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Post by clementine on Apr 17, 2018 19:47:24 GMT -6
Who coined the phrase “sleep like a baby” anyway?
Anyone having baby sleep issues? Maybe some BTDT mamas can share what worked for them? Or we can all just complain and commiserate...
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Post by clementine on Apr 17, 2018 19:59:31 GMT -6
At 2 months, I know it’s too soon to start any sort of sleep training, but I would like to find something that works other than rocking/bouncing forever, transferring as carefully as can be, and then having to do it all over again when he wakes up 30 min later. Even if we hold and rock him for a whole nap, he still is constantly squirming and waking up, needing shushing and butt pats to keep him asleep. Is it too early to try to get some self soothing skills or hope that he’ll be able to fall back asleep on his own? Are these just unrealistic expectations of a FTM?
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Post by leatherpants on Apr 17, 2018 22:35:05 GMT -6
Check out Precious Little Sleep website. I adore her and I read every single post with L who was such a crappy sleeper.
Also we have success with the 5 Ss and the Happiest Baby on the Block.
B is so far better than L at sleeping. I swear I have PTSD.
And I’ll confess now, we are swing people. L refused to be put down and was a total motion junkie. When I got the swing and put him in it, it was a game changer. B doesn’t seem to love it as much though so if he starts wanting to be held, I’m fucked.
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Post by leatherpants on Apr 17, 2018 22:40:56 GMT -6
And as a caveat - I think half of the success wth B is residual from the NICU. And anything that worked with L was a result of throwing everything against the wall and hoping something worked. And if it worked one night, it wouldn’t the next.
Like I said PTSD.
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Post by sweetc129 on Apr 17, 2018 22:47:06 GMT -6
J is 6 weeks and sleeps like a baby. I usually get 2-3 hour first and second stretches after that I hope for hour stretches.
I’m doing with him as I did with my girls, who were ok sleepers. From 9pm-7am he is in his nursery with the lights out and sound machine on. If he’s awake I’m just with him (as I am now). I start a routine starting right away (turn on low light, diaper, sound machine, fan, lights out, nurse).
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Post by katietopaz on Apr 17, 2018 23:25:47 GMT -6
+1,000 to leatherpants recommendation of Precious Little Sleep. I must have read every article on her blog with DS1’s insane sleep shenanigans. She came out with a book in the past year and I’m actually reading it now, it’s wonderful. See also: the Facebook group (same name) which is great for specific sleep questions, commiseration, etc. While 2 months is too young for “sleep training,” I don’t think it’s too early to start trying for some good sleep habits. Putting down drowsy but awake (LOL this never worked with DS1 but I hear it works with some babies), a bedtime routine at an age-appropriate time, some consistent sleep associations, etc. I’m mostly parroting from the PLS blog/book. I’m kind of sitting on leatherpants bench with some PTSD from DS1’s sleep. So much time Googling and reading everything baby sleep related. ETA: Here’s a good starting point for the PLS blog and where our babies are at: www.preciouslittlesleep.com/newborn-baby-sleep-survival-guide/
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Post by leatherpants on Apr 18, 2018 2:07:27 GMT -6
katietopaz, I just downloaded her book! I’m thinking it will be my motn reading for awhile.
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Post by nevertoomanyshoes on Apr 18, 2018 3:50:56 GMT -6
Add me to the first child sleep PTSD club. DS1 was a terrible sleeper- didn’t nap during the day without being held, up every 45 minutes on a bad night, two hourly on a good (would only nurse to sleep etc etc).
For us the 4 month sleep regression hit hard- the beginnings of good habits he had started to develop (sucking on his fingers to soothe a little) went out the window, ran down the street and did not return lol.
I ended up working with a sleep consultant who tailored a schedule and plan specific to DS1 and his other issues (tongue tie, reluctance to try solids) and to suit me too. We worked with her a few times as he had different sleep issues as time went on. She was worth every cent and more. It got to a point before we first used her that DS1 seemed to lose his personality because he was so chronically over tired- he was a mess. I added it up and he was getting 8-9 hours of broken sleep in a 24 hour period at 5 months.
For DS1, he needed a pitch black room to sleep. I nursed him to sleep for the first 5 months as he just wouldn’t do the “drowsy but awake” thing. But in saying that, sleep consultant had me teach him to do that as first task at 5.5!months and it really helped the length of his night stretches.
