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Post by mrsweasley on Jan 9, 2018 21:08:56 GMT -6
I might have a little sympathy if Kevin took any personal responsibility. So far on the show, he has a pattern of acting like an asshole that doesn't take any responsibility for his actions I took his actions as screaming for attention/help and the only way he would get any is by acting out. At 36 it's a super immature response. I know acting out can be a natural response, but he also clearly has a lot of growing up to do
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dragonflyinn
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Post by dragonflyinn on Jan 9, 2018 21:11:35 GMT -6
I took his actions as screaming for attention/help and the only way he would get any is by acting out. At 36 it's a super immature response. I know acting out can be a natural response, but he also clearly has a lot of growing up to do Agreed— I think these conversations should have happened a long time ago. But I know plenty of adults who don’t know how to talk about the hard things and still act this way at that age.
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michyme
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Post by michyme on Jan 9, 2018 21:12:57 GMT -6
That cabin scene... Randall is right, everyone has their own version of their childhood. Kevin has a point about being the odd one out in a way, but Rebecca certainly loved him and meant well. This makes me so sad about how my boys already fight for attention, and how perceived slights could impact our relationships. Count on this show to get me so emotional. Yes— makes me think of all the ways I think I’m being loving or doing what would make my daughter feel cared about, but she may see it differently/it may not actually be what she needs or wants. yes! Exactly. This show really has me looking at myself as a parent and trying to see things through my kids eyes. But like you both did said, no matter what they might see it differently. So hard.
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allisong
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Post by allisong on Jan 9, 2018 21:15:38 GMT -6
I took his actions as screaming for attention/help and the only way he would get any is by acting out. At 36 it's a super immature response. I know acting out can be a natural response, but he also clearly has a lot of growing up to do I don’t necessarily think he looked at the pills and said “oh I’m going to take these as a way to get attention.” I think they were there and they masked the “pain” that he had deep down, which in the end resulted in a cry for help.
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allisong
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Post by allisong on Jan 9, 2018 21:16:06 GMT -6
I can’t believe I’m debating a fictional character. 😮
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dragonflyinn
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Post by dragonflyinn on Jan 9, 2018 21:19:05 GMT -6
I can’t believe I’m debating a fictional character. 😮 Lol— I defend Kevin HARD to friends IRL who watch this show. Probably bc I see a lot of myself in him & in my own childhood as the oldest I often had to play his “role” of the child who had it all together (but really didn’t & needed help too). So I will fight hard for him lol. And then remember he isn’t real...but at the same time that’s why I love this show bc parts of all of them are real bc we can all find parts of ourselves in them!
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budders
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Post by budders on Jan 9, 2018 21:37:33 GMT -6
I have sympathy for Kevin. He's being a bit childish, but it doesn't seem as though their family is practiced in talking through heavy issues like this, especially since Jack died. This is probably the first time they've ever really addressed these issues, so things build up internally over time (much like Kate's perspective on her relationship with her mom).
This episode hits really close to home for me with my mom's alcoholism and visiting her in rehab, so I can't coherently articulate much more than that.
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budders
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Post by budders on Jan 9, 2018 21:38:40 GMT -6
I can’t believe I’m debating a fictional character. 😮 Lol— I defend Kevin HARD to friends IRL who watch this show. Probably bc I see a lot of myself in him & in my own childhood as the oldest I often had to play his “role” of the child who had it all together (but really didn’t & needed help too). So I will fight hard for him lol. And then remember he isn’t real...but at the same time that’s why I love this show bc parts of all of them are real bc we can all find parts of ourselves in them! I'm in this camp too. I identify a lot with many of the things in his storyline recently.
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junch817
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Post by junch817 on Jan 9, 2018 21:55:08 GMT -6
The whole time they were in the room having a blowout, I kept picturing my own family doing that. We are ALL terrible at criticizing each other behind backs, so as to not start any drama. It’s awful. I loved this episode. Very intense and it seemed very relatable to me.
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junch817
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Post by junch817 on Jan 9, 2018 21:56:28 GMT -6
And add me to the club of being even more terrified of screwing up my kids lives because of watching this show.
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Post by shitsngiggles on Jan 10, 2018 5:11:06 GMT -6
This episode got me. With a sister that is my dad's favorite and my mom always bending over backwards for my brother, I've often felt like the odd man out so I identify with Kevin. I've also been the fat kid of the family and feel for Kate. I moved 2 hours away at 18 and never looked back. So when Rebecca mentioned that Randall was the only one that didn't abandon her, it made me wonder if my mom feels that way. And of course now I wonder how my own kids are going to perceive their childhoods. DS1 already tells me that he thinks ds2 is my favorite.
