piratecat
Diamond
Posts: 36,035 Likes: 143,912 
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Post by piratecat on Jun 6, 2018 11:40:56 GMT -6
Like the woman from HR who would use a horribly inappropriate Chinese accent when we ordered Chinese food for takeout. That one stopped me dead in my tracks. Oh gosh. |
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loony
Emerald
Posts: 12,589 Likes: 45,028
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Post by loony on Jun 6, 2018 11:43:57 GMT -6
The full time position that we need to create had been altered so significantly by the previous office holder that he literally was the only person in the world that could have filled it. So it's been a year of rewriting the description, getting it passed by admin and the board of directors and re-budgeting. (They need to get their shit together, because I WANT that job).
He also would just randomly add responsibilities, and then change policies, and then change them back. SO MANY LABELS and TAPE on everything. We literally had a cleansing and tore down all the random signs he had posted everywhere. The walls were like a 13 year old's bedroom with posters, signs, pictures, quotes etc.
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Post by justbecause on Jun 6, 2018 11:44:06 GMT -6
Like the woman from HR who would use a horribly inappropriate Chinese accent when we ordered Chinese food for takeout. That one stopped me dead in my tracks. Oh gosh. They did not even fire her. She ended up quitting.... |
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quinn
Amethyst
Posts: 5,064 Likes: 17,858
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Post by quinn on Jun 6, 2018 11:47:09 GMT -6
Well, as an ex-stripper I have some intense work stories. Many fights, one girl dragged another girl by her hair in the bathroom, then nonchalantly dragged her across the floor, all around the stage, to the locker room. Many extensions were pulled during backroom fights. A girl threw her shoe at another girl while on stage. I could go on for days.
I would say the craziest was when someone got stabbed. A famous motorcycle club would often hang out there. And there was a stabbing on the back deck. Everyone quickly dispersed and it was like nothing happened 5 mins later
I have so many crazy stories, I should also write a book
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claudia
Sapphire
Posts: 4,516 Likes: 43,995
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Post by claudia on Jun 6, 2018 11:49:42 GMT -6
One of our clients just dropped off flowers for my boss. Red roses. My boss is a 55 year old guy. Client is an 87 year old lady. My head canon is that she is madly in love with him.
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bobyn
Diamond
local baby-making menace
Posts: 26,962
Likes: 165,630
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Post by bobyn on Jun 6, 2018 11:52:14 GMT -6
I've shared this before, but I'm still shaking my head about it. PDQ
A former coworker of mine was allowed to resign after she put explicit content on her work calendar. She was out of the office but didn't tell anyone, so when her boss went to her calendar to see where she was, she found an email from the coworker's boyfriend copied into the blocked time.
The email outlined *in detail* what he planned to do to her during this "meeting".
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Post by Deleted on Jun 6, 2018 11:52:50 GMT -6
Once the restaurant owner and I had to address the performance of a line cook. The kid was apprenticing, but was just a cocky asshole. He always tried to undermine me (I was the sous)and make me look stupid. It was right before dinner service and we pulled him into the (empty) dining room. Owner used the F word, kid announced he wasn't going to tolerate being sworn at, and walked out. I remember it was like 3:00pm on Valentine's Day.
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Post by wesleycrusher on Jun 6, 2018 11:54:19 GMT -6
I worked at psychiatric hospital for many years, so have seen a lot of wild things from both staff and patients. I've told this story before but I had a co-worker when I was in college write a sex story using my name and the name of another coworker (my name is fairly uncommon). Both me and the male coworker in the story had started at the job a few weeks before, and the characters were basically descriptions of us. The best part was when she sat down across for me and gave it to me to read, then asked "so what did you think?" afterwards. This story then went up on her myspace page. This same coworker also wrote a guide for performing oral sex on women and saved it on out work computer, and it was found by our manager years later when they updated all the computers (but coworker was long gone by then). People were caught having sex on the unit (right before I started but it was a huge deal). We had a pt who bit their own tongue off and would spit pieces at staff. A pt on another floor while I was there ripped out their eyeballs. This is just the tip of the iceberg- lots of gross and sad things. meggriffin I had friend who ordered Chinese food, and ate half and left the other half with his name on it for the next day. He came in the next day and someone had eaten all the chicken out of his half-eaten chicken and broccoli and left the rice and veggies. |
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bobyn
Diamond
local baby-making menace
Posts: 26,962
Likes: 165,630
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Post by bobyn on Jun 6, 2018 11:56:24 GMT -6
I won’t be here for much longer so I’m just going to let it be what it is. Aren't you in a flirtation with another coworker? Does old lady see this or are y'all super discreet? |
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Post by mothafuckinteatime on Jun 6, 2018 11:57:08 GMT -6
When I managed a bar one of my assistant managers fucked a waitress on a pool table about 30 minutes after closing.