I would suggest introducing positive sleep association things like white noise ASAP- they might not “do” much now but as baby gets older it helps the sleep routine. I bought a baby shusher for DS1 when he was 5 months and he still uses it now at almost 3 years old.
So far I think DS2 is a bit better at day sleep than DS1 was but I’m not holding my breath!
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snowmoon
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Post by snowmoon on Apr 18, 2018 3:56:18 GMT -6
The 4 month sleep regression was when everything went to shit for us too. We endes up bedsharing until like 18 months. He didn't start falling sleep on his own until he was well past two. Naps were dumb and he didn't have one anywhere but on me or next to me for over a year.
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Post by leatherpants on Apr 18, 2018 5:16:01 GMT -6
Oh man, nothing made me crazier than 45 min wakeups.
I’d arrange my entire day around making sure we were home and in his own space for naps and sleep and then go through the production of getting him to sleep, just for him to wake up screaming at 45 mins. Which is no time at all. So many tears. His and mine.
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polson
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Post by polson on Apr 18, 2018 5:26:11 GMT -6
dd1 was also a terrible sleeper. the 4 month regression was absolute hell and i’m not sure i would have survived it if i hadn’t been living with my mom (h was in another state working and getting house sold and i was dealing with family stuff). to be honest i am counting the days until september until we can sleep train. that was the turning point for us. i was gifted healthy sleep habits, happy child by weissbluth and found it to be helpful. we will probably start with more of a routine here soon, but for now we put dd1 down around 715 for the night. i nurse dd2 and usually hold her until she’s out while h and i watch jeopardy. i swaddle her and put her in crib anywhere from 830-9. she does naps in the rnp in the living room for now. i know that i need to start thinking about drowsy but awake soon, but for now this is working so i am sticking with it until it doesn’t.
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Post by clementine on Apr 18, 2018 5:30:41 GMT -6
Man, first child sleep patterns are not looking good around here! I’m sorry you all had such a hard time with your firsts! Fx these babies are all better sleepers.
He really doesn’t have a “bedtime”. I’ve tried to get him down after his feed around 8/9/10, but that’s when he’ll just sleep for a half hour and then won’t go back down until 11 or midnight. We do swaddle, white noise, rock until completely passed out and then down in the pnp. If he wakes up, we’ll let him squirm/grunt to see if he falls back asleep on his own, and if it escalates to a cry, we pick him up and rock until he’s out again. We’ve tried a pacifier, but he doesn’t hold it in his mouth well so it falls out and we’re constantly putting it back in... I do not want to live that life.
Do you do diaper changes MOTN if it’s just pee? L cannot stand a wet diaper, so he’ll just keep waking up and squirming if he’s wet, but then changing it wakes him up even more and we start the whole fall asleep process again.
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Post by clementine on Apr 18, 2018 5:32:18 GMT -6
Also this 4 month sleep regression sounds terrifying. I’m stressed about sleep now... I think I might die at 4 months.
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Post by leatherpants on Apr 18, 2018 5:43:18 GMT -6
I change his diaper before every feed and at night I lather on Vaseline on his bum so there’s a barrier if he poops. So far that’s going well but he is def more fussy when he has a dirty diaper. Not so much pee but poops
We have a bit of a routine but nothing super solid yet. I turn down all the lights in the house around 7 and at his 6/7/8 pm feed, I’ll change his bum first, put him in his pjs and then feed. Usually then I put him in then swing so I can get the other one to bed. Then I wake him up 2 hrs later to feed him and then put him in his basinette. When he’s in the basinette, the white noise is on
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Post by leatherpants on Apr 18, 2018 5:43:53 GMT -6
Sleep training saved all of us for L and I plan on doing it sooner with B if needed
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cornpop
Amethyst
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Post by cornpop on Apr 18, 2018 6:36:48 GMT -6
Em was a sleep unicorn so I don't have much advice.
But when I had her there was this magic white noise track that made the rounds and I swear helped especially for naptime. If you're interested in it, I could send you (or anyone) the MP3 if you want to PM me your email address.
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Post by clementine on Apr 18, 2018 7:33:04 GMT -6
This is likely a dumb question, but here I go anyway. When baby wakes MOTN, how do you know if it’s bc he’s hungry or just sleeping terribly? We’ve been trying to go 5 hours between feeds at night. L will wake up MOTN anywhere from 2-4 hours since his last feed. He’s out in the living room with H most nights, so H will try to get him back to sleep and he usually goes back down with some help, but he’s up again in another hour or so. Should I be nursing when he wakes up?
