king26
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Post by king26 on Oct 31, 2019 19:09:42 GMT -6
Like WTF is with people? I never understood why nosey people think it’s ok to say what YOU should do regarding your family and situation. They don’t know your life and it can be a really insensitive thing to say. Sorry you are dealing with it 😡 SERIOUSLY!! Like she was like he HAS to have a sibling. He’ll be so lonely! Unless you try and can’t, there’s no reason to not have more. I was like 😮 Wtf. I am very quiet in person about my infertility but if someone said that to me Id probably bust out with the fact that it took 7 surgeries and 1000 shots to have J so...newp.
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king26
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Post by king26 on Oct 31, 2019 19:11:59 GMT -6
I don't get people making comments like that. It's so rude and absolutely none of their business. We found out in toddler H's speech therapy that he's not moving his lips sufficiently to form sounds. He mostly keeps his lips in a flat profile while speaking. It's kind of a breakthrough to know that. However she said that the pacifier might be a main cause. I feel so bad!!! I would have taken it away months ago if I had known. I'm definitely going to be more careful with baby girl and not let her use it as much. Anyone else's 2 year old refusing the Halloween costume? We've tried Batman, the flash, catboy, and Chase, all resulting in him screaming and ripping at the jumpsuit. So done with it! Dont feel bad. Ive seen kids talk around their binkies. Its actually better if he didnt because if he was talking around it he would have incorrect mouth formations which is harder to correct. Also, nit trying to sound like an expert as J still only says 10 to 15 words but all that is what my speech therapist friend at work says lol
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Post by yellowcat on Oct 31, 2019 20:23:16 GMT -6
My 3 yearold is still awake like right now. I left my house at 645 this morning and didn't get home until 830. I am tired I want to sleep. Wtf
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king26
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Post by king26 on Nov 1, 2019 5:06:39 GMT -6
My 3 yearold is still awake like right now. I left my house at 645 this morning and didn't get home until 830. I am tired I want to sleep. Wtf Ugh im sorry. I hope you got some sleep
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king26
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Post by king26 on Nov 1, 2019 5:07:18 GMT -6
Also, dont forget to put your Halloween pics in the private forum!!
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Post by yellowcat on Nov 1, 2019 9:44:09 GMT -6
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jt2378
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Post by jt2378 on Nov 1, 2019 10:56:39 GMT -6
I need an update on the sleep consultant! addymac, I hope it went well 😊
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addymac
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Post by addymac on Nov 1, 2019 11:41:32 GMT -6
I need an update on the sleep consultant! addymac , I hope it went well 😊 Hi! Sorry - I was busy on wednesday at work after the appt and then yesterday N kept me very busy with not wanting to nap at home but only in the car ::eyeroll:: So we saw a pediatric sleep specialist doctor. Basically she is a way cheaper sleep consultant because she is covered by insurance LOL. But she ruled out medical issues like sleep apnea (of course last night I was like OMG IS THAT SNORING MAYBE HE DOES HAVE SLEEP APNEA) and gave us a very specific sleep plan to follow. He has pediatric insomnia- sleep onset association type. Basically I suck as a mom (my words, not hers) because I never taught him how to sleep correctly and independently and how to self-soothe. But also he has certain risk factors that made him have a higher risk of insomnia and that plus his separation anxiety over the summer put him over the edge when I went back to work after my surgery and it "was the straw that broke the camel's back" and destroyed any amount of abilities he had. His risks include his reflux (because from an early age he learned to dislike laying down to sleep), his dad was a shit sleeper as a baby/kid, so my MIL tells me (so genetics/predisposition), and something else that my tired brain doesn't remember - maybe the separation anxiety? IDFK. ANYWAY. long story short, we need to consolidate naptime from 1-3, wake up no later than 3pm. Bedtime is now 7-8. Routine is going to be: Bath, while bath is happening we have to play the same calming song on repeat so he will learn to associate it with relaxation time and then bedtime, then diaper/pjs/teeth brushing, then ONE book - same book every night, and then lights out by 8pm. And then she gave us 2 options for sleep training - gradual extinction or CIO fullon hardcore. She said we could decide. So, DH and I have not been able to talk since we've barely seen each other and also he refused to try to get out of work to come to the appointment and he keeps forgetting to look at the papers that detail all of this I'm not sure which one we will do and if we will start now or when he gets back from FL since they go in less than two weeks. I'm glad I didn't pay for a private sleep consultant but also I wish there was a better fix. But she says she sincerely thinks he can be fixed. I'm probably going to need a new refill on my xanax by the time we finish this training.