I found out when the mall cop mentioned seeing them through the windows when I was opening the next morning.
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Post by mothafuckinteatime on Jun 6, 2018 11:58:17 GMT -6
@gentleapricot
I can’t believe you’re doing “Shaun” so dirty, after all he’s done for you. 😂
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Post by Deleted on Jun 6, 2018 12:02:17 GMT -6
I won’t be here for much longer so I’m just going to let it be what it is. Aren't you in a flirtation with another coworker? Does old lady see this or are y'all super discreet? We are super discreet. We went out Monday night from 6pm-11pm and on Tuesday we had a staff meeting, walked by each other and he said “Hey! Long time no see. They must be keeping you busy up there”. |
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bobyn
Diamond
local baby-making menace
Posts: 26,962
Likes: 165,630
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Post by bobyn on Jun 6, 2018 12:03:26 GMT -6
Aren't you in a flirtation with another coworker? Does old lady see this or are y'all super discreet? We are super discreet. We went out Monday night from 6pm-11pm and on Tuesday we had a staff meeting, walked by each other and he said “Hey! Long time no see. They must be keeping you busy up there”. Oh, he's good... |
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quinn
Amethyst
Posts: 5,064 Likes: 17,858
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Post by quinn on Jun 6, 2018 12:05:12 GMT -6
wesleycrusher omg that must have been such a difficult job to have. Spitting tongue out!? 😖
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Post by Deleted on Jun 6, 2018 12:07:04 GMT -6
We are super discreet. We went out Monday night from 6pm-11pm and on Tuesday we had a staff meeting, walked by each other and he said “Hey! Long time no see. They must be keeping you busy up there”. Oh, he's good... We do meet in the lobby before going to lunch, but I don’t think that screams “they must be fucking”, which we aren’t btw. |
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loony
Emerald
Posts: 12,589 Likes: 45,028
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Post by loony on Jun 6, 2018 12:25:54 GMT -6
If you ever move to a new desk/office, always check under the desk. A few years ago I worked with a guy who apparently used the underside of his desk as a tissue. A new employee moved to the desk when he left and was on the floor plugging something in and looked up to see his boogers smeared allllll over the underside. 😬  Gross. The desk I'm at now was pretty gross too. The lady who sat here before ate and drank and spilled all over the desk. She was kind of a hot mess to begin with, so it was not shocking. I definitely took a lysol wipe to everything and requested a new keyboard during my first week. |
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quinn
Amethyst
Posts: 5,064 Likes: 17,858
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Post by quinn on Jun 6, 2018 12:29:11 GMT -6
If you ever move to a new desk/office, always check under the desk. A few years ago I worked with a guy who apparently used the underside of his desk as a tissue. A new employee moved to the desk when he left and was on the floor plugging something in and looked up to see his boogers smeared allllll over the underside. 😬 ewwwwww 🤢 |
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Post by Deleted on Jun 6, 2018 12:37:37 GMT -6
A young woman wore a see through dress to work one day.
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Post by shitsngiggles on Jun 6, 2018 12:42:43 GMT -6
My First Office Job Was an internship at my dad's office. There was an older lady who would fill her mug with coffee before she left and leave it in her filling cabinet to drink the next morning. She even did it on Friday to drink on Monday.
She also farted audibly when she walked.
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piratecat
Diamond
Posts: 36,035 Likes: 143,912
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Post by piratecat on Jun 6, 2018 12:56:41 GMT -6
My First Office Job Was an internship at my dad's office. There was an older lady who would fill her mug with coffee before she left and leave it in her filling cabinet to drink the next morning. She even did it on Friday to drink on Monday. She also farted audibly when she walked. Why?? She specifically wanted to drink old coffee? |
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Post by blablabirdie on Jun 6, 2018 13:22:58 GMT -6
1) One boss I had said 'We would have a staff party if there were enough recyclable cans collected to pay for it'. We had guests that often left their recyclable cans -- but we had worked like crazy that season and I worked with museum education not recycling.