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Post by angelashly on Jan 10, 2018 7:08:30 GMT -6
This convo on the bench is everything. Yes yes yes. This is what they all needed to acknowledge & understand so they could move forward. My favorite part of the whole episode.
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Post by angelashly on Jan 10, 2018 7:09:37 GMT -6
I actually do have a lot of sympathy for him and feel really bad. I do think he wasn’t heard for most of his life. Same. Coming from a family where my mom has a blatant favorite but tries to act like she doesn't it gets to you.
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Post by angelashly on Jan 10, 2018 7:13:22 GMT -6
That cabin scene... Randall is right, everyone has their own version of their childhood. Kevin has a point about being the odd one out in a way, but Rebecca certainly loved him and meant well. This makes me so sad about how my boys already fight for attention, and how perceived slights could impact our relationships. Count on this show to get me so emotional. It makes me sad that neither Kevin nor Rebecca can remember those moments even though they had them. And I do agree with the counselor that Rebecca didn't say anything about Jack missing anything of Kevin's like his movie or anything. Plus it made me sad when she said it was easier with Randall. I know it is true, but it crushed me to hear her say it to him
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ceejay
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Post by ceejay on Jan 10, 2018 9:42:29 GMT -6
I've actually never liked Kevin but I started to feel some sympathy for him this episode.
I think that Kevin and his parents got in a cycle when he was young that continues to this day... he acts like the tough guy and like he doesn't need his parents, they perceive this and give more attention and affection to Kate and Randall, then Kevin sees that and it fuels his attitude of being the tough guy who doesn't need anyone. Nothing ever broke the cycle until maybe this episode when they finally talked about some of their issues openly, so it just kept continuing, leaving Kevin feeling isolated and alone, but continuing to outwardly act like he was happy.
This helped me understand Kevin's character better and why he puts on the act that he always does. I liked this episode a lot.
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Post by angelashly on Jan 10, 2018 9:47:26 GMT -6
I've actually never liked Kevin but I started to feel some sympathy for him this episode. I think that Kevin and his parents got in a cycle when he was young that continues to this day... he acts like the tough guy and like he doesn't need his parents, they perceive this and give more attention and affection to Kate and Randall, then Kevin sees that and it fuels his attitude of being the tough guy who doesn't need anyone. Nothing ever broke the cycle until maybe this episode when they finally talked about some of their issues openly, so it just kept continuing, leaving Kevin feeling isolated and alone, but continuing to outwardly act like he was happy. This helped me understand Kevin's character better and why he puts on the act that he always does. I liked this episode a lot. Yes. I think it hit me really when Beth said something about actor Kevin and I wanted to scream you guys don't see that he is an actor therefore he knows how to put on an act that he is all good. I feel that the family (well maybe Randall and Kate a little) don't even really know the real Kevin. I don't think Kevin even fully knows the real Kevin
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junch817
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Post by junch817 on Jan 10, 2018 15:53:10 GMT -6
Just throwing this out there - if you use Instagram, you should follow Mandy. She’s always posting stories with the cast members and behind the scene stuff. It’s pretty fun to see as a fan of the show. I love when she posts stuff with the kids 🙂
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Post by icedcoffee on Jan 10, 2018 19:37:32 GMT -6
I emphasized with Kevin a lot this episode. I'm the oldest by a decent age gap, 6&8 years between me and my brothers, and I've always felt like I wasn't the favorite. My mom has told me before that I've always been independent and I guess I always played up that role. But they have def done more and given more attention to my brothers over the years. I know deep down they don't love me less, but I agree with Kevin saying that I wish they could just admit it lol. I actually kind of figured something like this was coming, because i feel like they've showed a few scenes now where Randall had Rebecca and Kate had Jack, and Kevin was just kind of there
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crazydoglady
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Post by crazydoglady on Jan 10, 2018 21:01:26 GMT -6
I really like how this show tries to make it so realistic. I think most families have a child that feels this way at some point.
I also love how relatable Beth's emotions were.
Like ok even if he didn't know my daughter was in the car then it is supposed to be ok that he put everyone else on the road in danger... no
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Post by benandjerrys on Jan 10, 2018 21:12:53 GMT -6
I think their perspectives, while obviously different, have the advantage of being all the same age.
I am the youngest by a lot, and I could relate to that family therapy session so much, but in my world my brothers would have been telling me that my memory was wrong because I was younger. That was my whole childhood. It's nice that they at least don't have that to throw in each other's faces.
