeds.

We supplement with formula because I don’t make what she needs, but it used to not be after every daytime feeding. We have been supplementing for just over 2 months. In the last week or 2, I have had to supplement more feedings during the day. Now we’re basically supplementing after every daytime feeding.

We are giving her puréed food, but usually only once a day (try to do twice on the weekend days). She eats puréed food, then nurses, and then I’m still having to supplement with formula after that.

Has anyone dealt with this? Will this cycle continue until she self weans? Some days I’m so over nursing/pumping, but the vast majority of the time I feel that I’m not ready to stop. Any ideas or thoughts?

[Eames]

Ugh, I'm sorry that is frustrating. Could she be getting frustrated waiting for letdown? Could you use a hand pump or something to get things flowing, then put her on? Might be that she is more relaxed at bedtime and night, looking more for comfort and not nutrition, so that is why she's not getting frustrated with lack of quick milk at those times.

I am EP still and I tried to latch one of my guys on the other day, just to see. He screamed and was so confused. It made me sad and have feels about it all. Generally I'm fine with the decision to EP, for us it made things so much easier. But I still wonder if we could have turned it around if we tried harder early on. Damn nipple shields, lol.

Typically my advice is one day at a time and it doesn't have to be all or nothing. I've known people that continued to nurse at night and do formula when they are at work, or all other sorts of arrangements. But I know how frustrating it can be when babies fuss at the breast. 😭

[jewelsofthenile]

There could be some level of distractable baby going on too. My boobs have a quick let down, but N. still will only nurse for a couple minutes sometimes because there are just too many other things to look at. After 5 minutes of the on off game I close up shop because If she is starving she stays focused. But on weekends I would say a lot of her best nursing happens when she is with me nursing in her room before a nap or bed...so much more limited distractions. I have never had babies that I fed bottles regularly, I do enough pumping at work so evening and weekends I nurse, if I am feeding them they get it straight from the source so I may just not put together that they prefer bottles over nursing because I not around to see them taking bottles. There is no wrong way to feed your baby so what feels/works best is what I would do. And there is not harm in experimenting with your routine. Your body will adjust.

[orangehibiscus]

Sept 30, 2019 6:30:22 GMT -6 Eames said:

Ugh, I'm sorry that is frustrating. Could she be getting frustrated waiting for letdown? Could you use a hand pump or something to get things flowing, then put her on? Might be that she is more relaxed at bedtime and night, looking more for comfort and not nutrition, so that is why she's not getting frustrated with lack of quick milk at those times.

I am EP still and I tried to latch one of my guys on the other day, just to see. He screamed and was so confused. It made me sad and have feels about it all. Generally I'm fine with the decision to EP, for us it made things so much easier. But I still wonder if we could have turned it around if we tried harder early on. Damn nipple shields, lol.

Typically my advice is one day at a time and it doesn't have to be all or nothing. I've known people that continued to nurse at night and do formula when they are at work, or all other sorts of arrangements. But I know how frustrating it can be when babies fuss at the breast. 😭

I don’t feel let down at all, so I have no idea when it happens. It is possible that she’s frustrated waiting for let down. Do you pump during the night too?

[orangehibiscus]

Sept 30, 2019 13:55:56 GMT -6 jewelsofthenile said:

There could be some level of distractable baby going on too. My boobs have a quick let down, but N. still will only nurse for a couple minutes sometimes because there are just too many other things to look at. After 5 minutes of the on off game I close up shop because If she is starving she stays focused. But on weekends I would say a lot of her best nursing happens when she is with me nursing in her room before a nap or bed...so much more limited distractions. I have never had babies that I fed bottles regularly, I do enough pumping at work so evening and weekends I nurse, if I am feeding them they get it straight from the source so I may just not put together that they prefer bottles over nursing because I not around to see them taking bottles. There is no wrong way to feed your baby so what feels/works best is what I would do. And there is not harm in experimenting with your routine. Your body will adjust.

I think she’s is definitely distracted at times. It doesn’t seem to matter where she nurses (even in our bedroom, which I would consider a “boring” room) as far as how distracted she is. It seems to be a combo of distraction and frustration I think. I’m not sure how to fix it or if there is even a way to fix it.

