jkjacq
Ruby
Posts: 21,752 Likes: 94,434
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Post by jkjacq on Jul 26, 2022 13:32:57 GMT -6
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Post by goldenbird on Jul 26, 2022 14:38:31 GMT -6
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Minerva
Ruby
Posts: 15,381 Likes: 67,036
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Post by Minerva on Jul 26, 2022 14:40:32 GMT -6
klw, thank you for that moment of levity. 💀
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elle
Ruby
Posts: 18,064 Likes: 114,532
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Post by elle on Jul 26, 2022 14:43:10 GMT -6
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athn64
Ruby
Posts: 17,421 Likes: 76,763
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Post by athn64 on Jul 26, 2022 15:37:47 GMT -6
klw, quite the mistake! MH also got new swim trunks this year, but he went in a different direction
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sifl
Platinum
Posts: 1,410 Likes: 5,598
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Post by sifl on Jul 26, 2022 16:43:49 GMT -6
klw having been immersed in weed country the last 2 weeks, I barely blinked at that 😂
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clucky
Opal
Posts: 7,834 Likes: 32,884
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Post by clucky on Jul 26, 2022 16:58:37 GMT -6
I would be *shocked* if they called you. I've had kids who cried for hours the first day but we have nevvver sent a kid home unless they like, puked. The teachers know how to help kids who are nervous or having separation anxiety. She will do great!! Thats where my head went - like she got so upset that she puked from crying. But I know its a million to one because 1) she's never had any kind of separation anxiety, she normally doesn't even remember to give me a hug when I drop her at school/camp and 2) *knock on wood* she's never puked from crying (or even ever puked). The way my schedule works is that I work every third Saturday and am off on Tuesdays the week I work Saturday. So I just took off every Monday before the Tuesday I have off, for August-October. So for 3 months every 3 weeks I'll have a 4 day weekend. I already emailed a couple home organizers to help me get my shit together, once she's in school and I'll have child free days. Print off a family picture and put that in her backpack. Then you will be “with” her if she needs.
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kbw
Platinum
Posts: 1,214 Likes: 3,272
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Post by kbw on Jul 26, 2022 17:17:13 GMT -6
clucky you reminded me we did that for DS1 (he’d pull it out on the bus). I almost forgot to think about it for DS2.
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Post by carmensandiego on Jul 27, 2022 14:01:32 GMT -6
We've talked on here about our non-neurotypical kiddos. I am about half way through "The Sensory Child Gets Organized" by Carolyn Dalgiesh. I really like it so far. She breaks down different behavioral/social/emotional aspects of what may help kiddos. Some of it we are already doing, but it's nice to see it in a book.
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jaygee
Diamond
Posts: 28,342 Likes: 220,264
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Post by jaygee on Jul 27, 2022 23:55:24 GMT -6
We've talked on here about our non-neurotypical kiddos. I am about half way through "The Sensory Child Gets Organized" by Carolyn Dalgiesh. I really like it so far. She breaks down different behavioral/social/emotional aspects of what may help kiddos. Some of it we are already doing, but it's nice to see it in a book. Thanks for the rec. this sounds like a good listen for H and I. We are struggling with trying to help DS gain some life skills in the organization or really just not be a complete mess aspect. It comes naturally for us and very clearly not for him.
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Post by Wtfshouldmynamebe on Jul 30, 2022 17:47:00 GMT -6
I hate dropping this in a random, but I prefer it on this board. I found out yesterday that my dad’s cancer is back. My dad also has severe dementia. I am not sad. I am relieved. My mom feels the same way, which makes us think we are horrible people.
I have already started preparing my kids. My oldest is autistic, so while he has almost no connection to my dad(it’s complicated, but my dad never could connect with him and is a dick) he is trying to understand how to process the emotions.
My youngest did connect with my dad, but understands it all. He’s 11 and I think he will be fine.
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richard
Emerald
Posts: 13,699 Likes: 128,724
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Post by richard on Jul 30, 2022 18:12:17 GMT -6
I hate dropping this in a random, but I prefer it on this board. I found out yesterday that my dad’s cancer is back. My dad also has severe dementia. I am not sad. I am relieved. My mom feels the same way, which makes us think we are horrible people. I have already started preparing my kids. My oldest is autistic, so while he has almost no connection to my dad(it’s complicated, but my dad never could connect with him and is a dick) he is trying to understand how to process the emotions. My youngest did connect with my dad, but understands it all. He’s 11 and I think he will be fine. I’m so sorry. I’ve had two good friends with parents with dementia and cancer and it’s such a mix of emotions. Don’t feel guilty for however you feel.
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Post by enchanted on Jul 30, 2022 18:53:15 GMT -6
Wtfshouldmynamebe I'll be keeping you in my thoughts. I can't imagine all the emotions right now.
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Post by enchanted on Jul 30, 2022 18:54:54 GMT -6
And you're not horrible. Neither is your mom. Dementia is hard on families and caregivers. You lose your person well before they physically pass.
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athn64
Ruby
Posts: 17,421 Likes: 76,763
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Post by athn64 on Jul 30, 2022 19:29:34 GMT -6
And you're not horrible. Neither is your mom. Dementia is hard on families and caregivers. Y ou lose your person well before they physically pass. This! My grandpa has dementia. We've been losing pieces of him for years. He's not the man I knew as a child.
