More potty training questions- poop help

[McBenny]

Apr 3, 2018 10:58:19 GMT -6 valiente said:

I would try having her go naked on the weekends and try to catch her pooping and have her get/get her on the toilet before she gets it on the ground.

[lolacachia]

If she will immediately pee in a pull-up, then it doesn't sound like she is potty trained and I would just go back to pull ups and take the pressure off of all of you for now. And I would tell DC she just isn't ready and to leave it alone for awhile.

My kid is about to be 3 and is very clearly not willing aka not ready yet. Our families make comments about how I just need to force him. I'm like hello have you met him? I'm not putting either of us through that. And no thank you to cleaning shit pants on the daily.

[GhoatMonket]

Apr 4, 2018 9:05:16 GMT -6 McBenny said:

Apr 3, 2018 10:58:19 GMT -6 valiente said:

I would try having her go naked on the weekends and try to catch her pooping and have her get/get her on the toilet before she gets it on the ground.

Add this to your spreadsheet of things we agree on.

[milano]

My kid will be 4 in June. He's pretty good about peeing in the potty, very rarely he'll get caught up doing something and start going in his underwear. He's pooped in the potty a handful of times. He did it for a week straight last fall and we thought that we were in the clear and he was potty trained. Lol. Nope. He then went months without even being willing to try to poop in the potty again and then I just got him to go a couple weeks ago, once, by bribing him with a trip to the toy store.

When he feels like he has to poop he asks for a pull up and then he puts it on himself (I tell him that I'll give him a pull-up but he has to put it on by himself and then I just check it to make sure it's straight) and goes in his pooping spot in the living room and does his business. Then when he's done he asks to be changed. I get frustrated because he clearly knows he has to poop so why can't he just poop on the potty? But for whatever reason he's just not ready to do it so I'm trying to just be patient and ride it out and know that someday he will poop in the potty.

I don't know if this helps you at all other than just some commiseration and to say that there's nothing wrong with you as a parent because your kid is not potty trained yet. All kids are different and there's no window that can be missed. It's frustrating that there so much emphasis placed on potty training for preschools and daycares. Mine is starting a new preschool in the fall and is supposed to be potty trained, so if he's still pooping in a pull up at that time then whatever I'll just have to get him to poop when he's at home and not there.

[McBenny]

Apr 4, 2018 9:51:14 GMT -6 GhoatMonket said:

Apr 4, 2018 9:05:16 GMT -6 McBenny said:

Add this to your spreadsheet of things we agree on.

In every post I read of yours in this thread, there was nothing for me to add.

[normadix]

If my kid was having poop accidents everyday I would put him back in diapers until he was ready.

[nevertoomanyshoes]

Apr 4, 2018 9:17:36 GMT -6 lolacachia said:

My kid is about to be 3 and is very clearly not willing aka not ready yet. Our families make comments about how I just need to force him. I'm like hello have you met him? I'm not putting either of us through that. And no thank you to cleaning shit pants on the daily.

You are us at this point. My MIL suggested we teach him to pee in a jar. People make comments about making him and one of his daycare teachers started potty training him without telling us last year which led to anxiety holding both poop and pee. I was not impressed.

[millimeter314]

DD didn't want to poop in the potty and would sometimes refuse to pee in it, too. She didn't like the little potty or the potty seat so we ended up getting a new toilet seat that has the kids seat attached.

She also really wanted to start going to preschool and dance class. We told her if she didn't use the potty for pee and poop that she wouldn't be able to do it. She was very excited about making new friends and we told her she couldn't go be a big kid unless she went potty like a big kid.

When she would have an accident, she would have to take off her underwear, throw it in the laundry sink, put on a new pair, and use a paper towel to wipe up the floor (all with help).

She would get a sticker for her chart anytime she used the potty and for pooping she would get a Shopkin or something.

I knew she was ready, she just liked the pull-up and didn't want to stop playing to go to the bathroom. We didn't punish her for accidents, we were just vey matter of the fact. It took about two weeks of the above and she was trained and very proud of herself.

Good luck!

[macic]

Apr 4, 2018 10:30:54 GMT -6 normadix said:

If my kid was having poop accidents everyday I would put him back in diapers until he was ready.

Our GI dr had us talk to this “potty training” psychologist. She was very much against going back to pull ups since she has been pee trained for so long (and doing s
well with that).

But other than that and rewarding positive behavior, she didn’t have much other advice. (I was totally disappointed with her and the advice she had to offer).

[AmyG]

Apr 4, 2018 19:21:34 GMT -6 macic said:

Apr 4, 2018 10:30:54 GMT -6 normadix said:

If my kid was having poop accidents everyday I would put him back in diapers until he was ready.

Our GI dr had us talk to this “potty training” psychologist. She was very much against going back to pull ups since she has been pee trained for so long (and doing s
well with that).

But other than that and rewarding positive behavior, she didn’t have much other advice. (I was totally disappointed with her and the advice she had to offer).

If she didn't have any more actual advice, then I'm thinking she has no actual knowledge of this area of parenting.

I would suggest the potty seat that attaches to the regular toilet like mentioned above, that plus a step stool was success for us. But ONLY if you are sure she isn't thinking of her poop as a part of her body or the toilet is going to suck her down. or that the big toilet makes a scary noise or whatever. Kids can be very very anxious over toileting, and if the psychologist didn't address that at all, then find someone else who knows more, or listen to the "experts" here.

Backing off to using pull ups I would certainly do after talking to her about seriously how much easier it is to get cleaned up with the pull up instead of poop in the underwear.  See what she says, she may surprise you and decide that is enough of a reason to poop in the toilet.  or not.  Either way you release some of the stress.

[Deleted]

We have a friend at daycare who always would defer to her pediatrician for potty training tips. "Oh, daycare wants to potty train the kids by doing XXX, but I have to ask my pediatrician about that because I don't think she'll agree." (I only had a girl at the time, so I can't remember if it was having the boys sitting vs. standing or the other way around).

I just remember thinking... it's not a health issue, so I would personally rather listen to daycare who, by my estimates, works on potty training 40-60+ kids per year than a pediatrician who has probably potty trained 1-3.

[klong11]

Apr 4, 2018 18:39:36 GMT -6 nevertoomanyshoes said:

Apr 4, 2018 9:17:36 GMT -6 lolacachia said:

My kid is about to be 3 and is very clearly not willing aka not ready yet. Our families make comments about how I just need to force him. I'm like hello have you met him? I'm not putting either of us through that. And no thank you to cleaning shit pants on the daily.

You are us at this point. My MIL suggested we teach him to pee in a jar. People make comments about making him and one of his daycare teachers started potty training him without telling us last year which led to anxiety holding both poop and pee. I was not impressed.

Pee in a jar? What would that accomplish???

[cyprissa]

I would check out encopresis information is she has had prior constipation issues. She might associate pooping with pain and be holding it. What are the accidents like? Liquid or clay like? Sorry.