It's FRIDAY!

[inthekitty]

Gah. I'm nervous as fuck. My aunt left me a message to call her. She's never done that before--ever. My mind immediately went to my grandma and thinking she was going to tell me she died. I couldn't reach her when I tried to call. I called my mom and she said something weird has been going on at my father's house so maybe it's him. I hope my grandma is okay.

[flamingo]

Feb 22, 2019 13:35:26 GMT -6 guster said:

I’m watching Superstore a little each night. It is so light. Perfect before bed.

We don’t watch it consistently but every now and then we’ll catch an episode. I like it. We also sometimes watch Everybody Loves Raymond (so relatable with young kids) or The Office reruns before bed, too.

[flamingo]

Feb 22, 2019 13:45:59 GMT -6 jewels said:

Feb 22, 2019 13:20:12 GMT -6 inthekitty said:

FFFC that while I would have a hard time leaving my kids for that long (but have done for work) I'm whatevs about leaving my husband for...let's say a week? Obligatory I love him, blah, blah, blah, but sometimes it's nice to have a break.

Because of the nature of my relationship, I don't bat an eye at being away from MH for that long.  We were long distance for years before moving in together and even then, he kept his job 3 hours away and was gone M-Th until he changed jobs when S was about 18 months.  I've always been independent anyway, and I think that our relationship works better that way.  

A few years ago my SIL's H had to go away to take care of his mother for a few days and she was freaking out that they hadn't spent a night apart.  Ever.  I find that... unusual.  Esp. since she was in her late 30's when they met so had been alone for quite sometime before then. 

I feel this way, too. H and I have done a year apart (with one 10-day visit at the halfway point) so anything less is fine, ha. We calculated in the two years we lived here previously (as newlyweds), DH was gone for well over half of it.

My mom was on her own a lot with us because my dad traveled on business so much, and I think a big part of her really enjoyed running the show and being able to do things on her own schedule. I think bc that’s how I grew up it’s very normal to me to have a spouse that travels.

[mwhip]

I hope everything is okay inthekitty and you hear back quickly!

[kim22]

tgrimes Happy Birthday!

[kim22]

guster my favorite part of Superstore is the random people they show doing weird things in the background.

[tgrimes]

Feb 22, 2019 13:58:25 GMT -6 inthekitty said:

Gah. I'm nervous as fuck. My aunt left me a message to call her. She's never done that before--ever. My mind immediately went to my grandma and thinking she was going to tell me she died. I couldn't reach her when I tried to call. I called my mom and she said something weird has been going on at my father's house so maybe it's him. I hope my grandma is okay.

I hope she's okay.

[cagoldi]

FX everything is alright with your grandma, inthekitty.

[inthekitty]

PDQ.

Welp, I haven't heard back from my aunt yet but my mom did some investigating (small town and she knows everyone...she can always get to the bottom of things). It's my father who died. And has probably been dead in his house for some time. I don't need sympathy. My dad was a giant asshole and has been dead in my mind for a long time...but it's kind of weird that it's actually official? He's done so many stupid things in his life that should have killed him a long time ago and taken off for long periods of time and people thought he was dead, but now it's actually happened. So I feel weird, but not sad.

I'm not angry yet but probably will be because in the midst of my mom's investigating she found out he owned 14 properties in town. They had to have been hidden because the only known property was his house and long story short my dad owed my mom $$$ back child support. The state cannot take his sole residence but they sure as hell could have taken his other properties to pay off his debts so they must not have known about them. Now we need to be prepared for a possible legal battle as my aunts and uncles might try to sell his properties from underneath us and take what should rightfully go to my mom first and then to me and my siblings. (They are all very wealthy and we were the poor kids in the family because my sack of shit dad never supported us in any way.) So I'm prepared for this to turn into an ugly mess. I know this sounds weird, but even at 36 I don't feel adult enough to deal with this shit.

Including stepchildren, this will be my grandma's 3rd child to die before her so I think the heartbreak will probably mean her death is imminent.

[inthekitty]

Fuck I suddenly have so much energy I want to run. I never want to run.

[kim22]

xolastunicornxo glad to see you here.

[kim22]

inthekitty I’m sorry you will have to deal with that mess. I hope you all get what you deserve.

[cagoldi]

Oh my goodness, that’s so wild, inthekitty. I’m sorry the extent of your dad’s dysfunction is kind of coming down full force so suddenly. That’s definitely going to create some feelings that are weird to try to navigate.