2) I had one boss that was a hoarder. I was responsible for thinning the hoard when she wasn't looking. For example, she told the cleaning lady that we needed extra paper towels because we always ran out. So every day the cleaning lady left two extra packages of paper towels for the bathrooms in our office. There was, literally, one of our own staff stockings closet FULL of extra paper towels. We NEVER needed to restock paper towels during the day. The most I could convince her was to downgrade to one extra pack and I may have also showed the cleaning lady our secret stash so at least she could take from there and give back to us. After I gave my notice I went on a big passive aggressive throw away campaign and threw away sooooo much crap (Half of her Oregano packets she got from a local pizza restaurant that looked like a strange dime bag collection -- which amounted to like 50 bags of oregano), worksheets that had not seen the light of day since the early 90s, and more.
3) I worked with one women that, when wearing sandals, would pick the skin off her feet, during our coffee breaks.
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Post by shitsngiggles on Jun 6, 2018 13:27:52 GMT -6
My First Office Job Was an internship at my dad's office. There was an older lady who would fill her mug with coffee before she left and leave it in her filling cabinet to drink the next morning. She even did it on Friday to drink on Monday. She also farted audibly when she walked. Why?? She specifically wanted to drink old coffee? No idea. She did it for years. I think maybe she didn't want to have to make a pot in the morning. |
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jorkzy
Emerald
Posts: 13,786 Likes: 73,501
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Post by jorkzy on Jun 6, 2018 13:41:55 GMT -6
I had a coworker who used to floss her teeth at her desk. In our open office.
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Post by angelashly on Jun 6, 2018 13:55:39 GMT -6
We do meet in the lobby before going to lunch, but I don’t think that screams “they must be fucking”, which we aren’t btw.I am slightly disappointed |
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Post by chickenonsunday on Jun 6, 2018 14:20:29 GMT -6
Why?? She specifically wanted to drink old coffee? No idea. She did it for years. I think maybe she didn't want to have to make a pot in the morning. Didn't Lucky Dad drink day old coffee as well? |
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thatgolfb
Unicorn
Posts: 55,023 Likes: 234,914
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Post by thatgolfb on Jun 6, 2018 14:34:55 GMT -6
I had a coworker at my former company that would go upstairs to the still under renovation office area and read Harry potter for hours on end, or sometimes sleep.
He was eventually fired for that plus other things, and he wrote a threateneing email to one of the bosses when it happened (I wasnt there for this, I was on vacation, so I heard about it when I got back).
I actually carpooled with him for a while before his crazy showed. 😬
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thatgolfb
Unicorn
Posts: 55,023 Likes: 234,914
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Post by thatgolfb on Jun 6, 2018 14:36:43 GMT -6
My boss asked me to put in our company manual that she prefers cowboy boots over dress shoes for the men. I declined. Lol this one is cracking me up. |
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Post by cakewench on Jun 6, 2018 14:49:24 GMT -6
I used to be a chef and then got promoted to restaurant manager. I could write a book. My H and BIL are both in hotels/restaurants. The stories they tell me... I swear it would be on the NYT best seller list for weeks. |
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Post by cakewench on Jun 6, 2018 14:53:55 GMT -6
I used to be a chef and then got promoted to restaurant manager. I could write a book. A coworker and I started one a few years ago. It was titled "Did you know there were mushrooms on the Mushroom Pizza?" Which was a verbatim question someone asked us. I could probably add a few chapters about co-workers as well. Context: Mother's Day brunch. Woman orders the chocolate waffles, then asks to see the manager (BIL) when it arrives. BIL: Is there a problem? Woman: Yes. There is chocolate on this waffle. BIL: Okay... Woman: I'm allergic to chocolate. |
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Post by Deleted on Jun 6, 2018 15:05:59 GMT -6
I, and my female coworkers, continue to be asked to take meeting minutes and “drive” (aka display, do live edits, etc) in meetings simply because we’re women..and as you know all admin tasks fall to the women folk because, boobs.
So that’s fun.
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Gross.