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Post by leatherpants on Jan 11, 2018 0:02:10 GMT -6
Well I just sobbed my way through that episode. Woof. That was a rough one.
I have always felt a lot of sympathy for Kevin because it’s so easy to dismiss him. Oh man and when Randall laid into him about not being an addict but just an attention seeker? Ouch.
I enjoyed it a lot but it really poked a bit close to home.
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Post by thankfulsnail on Jan 11, 2018 10:47:45 GMT -6
The biggest things that bothered me in this episode- when Kate apologized to Kevin for "taking her eye off the ball" and no one said that's not her job. WTF? Kevin is 36 years old, he does not need a babysitter and Kate certainly should not be shouldering that guilt because she was for once, focused on herself and dealing with a trauma.
Also, was frustrated when Kevin and his therapist thought it would be ok for him to inform her she has an addiction. Way to deflect. Kate is aware of her food issues, it's up to her to deal with them, not up to him to play armchair psychologist.
MH related a lot to Kevin in this episode and we had a very insightful talk about his childhood after we watched. I usually am not a Kevin fan but I felt a lot of sympathy for him in this one and I feel like I understand him better, although I do think it's time he grows up and takes responsibility for his actions. I'm ok with him saying this is where his addiction stemmed from, but he's an adult and needs to make adult choices to improve his future.
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Post by reginaphalange8 on Jan 11, 2018 19:59:28 GMT -6
Ugh, I hated Randall in the therapy scene. He was awful.
Yeah, Kevin's an ass at times but the guys got issues and an addiction problem. I felt for him.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 11, 2018 22:01:09 GMT -6
I hated the therapist. I would been out the door the first time she told me to hush.
The glasses part about childhood is so true. My younger brother is an addict and he remembers things so differently than the rest of us.
Where are y'all learning about Randall and Beth adopting? I didn't see anything in the preview
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whatsit
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Post by whatsit on Jan 11, 2018 22:04:08 GMT -6
I hated the therapist. I would been out the door the first time she told me to hush. The glasses part about childhood is so true. My younger brother is an addict and he remembers things so differently than the rest of us. Where are y'all learning about Randall and Beth adopting? I didn't see anything in the preview I think there was just speculation about the adoption with the clip of the little boy needing a placement - right after Deja returned home. Hasn’t been mentioned the last few episodes with everything else going on.
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budders
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Post by budders on Jan 11, 2018 22:05:35 GMT -6
Where are y'all learning about Randall and Beth adopting? I didn't see anything in the preview At the end of the last episode (the midseason finale), Randall and Beth were discussing opening their home to another child, and they showed a little boy, about 5 years old. So they led us to believe that would be a story line coming after the break.
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tgrimes
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Post by tgrimes on Jan 12, 2018 10:18:04 GMT -6
Definitely terrified of fucking up my kids after watching this episode.
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tgrimes
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Post by tgrimes on Jan 12, 2018 10:19:13 GMT -6
Beth made me laugh a lot with her little one liners.
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Post by reginaphalange8 on Jan 12, 2018 14:07:59 GMT -6
I think a big take away from this episode for parents is that kids aren't usually jerks for no reason. Kevin was shitty to Randall because he felt that Randall got all the attention. Whether that is true or not, or you see that as a parent or not, that's the way he felt. Yes it's frustrating but I think that's why couldn't have done a better job trying to figure it out and not assume everything was Kevin's fault ie: stealing Randall's glasses.
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lucylou
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Post by lucylou on Jan 12, 2018 16:26:25 GMT -6
I'm still a couple episodes beind (I had a baby right before season 2 started back up and I've just gotten a chance to binge it the last few days). I am loving this season, even more than season 1 and I skipped reading this thread because of spoilers, but I have to get my theory about Jack's death out there. Again, I'm 1 or 2 episodes behind, so something may still happen that would contradict my theory but here it goes...
Ok, so in one episode Kevin said something to Kate about sitting across the street eating fast food. Even if it's "the spot where he left." It makes me think he died across the street from the house. Combine that with the fact that Kate feels responsible for his death, and that his things in the car with Rebecca weren't burned...what if 1) the house catches fire, they all get out and get across the street. Kate realizes her dog is in there and runs back in, Jack freaks out and has a heart attack. OR 2) House catches fire, Kate's trying to get the dog, Jack is trying to find her and passes out from smoke inhalation. The family finds him and gets him across the street but he passes anyways. I could totally see that scene- the 4 of them all carrying his body away from the burning house...
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