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addymac
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Post by addymac on Nov 1, 2019 11:43:57 GMT -6
My 3 yearold is still awake like right now. I left my house at 645 this morning and didn't get home until 830. I am tired I want to sleep. Wtf OMG. I'm sorry. I understand. On Wednesday I was up with N bright and early, with him until he went down for a nap at 1:30 and I snuck out of his room and left for work, then worked 3-11. When I left work all I wanted to do was get home and eat becuase I was so hungry again and then just go to bed. And who was screaming already when I walked in the door at 11:45PM? I tried to hide from him but he saw me behind the kitchen counter LOL and "found me" and then he stopped crying and was SO HAPPY I had to just crawl into bed and go to sleep. He will only sleep if we are holding hands or he is gripping my arm. Holy fuck.
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jt2378
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Post by jt2378 on Nov 1, 2019 13:28:27 GMT -6
I’m sorry addymac, I’m sure it’s overwhelming and a lot to hear. Please don’t say you are a bad mom, you are so far from it! I’m glad she gave you a plan with somewhere to start. I hope it works or at least improves greatly so you guys can get more rest. Do you have a follow up scheduled? M has been doing much better at night but I’ve pretty much given up napping her which I’m unsure is the right thing. She still feels so young to me but I will do anything right now for better nighttime sleep.
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addymac
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Post by addymac on Nov 1, 2019 15:19:10 GMT -6
I’m sorry addymac , I’m sure it’s overwhelming and a lot to hear. Please don’t say you are a bad mom, you are so far from it! I’m glad she gave you a plan with somewhere to start. I hope it works or at least improves greatly so you guys can get more rest. Do you have a follow up scheduled? M has been doing much better at night but I’ve pretty much given up napping her which I’m unsure is the right thing. She still feels so young to me but I will do anything right now for better nighttime sleep. So someone somewhere mentioned sleep consolidation method to me and that's basically what you are doing - getting rid of the naptime to get a better night's sleep. I was really hoping it wouldn't be a thing for my dr, because the idea of no naptime terrifies me, but hopefully you can sleep better at night and make her have "quiet time" in her crib with books and toys so you can get some shit done or a nap yourself during "nap" time? Lately he's been sleeping okay - waking up before midnight the last 3 nights like clockwork, and then he falls asleep with me either on the futon or our bed and then sleeps a good stretch. But he's waking up too early - when we are leaving for work and it has made leaving for work really, really hard b/c he's scream crying trying to cling to me..
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Post by thinkchocolate05 on Nov 2, 2019 2:06:32 GMT -6
addymac you are not a bad mom. Some kids are just so hard with sleep. I didn't train my five year old properly either for sleep and it's just now starting to get better. I'm glad you have a path to better sleep now even though it sounds hard. I hope he picks it up quickly and it gets better soon. king26 I think what you said is actually the problem--any words he says he learned talking around the binky so his mouth is staying in an open/flat profile versus moving properly. So he will need to relearn how to move his mouth. Ugh! I wish I had taken the binky away sooner. It helped with his sleep and I was so traumatized by his brothers horrible sleep that I let it slide.
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king26
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Post by king26 on Nov 2, 2019 2:21:45 GMT -6
addymac i hope this works for you! I think as a forst time mom its hard. We held j for naps until he was like 6 mo ths, gave him bottle motn until 15 mi ths, and rocked him to sleep for a while so i know that all led to his crappy sleeping. I know gradual extinction and CIO will suck bht once he is sleeping better you will be so happy. Im sure you know but we have had to do Ferber method 4 times with J and it sucks every time ( until he starts sleeping well again). I hope this is the fix you need!
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king26
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Post by king26 on Nov 2, 2019 2:23:24 GMT -6
My 3 yearold is still awake like right now. I left my house at 645 this morning and didn't get home until 830. I am tired I want to sleep. Wtf OMG. I'm sorry. I understand. On Wednesday I was up with N bright and early, with him until he went down for a nap at 1:30 and I snuck out of his room and left for work, then worked 3-11. When I left work all I wanted to do was get home and eat becuase I was so hungry again and then just go to bed. And who was screaming already when I walked in the door at 11:45PM? I tried to hide from him but he saw me behind the kitchen counter LOL and "found me" and then he stopped crying and was SO HAPPY I had to just crawl into bed and go to sleep. He will only sleep if we are holding hands or he is gripping my arm. Holy fuck. Oh lord. We dis the hand holding for 2 weeks when we took Js binky. That was the last time we have had ti do hard core sleep training ( in June) and it was hard because all he wanted was to hold our hand whike he slept so I totally get this one!
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king26
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Post by king26 on Nov 2, 2019 2:27:48 GMT -6
So Thursday night sleep was shit. J was up feom 1230 to 130 crying. I kep going in and doing check ins but dh had taken a pill for his back and was sound asleep while i kept going in for j. Then once he slept i couldnt fall asleep until 230.
