Check in and randoms - week March 30

[sdlaura]

At my hospital they have a new no visitor policy, but it does't apply to the labor partner of maternity patients. The person can't come and go - they have to stay there, or they can't come back in.

I only plan to stay in the hospital 24 hours after the birth, and even shorter if they'll let me leave before that. And we have had DH go home to our other kids at night after I've given birth the past two times anyway. So the only thing that would change is that DH can't go out to get me some kind of good food after delivery - which I don't think we'd do in this environment anyway.

We plan to bring our own food, just to reduce the amount of people coming and going from our room. We'll see if I even let anyone touch me or the baby while we're there  I anticipate being a crazy person. I think I'll bring my own bleach wipes and wipe down everything in the room, bring my own towel, and DH and I will wear masks.  I really really don't want to deal with coronavirus right after birth or with a newborn, or risk bringing it home to my other kids or my parents.

[hangry]

Apr 3, 2020 12:15:12 GMT -6 danib said:

Apr 3, 2020 11:21:42 GMT -6 aries said:

Omg no! That is the worst, I feel so bad for you. Does that also mean no dad as the support person, meaning now no support person when you deliver? I really hope by the time you deliver that this has been overturned. I’m so sorry and crossing my fingers for you that this is reversed.

apparently once you are admitted he can come in for delivery (has to wait outside until they determine if they will send you home, monitor for a bit, or admit) then can come inside for just that part then has to elave again. Which is absolutely rediculous in my opinion.
Edit: better than nothing. But stupid still.

This is the same as my hospital. If you aren’t in active labour, they will tell dad to take a hike. I don’t know how they define active labor though. I didn’t get a post partum update though. I’ve stayed only 36-48 hours and I expect shorter in these times. I’m only worried if he can’t stay because my hospital is baby friendly, which means no nursery. So id be on my own that night. Not the end of the world if everything goes smoothly.

[trtlcrzy]

We let spouses go up to triage for L&D. Patients are only allowed 1 person for the entirety of their stay for L&D/postpartum. The visitor can leave and come back but they can’t switch people in and out. Our rooms are all private, both L&D and postpartum, they’re actually on separate floors too. They have a little bistro in PP that I assume is closed at the moment, though I haven’t heard. If baby ends up in the NICU only one person is allowed in the baby’s room unless baby’s not doing well, then both parents can be in there. The parents can switch in and out as long as it’s only 1 in the building at a time. Oh and the high risk rooms aren’t allowed to have a visitor unless they will be delivering, so if you get out on bed rest or whatever, you’re on your own.

[trtlcrzy]

I have a tmi question. I don’t remember this from my previous pregnancies but maybe it’s just selective memory. My vulva is puffy or swollen or something. Is anyone else experiencing this? I only remember it being like this postpartum in the past.

[danib]

Apr 3, 2020 20:16:04 GMT -6 hangry said:

Apr 3, 2020 12:15:12 GMT -6 danib said:

apparently once you are admitted he can come in for delivery (has to wait outside until they determine if they will send you home, monitor for a bit, or admit) then can come inside for just that part then has to elave again. Which is absolutely rediculous in my opinion.
Edit: better than nothing. But stupid still.

This is the same as my hospital. If you aren’t in active labour, they will tell dad to take a hike. I don’t know how they define active labor though. I didn’t get a post partum update though. I’ve stayed only 36-48 hours and I expect shorter in these times. I’m only worried if he can’t stay because my hospital is baby friendly, which means no nursery. So id be on my own that night. Not the end of the world if everything goes smoothly.

ours is baby friendly too (no nursery either). I had a 3 day stay after DS1 was born and 6 days after DS2. This is really the biggest cause for my anxiety. If we can get out within 24 hours I'll manage, but multiple days and I will go insane.

[danib]

Apr 3, 2020 20:54:28 GMT -6 trtlcrzy said:

I have a tmi question. I don’t remember this from my previous pregnancies but maybe it’s just selective memory. My vulva is puffy or swollen or something. Is anyone else experiencing this? I only remember it being like this postpartum in the past.

I can't see mine lol, but it's definitely tender/sensitive down there.

[hangry]

trtlcrzy I think with increased blood volume and flow, this can be normal. I don’t remember if you’re working but if you’re on your feet for a lot of the Day I would imagine that would increase swelling down there. Just a guess.

