Team Blue Moms - The big C question

[mkrupar]

Let's talk circumcision. H and I have talked a little about the pros and cons to both choices, but haven't come to a solid decision.

So tell me what your thoughts are.

Have you decided?

What was the driving factor in your decision?

If you're a STM+ of boys weigh in as well. Tell us your decision and what helped you decide.

[rebeccabunch]

Good question!

For this, I let H Decide. Both our boys are circumcised. With DS1 I was so out of it from my middle of the night C I barely knew it was happening. With DS2 it was a little harder for me but I don't regret our decision.

[thecatsmeow]

DS is and if this one is a boy he will be too. I read about the pros and cons, but ultimately DH is circumcised so we had DS also. He healed quickly and we had no problems with aftercare so that made it an easier decision this time around.

[mkrupar]

Aug 12, 2017 8:04:34 GMT -6 rebeccabunch said:

Good question!

For this, I let H Decide. Both our boys are circumcised. With DS1 I was so out of it from my middle of the night C I barely knew it was happening. With DS2 it was a little harder for me but I don't regret our decision.

I wish H would just make the decision, but he hates making those decisions, or at least saying what he really wants for fear I won't agree. Dude just tell me what you want.

I'm leaning towards doing it. I had an interesting convo with my dad and he let my mom decide when it came to my brother, but he said he would have probably not done it. I know there's a trend towards less people doing it. And it's really not common outside of the US. H is circumcised, so to me it makes sense to do it.

See, can't decide. Lol

[CoachTsWife]

Aug 12, 2017 8:49:25 GMT -6 thecatsmeow said:

DS is and if this one is a boy he will be too. I read about the pros and cons, but ultimately DH is circumcised so we had DS also. He healed quickly and we had no problems with aftercare so that made it an easier decision this time around.

^^^ This is exactly what I would've said. We know this one is also a boy and so he'll be circumcised as well.

[arimaythea]

There definitely seems to be a trend away from circumcision. I know a few people who are very anti-circumcision.

As for us, we decided to circumcise DS and will again with #2. I let DH make the call.

I will say though that the night in the hospital that DS got circumcised was really stressful because they had him away from me for much longer than I expected and he cried so much after they brought him back to me. But he healed fine from it and we haven't had further complications.

[burritosateverymeal]

We had DS1 circumcised and will have DS2 circumcised as well.

Ultimately, I let DH make the choice. He was team no circumcision until we were actually in the hospital. He is circumcised and I think all the info on the internet scared him (don't Google smegma!). He said he never had any issues with being circumcised, so he didn't see what the big deal is. I have absolutely no opinion one way or another, so I'm useless ikn this debate.

[versed]

We will circumcise this one just like the first two boys. I attended DS2's procedure and he hardly made a peep (Dr thought it was a little odd I wanted to be there, but I didn't want him alone).

I know this discussion can get very heated, as most parenting pages I belong to contain a very strong anti-circ population.

I'm all for everyone doing their research and going with what they feel is right for their family.

[thechickencoop]

Yea, we circ'd DS1, will circ DS2. Pretty much because I don't see why not (I know anti circ say the same for their stance).

H is, he wants our boys to be ::shrug::

DS1 had no issues with it; aftercare was breezy. Hopefully this one is the same.

[blackmamba]

I was uncertain with DS and ultimately let my H decide. DS was circumcised and if this baby is a boy he will be as well.

[cougarette]

Aug 12, 2017 11:25:24 GMT -6 CoachTsWife said:

Aug 12, 2017 8:49:25 GMT -6 thecatsmeow said:

DS is and if this one is a boy he will be too. I read about the pros and cons, but ultimately DH is circumcised so we had DS also. He healed quickly and we had no problems with aftercare so that made it an easier decision this time around.

^^^ This is exactly what I would've said. We know this one is also a boy and so he'll be circumcised as well.

+3

DH actually said he's glad he already knows how to care for it while it heals this time around, so he feels more confident in the decision.

[racegurl87]

We'll be getting sequel circumcised. I let H make the decision and I got tips from my cousin who has 2 boys about caring for him while it's healing.

[Taitai]

Ooooh - this is a fascinating topic for me...primarily because in the country I live in, the local population and most foreigners do not circumcise. It's pretty much an American expat, Jewish, or Muslim thing. DS is circumcised, because DH is and while researching we saw the American Academy of Pediatrics actually changed their guidelines to encourage it (I think before 2013 or 2014, they were neutral on it). DS2 will also be getting circumcised.