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sifl
Platinum
Posts: 1,410 Likes: 5,598
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Post by sifl on Jul 30, 2022 19:44:10 GMT -6
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Post by goldenbird on Jul 30, 2022 19:47:05 GMT -6
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byjove
Ruby
Posts: 15,419 Likes: 75,491
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Post by byjove on Jul 31, 2022 4:56:39 GMT -6
Wtfshouldmynamebe sending more hugs ❤️❤️ there’s no wrong way to feel about all of that.
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Post by carmensandiego on Jul 31, 2022 11:31:41 GMT -6
Wtfshouldmynamebe - add me to the "not horrible" chorus. People are complicated and that's even before a dementia diagnosis. Around death we as a culture seem to add a lot of "should" baggage. But I don't think either of you are horrible.
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dc2london
Admin
Press Secretary
Posts: 61,763 Likes: 420,149
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Post by dc2london on Jul 31, 2022 12:44:56 GMT -6
Wtfshouldmynamebe you are not at all horrible. All of those feelings are valid and are ok. I'm sending you so much love.
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Post by Wtfshouldmynamebe on Jul 31, 2022 12:49:24 GMT -6
Thanks everyone. I appreciate the kind words
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clucky
Opal
Posts: 7,834 Likes: 32,884
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Post by clucky on Jul 31, 2022 13:42:37 GMT -6
Wtfshouldmynamebe not horrible, that is a lot to manage and the guilt of your honest feelings aren’t bad.
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sweetpea
Platinum
Posts: 1,816 Likes: 7,911
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Post by sweetpea on Jul 31, 2022 18:52:03 GMT -6
Does this mean you got a new job?? If so, congrats! I did! It seems too good to be true. After 19 years in Peds ER, I’m switching to elementary school nurse. I’ll stay casual at the hospital which is just a 16 hour/month commitment. That way if it doesn’t work out for some reason, I won’t lose all my hospital seniority. I’m very excited. I know the admin and staff because all my kids attended this school and I think it will be a great fit. My mom went from ER to eventually school nurse. She loved the kids. Some of the parents, petty admin stuff, and the sensation that she had head lice 24-7 not so much. It was cool seeing kids come up to her in stores and be so excited. Good luck with the new job!
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Post by mrsweasley on Jul 31, 2022 20:19:26 GMT -6
I hate dropping this in a random, but I prefer it on this board. I found out yesterday that my dad’s cancer is back. My dad also has severe dementia. I am not sad. I am relieved. My mom feels the same way, which makes us think we are horrible people. I have already started preparing my kids. My oldest is autistic, so while he has almost no connection to my dad(it’s complicated, but my dad never could connect with him and is a dick) he is trying to understand how to process the emotions. My youngest did connect with my dad, but understands it all. He’s 11 and I think he will be fine. You are not horrible. We can feel relief the end to the suffering may be soon and still be sad for the loss. When people have dementia or alzheimers the feeling of loss may hit much sooner than death. It takes a huge emotional toll to watch our loved ones become someone else. What you're feeling is normal and human 💗
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beaf12
Silver
Posts: 424 Likes: 2,056
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Post by beaf12 on Jul 31, 2022 21:54:15 GMT -6
I did! It seems too good to be true. After 19 years in Peds ER, I’m switching to elementary school nurse. I’ll stay casual at the hospital which is just a 16 hour/month commitment. That way if it doesn’t work out for some reason, I won’t lose all my hospital seniority. I’m very excited. I know the admin and staff because all my kids attended this school and I think it will be a great fit. My mom went from ER to eventually school nurse. She loved the kids. Some of the parents, petty admin stuff, and the sensation that she had head lice 24-7 not so much. It was cool seeing kids come up to her in stores and be so excited. Good luck with the new job! Thank you! I was a teacher way back when and when I became a nurse I always thought I’d find my way back into a school.
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Post by blurnette989 on Aug 1, 2022 2:53:15 GMT -6
Big fire yesterday only 10 miles from us. Thought it was a lot closer because of how thick the smoke is but the hills and valleys can be deceiving. Thankfully it wasn't closer. Our house is not in a high risk areas, but out lands are considered agroflorestral, so we could lose trees we've planted. Fingers crossed for no new fires around us.
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byjove
Ruby
Posts: 15,419 Likes: 75,491
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Post by byjove on Aug 1, 2022 5:35:28 GMT -6
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Post by cakewench on Aug 1, 2022 6:52:25 GMT -6
Sending you and your family all the love and hugs, Wtfshouldmynamebe - adding to everyone else's posts that you are absolutely not horrible. Everything you are feeling is normal. If there is anything we can do to help, please let us know <3 FX for you and your area, blurnette989!!! Stay safe!
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Post by GameNight on Aug 1, 2022 10:47:22 GMT -6
Thinking of you and your family/your children Wtfshouldmynamebe as you process this diagnosis. And I agree with what everyone has already said, you and your mom are not horrible people for feeling the way you do. blurnette989 I'm glad you're not in a high risk area, but I'm sure that was a scary experience yesterday. Hoping there are no new fires.
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sifl
Platinum
Posts: 1,410 Likes: 5,598
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Post by sifl on Aug 1, 2022 13:46:13 GMT -6
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