[sdlaura]

danib, have you had c-sections, or is there another reason you’ve had to stay in the hospital so long with your first two kids?

[danib]

Apr 4, 2020 8:54:54 GMT -6 sdlaura said:

danib, have you had c-sections, or is there another reason you’ve had to stay in the hospital so long with your first two kids?

no sections. With DS1 he was jaundice and we had trouble getting him to feed. He wouldn't stay awake long enough, and we couldn't leave until he was feeding properly. I don't think I needed the full 3 days with him but as a FTM I wasn't super confident in advocating for us.
With DS2 he stopped breathing a few times so there was that. Then he had low sugars, and later ended up jaundice as well. Because he was born at 37 weeks they had to follow premie protocol with him (if there had been no issues they would have gone by full term, apparently 37 is a grey area). He ended up needing a few days in an incubator with the UV light, and then we needed another 24 hours out of the lights to make sure his levels didn't spike again. I technically could have been discharged much earlier, but then he would have been in the NICU instead and I would have had to come back and forth as a visitor rather than having a room and a bed and meals etc.

[sdlaura]

In those situations danib it seems like they’re not all that likely to recur and you should be able to get out of there faster. I was annoyed at having to stay two nights with DD because of jaundice, so we decided if our other kids had jaundice we would insist that they send us home with a solar blanket thing for home. DS1 has major heart defects and even then we left after two nights and went back the next day so they could check him. They wanted to transfer him to the children’s hospital, but when we questioned why (because that would have meant separating him from me) they didn’t have a good reason. They were going to monitor him the same way there that they were with us, it was just a ‘jurisdictional issue.’ So we pushed back and he was allowed to stay with us and the cardiologist (who we still see today, 6 years later) just walked next door to us to check him.

]With DS2 we left after 1 night. I’ve found that we just have to insist immediately after giving birth that we’re leaving ASAP. With DS2 someone called the next day, annoyed that we hadn’t waited long enough to fill out some form. Which obviously was fine to do over the phone, because that’s what we did. We also live about a mile from the pediatrician so we can go there twice a day if they want checks for something after we leave. Anyway, in my experience I’ve found that you just have to be politely insistent and you can get out of there faster.

[danib]

sdlaura I'll definitely be more insistent this time around if anything comes up that we can deal with at home. I'm also only 5 minutes from the hospital so have no problem going back for checks if that's what it takes.

[willow]

It really is a crazy time to be anticipating birth. I’m grateful at this point that they will allow H to stay the whole time even if it means we have to plan ahead a bit more with food stuff. My mom is going to make us a couple meals that we can heat in the microwave in our hospital room.

Every time I see it mentioned here that people just have curtained off sections of rooms, I’m amazed. I don’t think I could do it. I mean, if you have no choice, obviously, but it would make me HIGHLY motivated to GTFO as soon as they would let me.

[sdlaura]

willow I agree! All private rooms at our hospital. And I still try to leave ASAP.

[Radley]

Both of the boys were born at a freestanding birth center, we had private rooms but I was so glad their policy was to send home 5-8 hrs after birth. I always get antsy not being home. With my ectopic I was admitted on a Monday and went home on Wednesday and it was awful. I’m sure I’ll be antsy again this time. I’m so sorry for anyone who doesn’t have a private room.

[aries]

We have all private rooms too and they are set up that the room you start in is where you labour, deliver and stay post partum. But I also had to stay a few nights after DS because my white blood cell count spiked so they wanted to monitor it. I dont know if it was really necessary that I stayed and I’m sure if that happened this time around they’d still kick me out. My friend just had her baby and she said they kick you out 24 hrs or earlier so with everything going on I’ll be happy to go back to my bubble!

danib I really hope you get to leave earlier than 3 or 6 days and willow I hope all goes smoothly with delivery of the twins so you are able to leave early too.
Edit - sorry I just went back and read and see your having a c/s (which is coming up so soon, that’s exciting!) do you think they will make you stay longer or did they say when you will be able to leave?

trtlcrzy I haven’t found that yet but I don’t have a very physical job (not at all) so makes sense if you have a more demanding job causing more blood flow to the area. Does it feel better if you sit on an ice pack?

[trtlcrzy]

danib hangry aries it’s not painful at all, I just noticed it after going to the bathroom and wiping. I don’t stand a lot during the day so it’s def not that. I’m chalking it up to getting older and being my 3rd kid.