Our pediatrician here (who is amazing and we love) used to be super super super anti-circ...to the point that he wouldn't accept patients who had been circumcised. He is one of the best pediatricians in the country and his English is flawless. Fortunately for us - he decided to start accepting circumcised patients once the AAP endorsed its use from a health/medical standpoint.

I'm personally not very opinionated either way - I let DH make the decision and the AAP endorsement also made me more comfortable/confident with our decision to circumcise.

[duskymonkey]

I was about to say what Taitai said above. Outside of the US, it's very much a religious consideration. Ultimately I also left the decision to hubs cos well he's the one with the equipment too and know better. He did say it would be good to do it due to cleanliness and I would have to agree. Also NBD on the aftercare and healing on our end. I think just no baths until pedi gives you a go ahead which was almost a month for us anyways due to DS' stubborn umbilical cord so he only got sponge baths the first month and by that time, C was already healing nicely.

[duskymonkey]

Aug 12, 2017 12:01:47 GMT -6 arimaythea said:

There definitely seems to be a trend away from circumcision. I know a few people who are very anti-circumcision.

As for us, we decided to circumcise DS and will again with #2. I let DH make the call.

I will say though that the night in the hospital that DS got circumcised was really stressful because they had him away from me for much longer than I expected and he cried so much after they brought him back to me. But he healed fine from it and we haven't had further complications.

We also went with DS, other than just a couple of hours of asking the nurse to take him for the night so hubs and I could rest, he was never out of our sight! I was a paranoid FTM! Out pedi also gave us the tools he used ( they do not sterilize and reuse it and apparently gets discarded ) and hubs said he can use that later to threaten DS when he's much older and misbehaves  ??? . So now hubs uses it in his workshop  . That would've been a FFFC I suppose.SaveSave

[mommabakes]

DS is and this boy will be also. I left it to my husband to make the decision. DS healed really quickly and it never seemed to bother him. Plus it seemed like it'd be easier to keep properly clean.

[mommabakes]

Also, I have a cousin that was not circ'd as a baby but for the some kind of med issue needed to be at around 10yrs old. I'd rather have it done when they can't remember it.

[trinitrotoluene]

Aug 13, 2017 16:29:33 GMT -6 mommabakes said:

Also, I have a cousin that was not circ'd as a baby but for the some kind of med issue needed to be at around 10yrs old. I'd rather have it done when they can't remember it.

This. I know he still won't remember it, but my nephew was circ'd at 2 for a medical issue, and was miserable for a lot longer than DS who just came back to my room and slept for hours then moved on with his little life of boobs and sleep and boobs.

[cythe]

Aug 13, 2017 16:29:33 GMT -6 mommabakes said:

Also, I have a cousin that was not circ'd as a baby but for the some kind of med issue needed to be at around 10yrs old. I'd rather have it done when they can't remember it.

I don't have a penis, but this sounds absolutely awful.

[rachydc]

It wasn't really a decision for us. I looked at my husband, said "We're doing it right?" and he nodded emphatically. I'll admit and dont care, that vanity is a driving factor.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[thatgirlrachel]

Aug 12, 2017 18:42:22 GMT -6 thechickencoop said:

snip

H is, he wants our boys to be ::shrug::

snip

This is exactly where we're at. This is our first boy, but he will be getting the cut.

[caitost21]

STM and if this baby is a boy, he too will be circumcised.

Our main driving factor is religion/cultural. MH is Jewish so it really wasn't something he would bend on and I'm fine with it.

The procedure was quick and DS healed well/quickly and we had no problems with aftercare. We will be at the same hospital and same doctors too so that helps with some of worry.

[riverraine]

With DS I let H make the decision and he wanted to do it since he is. If it were solely up to me I probably would not have, but I didn't feel strongly enough to override H's preference.

[chitownsully]

Wow. I'm pretty shocked that I am the ONLY one leaning the non-circ route. Taitai, do you have links from AAP on when and why they changed their recommendations?

My reasoning is opposite of most of you. "Why not?" vs. "Why?" I don't really see the medical or sanitary reason to do it given the research I've already done.

