What's your favorite thing about being a mom?

[pinkcat]

I know most of our posters here are STM or TTMs so you will probably have more insight here , but even for us FTMs what is your favorite thing so far about being a mom? What has surprised you about being a mom? Are there anyways that you feel like you've changed since becoming a mom? 

[watermelonseed]

I’ll play

My favorite is the unconditional love you receive and give.

What has surprised me is how much of an overall life adjustment being a parent really is. Both in the good and not as great ways.

I would say I have changed the most in what actually matters to me. Although I had PPA for a bit with my first I am SO much more relaxed and don’t get as bothered about small things like I used to.

[pinkcat]

I think my favorite thing so far is just seeing how much he loves us and depends on us. I love watching him grow and learn things- it's so cool to watch him do something new for the first time. Even the smallest things, like being able to hold a toy he wasn't able to hold the day before, are just amazing to watch!

In terms of what surprised me, I have always been a pretty private person and did not think I'd enjoy breastfeeding or that I would be fine nursing in public. It phases me so little now to have my boobs out and my family is always laughing with me about it because it's the opposite of how I thought I would be!

Another surprise has been how tough it is to feel always "on" 100% of the time- constantly thinking about if he ate enough, pooped enough, if he's teething, if he's meeting his milestones, when he needs to eat next, if what I ate that day bothered his tummy, etc. I miss the days when I could just sit in front of the TV or a book and not have the a separate stream of thought going the whole time!

[pinkcat]

Oh another surprise- I didn't realize how sad the passing of time would make me, while making me simultaneously happy as well. I remember crying when we left the hospital because he was "already" two days old and time was going by so fast, and I feel like it keeps just going faster and faster. I'm so sad that all of the newborn snuggles are already behind us and I miss him being so tiny, but it is also so fun to watch him change and grow. It's such a confusing feeling to be so happy and sad about it at the same time!

[tiffrobot]

What is your favorite thing so far about being a mom?
Watching them play, visit, live life together. Oh man, seeing the big two choose to either take care of their baby sister or each other is so cute. And to watch your kids have real conversations with each other, or choose to randomly cuddle with each other at times, is quite the feeling.


What has surprised you about being a mom?
After DS was born I remember how humbling it was.
I’m surprised at how hard the toddler stages are, even though you hear it, to experience it is another. Lol.
Some of the things that now spike my anxiety have also surprised me.

Are there anyways that you feel like you've changed since becoming a mom?
Third time around, I can’t believe how much stronger and confident of a person I am. Not just a mom-but as a person in general. I find it easier to say what I want to say, do what I want to do, and just do whatever it is that genuinely makes me happy. Even with some anxiety creeping in here and there, I have felt a lot of personal growth with each kid.

[rebeccabunch]

Favorite things:

Watching my kids develop their own unique interests and personalities. Conquering learning (writing, letters, etc)and physical milestones like potty train, riding a bike etc. those moments where everyone is really enjoying themselves while being a family and holiday traditions!

Surprise:

What a slog I find all the constant care and mommying I need... mommy I want.... how many breaks I need from it. I love my children with all my heart but I’m not always in love with the constant care if I’m honest. It doesn’t fulfill me the way I would’ve thought when I was say 22.

My husband and I are much better co parents than I could’ve imagined. Our division of labor really works for me.

I can’t care to the max about everything. Yes I buy organic food but my kids eat hot dogs, they know what a Happy meal is, TV is my Baby sitter sometimes when I’m nursing or need to do chores.

How it’s changed me:

Better perspective on things. I’m better at my job because I manage my time better, A+ multitasker now, everything is not a level 10 emergency/problem. I’m a better problem solver.

[aprilz81]

My favorite is watching her smile and figure out something new.

I'm surprised at how easily (relatively speaking) I've adapted to the change in routine, the new responsibilities and general upheaval of our lives. I have bad moments and days, sure, but overall it has been a smooth transition. My nature is inherently selfish. I want to sleep when I want to sleep, I want to do what I want to do and kids turn that upside down.

[Queen Mamadala]

I don't have a favorite. There are a lot of things that I cherish or find really fascinating. Watching them develop and discover new things, grow into their own personalities and quirks, explore new interests and hobbies, hone skills and talents. Becoming socially conscious and aware kids, at least my older two kids. Engaging and interacting with them and building trust and open communication. Sharing common interests and hobbies and family traditions. Passing on aspects of my culture. Of course the cuddles, smiles, giggles, milestones, and other nuances. Realizing how different each kid is and how their unique identity, personality, idiosyncrasies shape the parent-child dynamic.

As much as I cherish the early stages, I really, really enjoy older kid and preteen and teen stages. I vividly remember having a two hour conversation with my then-11 year old dd1 asking for input on whether to stay in my grad program or pursue a different program. We talked and talked. And when she was in 6th grade she came home with an idea for a story (she writes a lot of fantasy and dystopian fiction) and we both brainstormed ideas for hours and started a rough draft for a screenplay. She later wrote in a card how much she appreciated and cherished those conversations and quality time. I make sure to make them feel included in my life, not just as a parent, but as a person. I discuss my wants, needs, goals, struggles, passions. I want them to know me not just as mom, but as an individual. And the same for them. I really love the talks I have with my older kids and doing things together. We nerd/geek out a lot and have a lot of shared interests. And having that bond where they still come to me for talks and confide and share things with me. My oldest texts me while at school during lunch break and in between classes. A lot of silly texts, but it's cute. And both girls come to me when they have questions or concerns. They trust my knowledge and judgment. 

I think the main thing that surprised me, or what I've find so interesting and fascinating, is how different they can be. I think this really hit when my dd3 was a toddler. So spirited, intense, witty, precocious, demanding, bubbly, snarky, outgoing, talkative, etc. Like, holy spirit, the complete opposite of her sisters. My older two were quiet, mild-mannered, agreeable, introverted, etc. And they still are. I wondered whether girls are easier, because my ds2 was so, so difficult as a toddler and preschooler. Three was awful. So when dd3 came around, I kind of thought she'd be like her sisters. Not.at.all. This child. I swear. Adore her to pieces. She's incredibly bright, gifted, funny, inquisitive, sweet, empathetic, and kind. But she is a lot. I remember telling my husband that after having a few kids that I'd experienced a decent variety of personalities, temperaments and quirks, so what else could there be? Bahahaha. Ruby is something else, and perhaps it feels that way to us because she is the only extrovert in a house full of introverts.

So when people say they come in a variety of flavors and varieties, it's true.