Passive aggressive notes in the workplace (pic)

[ripper]

Please don't quote, as this is from my actual workplace.  

It's long, but funny.  We have a REAL and ongoing problem with people leaving food in the sink after washing their dishes.  This note was posted in the kitchen on my floor.




The guy who wrote this is the person who has to clean the sink when shit gets clogged, so it's cool (IMO) that he spent so much time on this.  

[blabbermouth]

TLDR Chris.

[blabbermouth]

I can appreciate the lamination though.

[Dr. Cox]

All I can think of is Pam and the microwave incident from The Office. I have a feeling it’s going to get worse before it gets better for him.

[mothafuckinteatime]

I saw this on Reddit the other day and lost my shit.

[spacecadet]

Nov 16, 2018 13:13:58 GMT -6 blabbermouth said:

I can appreciate the lamination though.

That was my first thought too. He laminated it and everything, he must mean business.

[soup]

OMG that somebody is putting bones in the sink.

You work with barbarians.

[ttcbabyj]

Lamination, research and evidence to support his claims...A+

[soup]

Nov 16, 2018 13:17:18 GMT -6 mothafuckinteatime said:

I saw this on Reddit the other day and lost my shit. 

I see what you did there.

[Dr. Cox]

Nov 16, 2018 13:18:30 GMT -6 soup said:

OMG that somebody is putting bones in the sink.

You work with barbarians.

I’m just going to assume someone hates Chris.

[lucilleaustero]

Nov 16, 2018 13:17:18 GMT -6 mothafuckinteatime said:

I saw this on Reddit the other day and lost my shit.

Apparently, so did the person that used the bathroom. 

[lonefox]

Have done. #TeamChris

[Deleted]

Someone once clogged our work sink by shoving the coffee grounds AND FILTER into the drain.

[ladybrienne]

I am at a fucking eleven. WHO LEAVES CHICKEN BONES IN THE WORK SINK?!?!?!?! NO. NO NO NO NO NO.

[sweptaway]

It never ceases to amaze me what heathens people are

[piratecat]

My old boss would leave passive aggressive drawings and there was one involving a sink drain too. My office manager used to collect these drawings - many of them were given directly to her - in a folder in her file cabinet and one day the folder was missing and she always suspected he had found it and took it.

[tgrimes]

That note is amazing.

One of my bosses used to leave his food in the sink and clog it up. He made the office buy a mesh drain cover because he apparently can not wipe out his dishes in the trash prior to using the sink to rinse them off. Ridiculous.

[STP]

Nope, too long. Wouldn’t read.

Learn to edit, Chris. This ain’t LOTR.

Which also should have been edited.

[leatherpants]

“ I sink we can all agree” killed me. Chris is a keeper

[STP]

Nov 16, 2018 14:00:41 GMT -6 tgrimes said:

That note is amazing.

One of my bosses used to leave his food in the sink and clog it up. He made the office buy a mesh drain cover because he apparently can not wipe out his dishes in the trash prior to using the sink to rinse them off. Ridiculous.

I mean, those are like $0.75, so meh.

[ripper]

Nov 16, 2018 14:08:55 GMT -6 leatherpants said:

“ I sink we can all agree” killed me. Chris is a keeper

He writes some great stuff.  

[earlybirdz]

St my last workplace if someone left any food containers, coffee mugs, etc in the sink I’d throw them away.

I agree it was passive aggressive but I’m good with it.

[ripper]

blabbermouth, leatherpants, STP,

Here is a shorter piece he wrote last year:

“Four scarves and seven earmuffs ago, our employees brought forth on this cubicle a lost pair of glasses, forgotten in a boardroom, and I became dedicated to the proposition that all lost items are created equal, and shall create an email.”

Hello all,

Two women’s rings (at least I would hope they belong to a woman, based on where they were found) have been returned to Office Services and are in need of some fingers to reside on. One ring is a sterling silver Möbius strip-looking wide band, while the other is a white gold number with a large blue gemstone—classic round brilliant cut—nestled beautifully among some smaller clear stones. If they belong to you, please come visit me in Office Services and say, “I do…want my rings back.”

Warmest regards,
Chris

[tgrimes]

Nov 16, 2018 14:09:09 GMT -6 STP said:

Nov 16, 2018 14:00:41 GMT -6 tgrimes said:

That note is amazing.

One of my bosses used to leave his food in the sink and clog it up. He made the office buy a mesh drain cover because he apparently can not wipe out his dishes in the trash prior to using the sink to rinse them off. Ridiculous.

I mean, those are like $0.75, so meh.

He still doesn't empty them out though.  It's pretty gross.

[veganontuesdays]

I definitely blacked out. Chris needs to find some good one liners and laminate those.

[earlybirdz]

Chris must have a lot of time on his hands. Witty though.

[ripper]

Oh- I love this one:

To my (now) ring-less co-worker,

Perhaps you’re just really passionate about the Olympics, or maybe you take your fashion cues from Mr. T., or it’s even possible you wanted to know how Phil Jackson felt back in 1997 when he won his fifth championship with the Chicago Bulls, heck, maybe you were even indebted to several hobbits and were actually right then on your way to Mordor; all I know is that five rings were found by the 7th floor kitchen sink and it’s my job to help them find their rightful owner.

The five rings appear to be silver (or some reasonable facsimile), and are all patterned differently; if you believe them to be yours, please come down to Office Services where we will perform a Cinderella-style fitting to ensure proper ownership so you can get your bling back where it belongs.

Give me a ring if you think they’re your rings,
Chris

[ripper]

And if you are a fan of Seinfeld - this is quite Perterman-esque:

An open letter to the woman who left her coat in the washroom:

I too, felt a renewed sense of vigor when I rose this morning to the relative warmth of the day, one thing I didn’t do, however, was abandon my coat in a washroom. Because, as is typical in Toronto, I know this welcome breath of spring will never last, and after a lifetime of weathering through Toronto springtimes, I know all too well that we’ll be back into those sub-zero temps by this weekend, if not earlier.

That said, I think you’ll certainly want your coat in the upcoming days, possibly even tomorrow morning, so I implore you to stop by Office Services before the end of the day to retrieve your black wool coat, complete with delightful genuine leather pocket details and belt, and a soft-as-kittens oversized faux fur collar. Together, we can speak of other, more figurative ways, to cast off the shackles of winter, such as changing your desktop wallpaper to a picture of a beach, or maybe eating an ice cream cone at your desk.

Help us help you stay warm.

Thanks,
Chris

[lucilleaustero]

Is Chris hot? In my mind, he is totally geek-hot.

[ripper]

Nov 16, 2018 14:25:34 GMT -6 lucilleaustero said:

Is Chris hot? In my mind, he is totally geek-hot.

He would be someone's type for sure.  He is also very funny/witty IRL as well as an extremely talented artist (drawing).  He is currently writing a pilot for an animated tv show for adults.  He's a treasure!