[doodlemommy]

We are team green but leaning towards doing it if this is a boy. DH is circ'd and for religious reasons would like son(s) to be as well.

[Taitai]

Aug 14, 2017 11:45:20 GMT -6 chitownsully said:

Wow. I'm pretty shocked that I am the ONLY one leaning the non-circ route. Taitai, do you have links from AAP on when and why they changed their recommendations?

My reasoning is opposite of most of you. "Why not?" vs. "Why?" I don't really see the medical or sanitary reason to do it given the research I've already done.

Sure! Here's the link to the AAP press statement. Basically, the AAP says the health benefits outweighs the risks. However - the AAP still leaves it up to parents on whether to go through with it. As such, they don't universally recommend circumcision as a matter or course. There's not such a huge medical benefit, that the AAP is like - yes - this should be standard practice for all male infants (unlike vitamin K shots or bilirubin blood tests or vaccines).

Honestly I could go either way - I don't have very strong feelings on the issue.

Hope this helps!

www.aap.org/en-us/about-the-aap/aap-press-room/Pages/New-Benefits-Point-to-Greater-Benefits-of-Infant-Circumcision-But-Final-Say-is-Still-Up-to-parents-Says-AAP.aspx

[britt]

Yes we will be if it is a boy. I let DH make the choice but now I'm wondering if I should do some research and see the opposite end of why people wouldn't, I really didn't give much thought to it

[chitownsully]

Aug 14, 2017 21:39:28 GMT -6 Taitai said:

Aug 14, 2017 11:45:20 GMT -6 chitownsully said:

Wow. I'm pretty shocked that I am the ONLY one leaning the non-circ route. Taitai , do you have links from AAP on when and why they changed their recommendations?

My reasoning is opposite of most of you. "Why not?" vs. "Why?" I don't really see the medical or sanitary reason to do it given the research I've already done.

Sure! Here's the link to the AAP press statement. Basically, the AAP says the health benefits outweighs the risks. However - the AAP still leaves it up to parents on whether to go through with it. As such, they don't universally recommend circumcision as a matter or course. There's not such a huge medical benefit, that the AAP is like - yes - this should be standard practice for all male infants (unlike vitamin K shots or bilirubin blood tests or vaccines).

Honestly I could go either way - I don't have very strong feelings on the issue.

Hope this helps!

www.aap.org/en-us/about-the-aap/aap-press-room/Pages/New-Benefits-Point-to-Greater-Benefits-of-Infant-Circumcision-But-Final-Say-is-Still-Up-to-parents-Says-AAP.aspx

Thank you! Yes, I've read this. I've also read a bit into the details around the research they did and some of the assumptions they made. The "benefits" are so nominal yet so are the "risks" that the statement doesn't actually tell you much. I also think that, if you read into it, they are creating a way for circumcision to be covered by insurance by recommending it - which is great! I'm very much in the camp "to each their own" but definitely do additional research to understand both sides.

To circ or not to circ? I don't think there is a right answer. The answer best lies with families which is what the AAP ultimately recommended.

[littleowl913]

With DS, I told DH he should make the decision. Before I said anything DH said eh everyone does it, so might as well. Of course I didn't like his reasoning for his answer (not the answer itself) and told him but do you want to take into consideration that you're not circ? I left it alone and ultimately he came back and said don't circ and he can be just like daddy and he'll teach DS how to clean etc. So this one will also not be circ.

[lahmajunwithlemon]

Aug 14, 2017 11:45:20 GMT -6 chitownsully said:

Wow. I'm pretty shocked that I am the ONLY one leaning the non-circ route. Taitai, do you have links from AAP on when and why they changed their recommendations?

My reasoning is opposite of most of you. "Why not?" vs. "Why?" I don't really see the medical or sanitary reason to do it given the research I've already done.

Sorry for pulling up a two week old thread, I'm trying to catch up on all that I missed and feel like I can contribute to this one! Because chitownsully you are not alone lol We will be leaving our boy intact. H is intact and so is our 20 month old. We have had no troubles and don't regret our decision at all. Not something I'm super passionate or judgement about as all our friends whom have boys chose to circ (the majority are also religious) but I just a) didn't see a need for an unnecessary medical intervention, and b) our boys will match H so it made the decision even easier. There are lots of great info out there and support groups for parents who chose to keep their son(s) intact. glad you've done some research already, let me know if you have any questions!