He had so much fun trick or treating. We onky did our street but he laughed, pointed at the kids, waved to everyone, and had a good time. Once home he helped pass out candy which he loved even more. At 730 he was running laps around the house and finally crashed at 815.
Speech is not improving so i called another place for an eval because unlike the school system he doesnt need a 25% delay, just a delay. Since he had a 21% delay i think we will get services. However, first appointment to be tested isnt until dec. 9 which sucks.
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king26
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Post by king26 on Nov 2, 2019 9:53:10 GMT -6
thinkchocolate05, please don’t blame yourself! Plenty of kids use their pacifiers through toddlerhood and it doesn’t happen. So, you’d have no idea it could affect them like that. I wouldn’t! I’ve only heard on teeth issues. I hope the therapy is very successful. Agreed. There are still like 4 kids in Js daycare using binkys and they have to be 2 to go. J used one until 21 months. What are you going to do? These days I swear anything you do affects something lol
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jt2378
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Post by jt2378 on Nov 2, 2019 10:45:38 GMT -6
Yeah honestly I don’t really even bat an eye at a 2 yo with a paci. Please don’t blame yourself thinkchocolate05.
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addymac
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Post by addymac on Nov 2, 2019 12:08:20 GMT -6
Agreed thinkchocolate05. Heck N used his for naps and bedtime til he was 25mo and only stopped bc we got HFM and it hurt him to suck on it notherwise he probably would still have one. He’ll figure it out.
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Post by thinkchocolate05 on Nov 2, 2019 22:21:44 GMT -6
Thanks guys. That makes me feel better about the paci, although I think we've seen an improvement in the past few days when we've gone hardcore on taking it away. king26 I'm glad there is another avenue for J to get speech services. That sucks you have to wait so long. What is it through if not the local school system? It seems like he will definitely qualify. @starzia So you have both kids in the same room? How is that generally working out? Is one in a bed and one in a crib? We are going to transfer toddler H into ds1 room once we decide to ignore the American academy of pediatrics advice to room share for a year and move baby J into our nursery (we lasted till 4 months room sharing with toddler H). I am so scared of putting the boys in the same room bc ds1 has always been a crappy sleeper and DS2 a pretty good sleeper and I'm afraid they will both become crappy sleepers. We had a few days where all three kids were waking up in turns all night and we were seriously losing our shit. Dh starts acting like a five year old (his words) if he gets woken multiple times by multiple kids in one night.
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bsouls
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Post by bsouls on Nov 3, 2019 13:31:10 GMT -6
R still uses a paci for naps and bedtime, but we don’t let her bring it outside of the crib. There are a couple of two year olds that use the paci all the time at daycare.
R is into stickers, suckers and cars. Pretty sure we are going to get heavily involved in Hot Wheels. So, far we only have about 8 - but, it’s only been two weeks. She no longer cares about TV or the iPad. And, she counts to 10 by rote memory.
I finally spent my LUSH gift card from Christmas yesterday and am now taking a bath. The kids have already come into the bathroom twice each in five minutes.
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addymac
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Post by addymac on Nov 3, 2019 14:26:44 GMT -6
bsouls is locking the door an option?? A bath sounds heavenly. We did have date night last night and it was such a good time- dinner was delicious, the drinks were on point, and then we went to an arcade bar and I finally tried a White Claw and we played fun games. Then picked up some dessert and home to snuggle and not have to deal with bedtime! It was also just really nice for us to spend some alone time and connect after a tough few weeks of N being constantly sick or clingy and shit sleep.
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king26
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Post by king26 on Nov 4, 2019 12:04:53 GMT -6
Thanks guys. That makes me feel better about the paci, although I think we've seen an improvement in the past few days when we've gone hardcore on taking it away. king26 I'm glad there is another avenue for J to get speech services. That sucks you have to wait so long. What is it through if not the local school system? It seems like he will definitely qualify. @starzia So you have both kids in the same room? How is that generally working out? Is one in a bed and one in a crib? We are going to transfer toddler H into ds1 room once we decide to ignore the American academy of pediatrics advice to room share for a year and move baby J into our nursery (we lasted till 4 months room sharing with toddler H). I am so scared of putting the boys in the same room bc ds1 has always been a crappy sleeper and DS2 a pretty good sleeper and I'm afraid they will both become crappy sleepers. We had a few days where all three kids were waking up in turns all night and we were seriously losing our shit. Dh starts acting like a five year old (his words) if he gets woken multiple times by multiple kids in one night. Its The Childrens League. They do it free. Its usually for people without insurance or low income. I asked and they said its for everyone though mainly they get low income because its free. I feel like noone knows abkut the resources around here which stinks. I only know because im in the school system and have had other kids go there.
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