2017 haters guide to the WS catalog

[pobre]

It's out!



adequateman.deadspin.com/the-2017-hater-s-guide-to-the-williams-sonoma-catalog-1821181135

[pobre]

Holy shit at the $3700 coffee maker!

"I don’t know what 90 percent of that sentence means but for $3,700 that fucker better extract more than just coffee. It better dispense, like, bitcoins. As long as mankind exists, he will continually strive to find new and innovative ways to make coffee more expensive than it ever needs to be. Just go to a fucking diner. Whatever the top brew strength is, it better turn me into Spider-Man."

[pobre]

"For the richest of the rich shall not be appeased until the whole world is their countertop, and you and I and the rest of the common folk are shoved aside and cast into dumpsters like so many discarded cakelets … all to make room for, like, a mystery wine box thing. And all of it will be a tax write-off for them because that is the world we live in now. I just hope I get a taste of that prime rib before I shuffle off it.

Merry Christmas!"


Dying.

[bunnyfungo]

Yasss. I’ve been waiting for this!

[ftwr]

"I’m here to tell you this catalog is THERAPY. It is an escape. It is the way we cope with things here. And really, isn’t that better than actually fixing anything wrong with the world? I say yes."

This is painfully accurate today.

[Deleted]

Dec 12, 2017 15:29:47 GMT -6 @shinyredsmartazz said:

This was really what I needed today. Dying.

same

[chickie]

The aerator has me cackling

[Jesslfar]

I'm not gonna lie, I want everything they listed except the wine sommelier.

[ponyhairs]

Dec 12, 2017 15:15:43 GMT -6 pobre said:

Holy shit at the $3700 coffee maker!

"I don’t know what 90 percent of that sentence means but for $3,700 that fucker better extract more than just coffee. It better dispense, like, bitcoins. As long as mankind exists, he will continually strive to find new and innovative ways to make coffee more expensive than it ever needs to be. Just go to a fucking diner. Whatever the top brew strength is, it better turn me into Spider-Man."

We have a Jura at my office.  It makes lattes, and espresso and cappuccinos and everyone loves it. 

[rubysue]

This is my favorite day of the year.

[pobre]

You could go to a fancy coffee shop TWICE A DAY every day for a year for that.

[goldenbird]

I'm dying 😂. This is the best. SMEG is killing me.

[sunnysideup]

Naming the snowman marshmallows “floaters” has me laughing so hard 😂⛄️

[Uncaripswife]

Dec 12, 2017 15:37:37 GMT -6 Jesslfar said:

I'm not gonna lie, I want everything they listed except the wine sommelier.

Even the SMEG?

[Deleted]

sunnysideup that made laugh too. Like seriously I can’t imagine telling someone I wanted marshmallow floaters in my hot chocolate.

[Jesslfar]

Dec 12, 2017 17:59:07 GMT -6 Uncaripswife said:

Dec 12, 2017 15:37:37 GMT -6 Jesslfar said:

I'm not gonna lie, I want everything they listed except the wine sommelier.

Even the SMEG?

Yes. I didn't hate it.

[Uncaripswife]

Dec 12, 2017 18:39:48 GMT -6 Jesslfar said:

Dec 12, 2017 17:59:07 GMT -6 Uncaripswife said:

Even the SMEG?

Yes. I didn't hate it.

I couldn't see past the name. 🤣

[Yogurt]

The floaters had me dying. So, so funny.

[Bluebird]

Dec 12, 2017 17:53:32 GMT -6 sunnysideup said:

Naming the snowman marshmallows “floaters” has me laughing so hard 😂⛄️

I'm currently trying to disguise my laughing as coughing in my office.

[Deleted]

“Nothing says tasty like SMEG! We can make hot cocoa in our SMEG machine and then drop a floater in it!” 😂

[chickenonsunday]

Is there a way to look up these lists from years past? I worked at W.S. as a side gig for almost three years and I know didn't make any extra cash because I bought all things with my 40% discount. Reading the 2017 list has me missing my excessive shopping habits.

[piratecat]

There is a client who sends a box of peppermint bark - she must send a crap ton to a crap ton of people each year. This year, apparently WS is screwing up a lot of her deliveries, with package slips indicating random senders and recipients. We got ours yesterday, with the correct names, but then we got another one today, again with the correct names. One is the original, and the other with the fancy salt flakes.

[Deleted]

Dec 14, 2017 12:57:52 GMT -6 piratecat said:

There is a client who sends a box of peppermint bark - she must send a crap ton to a crap ton of people each year. This year, apparently WS is screwing up a lot of her deliveries, with package slips indicating random senders and recipients. We got ours yesterday, with the correct names, but then we got another one today, again with the correct names. One is the original, and the other with the fancy salt flakes.

How are the salty ones? I can't imagine salted peppermint tasting good.

[chickenonsunday]

Dec 14, 2017 12:57:52 GMT -6 piratecat said:

There is a client who sends a box of peppermint bark - she must send a crap ton to a crap ton of people each year. This year, apparently WS is screwing up a lot of her deliveries, with package slips indicating random senders and recipients. We got ours yesterday, with the correct names, but then we got another one today, again with the correct names. One is the original, and the other with the fancy salt flakes.

Real question - are you sharing with the office or stashing it for yourself?

[piratecat]

@rocknroll, someone opened the original box first so I'm trying to wait a reasonable amount of time before opening the other but I'll keep you posted.

chickenonsunday, she sends it to me and my boss and we always share with the rest of the office. There's a box of dark almond brittle someone else gets every year so it's a good trade.

[sterling]

Dec 12, 2017 16:21:13 GMT -6 pobre said:

You could go to a fancy coffee shop TWICE A DAY every day for a year for that.

You better be selling the coffee out of your bootstrap start up cafe for that price.

[lovescheese]

Dec 12, 2017 19:52:47 GMT -6 @snow said:

OMG I just got to Smeg. And all I can think of is the old BBC show Red Dwarf.

Same! Loved Red Dwarf growing up.