It seems hard to lose a parent when you didn’t have a good relationship because then it’s so final knowing there is never going to be any resolution.

Hope you can find a way to take it easy and wrap your head around everything today.

[tgrimes]

inthekitty I'm so sorry for the shit storm you're about to endure with everything.

[Sunny41]

inthekitty that is definitely a situation where emotions are all over the place. He sounds a lot like my coworkers ex so I understand the thoughts and him being dead to you. I pray it doesn't bring out the worst in your family

[guster]

Feb 22, 2019 14:02:03 GMT -6 flamingo said:

Feb 22, 2019 13:35:26 GMT -6 guster said:

I’m watching Superstore a little each night. It is so light. Perfect before bed.

We don’t watch it consistently but every now and then we’ll catch an episode. I like it. We also sometimes watch Everybody Loves Raymond (so relatable with young kids) or The Office reruns before bed, too.

Same. I’m not binging it, but it feels familiar in the way The Office or Parks and Rec does.

[guster]

Feb 22, 2019 14:08:26 GMT -6 kim22 said:

guster my favorite part of Superstore is the random people they show doing weird things in the background.

We were just commenting on this last night. It’s such a funny little piece of the comedy.

[guster]

I’m sorry, inthekitty.

[tallb]

Oh gosh inthekitty. Go for a run, get the rage out. Makes me angry for your mom and you.

[klong11]

I'm sorry inthekitty.

[lahdeedah]

inthekitty So sorry for what’s ahead of you and for your Grandma. Is this the part of your family that was at the wedding you went to in the past year? I know you don’t need it, but hugs friend.

[jewels]

Ugh inthekitty that's a lot to process. I hope that everyone does what's right and your mom gets what's rightfully hers.

[trtlcrzy]

Feb 22, 2019 13:42:51 GMT -6 lahdeedah said:

It’s been a busy Friday for me. I’m working all day, and wishing I didn’t offer to stay longer than my usual half day. I could use some down time.

Hope everyone has been having a Good Friday. Anyone else in the 80s today? I want to to warm up, but I wasn’t ready for 80s already!

Rub it in why don’t you! I would love to get to the 40s at this point. We are supposed to get a bunch more snow this weekend. I really need to move south.

[trtlcrzy]

inthekitty I’m sorry. I hope things aren’t too crazy between your aunts/uncles and you.

[trtlcrzy]

Happy birthday tgrimes! Treat yo self!

[tgrimes]

trtlcrzy How is H today?

[trtlcrzy]

Still living in recovery land here. H has been more active today so that’s positive. I am getting kind of obsessive into seed starting/ gardening stuff. I really need spring to come. I just learned about this new to me technique where you sprinkle seeds on the snow and they melt into the soil and come up in the spring. I have done that with 2 kinds of seeds and I’m very excited to see if it actually works for me. I started a few different kinds of seed and have them under grow lights in the basement.

[trtlcrzy]

Feb 22, 2019 15:18:59 GMT -6 tgrimes said:

trtlcrzy How is H today?

Pretty good. Seems to be doing a little better with drinking.

[inthekitty]

Feb 22, 2019 15:05:19 GMT -6 lahdeedah said:

inthekitty So sorry for what’s ahead of you and for your Grandma. Is this the part of your family that was at the wedding you went to in the past year? I know you don’t need it, but hugs friend.

Yes it is. My family's story could be a telenovela. There are 2 sets of aunts and uncles that are most closely involved that likely knew about my father's assets. One of them are greedy assholes and always have been. The other are a couple that I know have been complicit in a lot of dirty deeds over the years, but at the same time I still love them very much. They are the parents of the cousin's wedding I went to. I love my aunt, but damn if greed hasn't won out for her so many times over the years. Things are complicated with my grandma too because as much as I love her she's always thought my dad shouldn't be responsible for us in any way and hid $ from my mom over the years and reneged on promises to help me out when I was a kid.

tallb I did go for a run! I'm soaking wet now but don't care. My boss isn't here today so I'm just biding my time and will leave early. I think I'll go down to the TKD studio and punch shit.


@everyone thank you for the kind words and thoughts.

[flamingo]

Oh wow inthekitty that's a lot, I'm so sorry you will have to deal with all this. Doesn't sound like it, but maybe (miraculously) your dad's extended family will do the right thing.