[jewelsofthenile]

I would guess if she is frustrated with waiting for milk maybe trying to get letdown to start before you latch her might help. But it's ok to only nurse at night if that's what works for you. I have always had good supply so I have never struggled with that. If my kids seemed not satisfied I just switched breasts until they were. But you have done 6 months and that's great, there is nothing wrong with doing what fits best if that's part time breastfeeding or full time formula feeding. Good luck with whatever you do.

[Eames]

orangehibiscus, I pump 6x a day, and one pump is in the middle of the night. The amount varies wildly depending on time of day. Usually I pump 8 to 14 oz (typically around 10 oz), and the twins take 4 to 6oz, usually 5 oz, per bottle.

I've been producing extra, like maybe 3 bottles extra per week, so I might shift and cut my evening pump around 5:30. I'm home solo with all 3 kids, boys are cranky, and it's so stressful. I have about 300 oz in the freezer and I think my other pumps will start to make up for it, but I'm not sure. I'm a little shocked this is still working, so I also don't want to mess with it, lol. Right now, pumping at 3 am, 6 am, 10 am, 2 pm, 5:30 pm, and 8:30 or 9 pm. At some point I want to taper before age 1.

Their schedule has really gotten pinned down, as follows:

6 to 6:30 am: 4-6 oz wakeup bottle (more for the guy STTN)
8 am: purees (rice/oatmeal and fruit) at daycare
9 am: 5 oz bottles followed by their morning nap
12 am: 5 oz bottle and "lunch" purees, afternoon nap afterwards
3 pm: 5 oz bottle after waking up
6 pm: 5-7 oz bottle, I start with 5 and give more if they want it
6:30 pm: "dinner" purees or I'll do a BLW item or something in their mesh pouches while we eat dinner

That's it for one guy, he's been STTN. The other guy still gets 4 oz around 3 AM.

This week we've mostly cut the last cat nap around dinner. Bedtime was getting too pushed back. It actually seems fine although it seems early for 2 naps per day to me.

[Eames]

Woah, sorry for the wall of text on your topic, orangehibiscus. I thought I was in the randoms thread!

[orangehibiscus]

Oct 4, 2019 7:56:49 GMT -6 Eames said:

Woah, sorry for the wall of text on your topic, orangehibiscus. I thought I was in the randoms thread!

Haha that’s ok! I’ll hella impressed by your pumping! Way to go.

Unfortunately I can tell that my supply is dropping even more. I went 6 hours without nursing or pumping, and I wasn’t hurting. I fear this is the end of nursing for me.

Honestly, I think I’m ready to be done. I’m not sleeping well at night, and I’m getting fed up with sharing my physical person with someone else. I feel so guilty for feeling this way, but I can’t help it. I do want to stop nursing and I also don’t. I feel so torn. If my milk dries up then I guess I don’t have much of a choice though.

[Eames]

orangehibiscus, you stop that right now!

There is NO reason to feel guilty. You made it quite awhile, and formula is really really great today. None of this will matter in the future, I promise.

With that said, I get having the feels about it. I really do. But you have nothing to regret and you've done awesome.

Whatever you choose is perfect, do that and don't look back.

[orangehibiscus]

Oct 5, 2019 6:37:37 GMT -6 Eames said:

orangehibiscus, you stop that right now!

There is NO reason to feel guilty. You made it quite awhile, and formula is really really great today. None of this will matter in the future, I promise.

With that said, I get having the feels about it. I really do. But you have nothing to regret and you've done awesome.

Whatever you choose is perfect, do that and don't look back.

Thank you so much! I really appreciate your kind words!

[jacks]

orangehibiscus I completely understand your feeling of guilt. With DD1, I drug the painful process out way too long. I was pumping and getting about 1.5oz total. The stress of pumping and choosing formula was really weighing on me.

But about a week after I fully weaned, the fog lifted and I looked around and realized DD1 loved me the same and was happy and healthy, it was just a huge weight lifted.

I hope that whenever the time to wean comes for you, you can be at peace with the decision. While breast milk has tons of great benefits, that doesn’t mean that formula isn’t also a great option.

[orangehibiscus]

Thank you jacks!!

I decided to stop pumping at work and just nurse in the evenings/early mornings. I didn’t pump at all this week, and it was so nice and freeing!

DD doesn’t seem to have noticed that she’s not getting bottles of breast milk anymore, but I think the formula has made her more gassy!

I feel so much better mentally not pumping at work!