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Leaf 🌱
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Post by Leaf 🌱 on Apr 18, 2018 7:55:43 GMT -6
This is likely a dumb question, but here I go anyway. When baby wakes MOTN, how do you know if it’s bc he’s hungry or just sleeping terribly? We’ve been trying to go 5 hours between feeds at night. L will wake up MOTN anywhere from 2-4 hours since his last feed. He’s out in the living room with H most nights, so H will try to get him back to sleep and he usually goes back down with some help, but he’s up again in another hour or so. Should I be nursing when he wakes up? Theres no good answer but I’d say probably. If he’s awake enough and giving hunger cues, then nurse. IME 5 hours is a lot to ask of a young BF baby - others may feel differently though. Especially if he’s just waking up again pretty quickly, he’s likely hungry. BM gets digested so freaking fast it feels unfair With DD1 I always let her fuss for a few minutes before nursing. 1/3 of the time she’d put herself back to sleep. Sometimes I’d hit the vibrate button on the RNP or whatever if she had nurses in the last 1-2 hours.
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Post by leatherpants on Apr 18, 2018 8:04:01 GMT -6
I agree with Leaf 🌱 that 5 hours is a long time for BF baby at this point. Especially more than once a night. And I also agree that I let B fuss for a bit to see if it’s worth getting up for. If it’s past the 2.5 hr point, it’s usually time to nurse.
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Post by leatherpants on Apr 18, 2018 8:08:24 GMT -6
This is likely a dumb question, but here I go anyway. When baby wakes MOTN, how do you know if it’s bc he’s hungry or just sleeping terribly? We’ve been trying to go 5 hours between feeds at night. L will wake up MOTN anywhere from 2-4 hours since his last feed. He’s out in the living room with H most nights, so H will try to get him back to sleep and he usually goes back down with some help, but he’s up again in another hour or so. Should I be nursing when he wakes up? But as to your first question, I actually don’t know. I usually go by time. If it’s close to the time to eat, I’ll feed him. I have limited brain power at night
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Leaf 🌱
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Post by Leaf 🌱 on Apr 18, 2018 8:11:47 GMT -6
This is likely a dumb question, but here I go anyway. When baby wakes MOTN, how do you know if it’s bc he’s hungry or just sleeping terribly? We’ve been trying to go 5 hours between feeds at night. L will wake up MOTN anywhere from 2-4 hours since his last feed. He’s out in the living room with H most nights, so H will try to get him back to sleep and he usually goes back down with some help, but he’s up again in another hour or so. Should I be nursing when he wakes up? But as to your first question, I actually don’t know. I usually go by time. If it’s close to the time to eat, I’ll feed him. I have limited brain power at night clementine if he won’t settle or is making “smacking” lips, opening/closing his mouth, rooting (nuzzling the shirt of who ever is holding him) then those are all good signs he’s hungry. Sometimes you can kind of gently touch their cheek and if they immediately open their mouths and turn towards your finger, they’re looking for a boob.
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Post by clementine on Apr 18, 2018 9:17:38 GMT -6
Leaf 🌱 and leatherpants thanks for your input! H is usually good about reading his hunger cues, but I also think he tries to settle him when he can so I can get some sleep. I’ll try nursing when he wakes and see how that goes.
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Post by alwayscheese on Apr 18, 2018 14:16:37 GMT -6
Em was a sleep unicorn so I don't have much advice. But when I had her there was this magic white noise track that made the rounds and I swear helped especially for naptime. If you're interested in it, I could send you (or anyone) the MP3 if you want to PM me your email address. I love the relaxio app because you can customize your white noise. But I hated having my phone and speaker tied up because I voice message my friends a lot. Now I got a sound machine that goes everywhere with him.
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Post by alwayscheese on Apr 18, 2018 14:22:15 GMT -6
I spent an hour or so the other night reading the sleep thread on the infants board. DS sleeps now 🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞 but now I am scared for the future. I hear there is something called 4 month sleep regression. 😬
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Post by mintyblueair on Apr 18, 2018 17:14:57 GMT -6
I spent an hour or so the other night reading the sleep thread on the infants board. DS sleeps now 🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞 but now I am scared for the future. I hear there is something called 4 month sleep regression. 😬 My son was always a good sleeper. I never paid any attention to the idea of regressions and I never noticed him to have one 🤷. So it's possible that yours will stay good at sleeping! This baby, on the other hand, sleeps less with each day that passes and I am at a loss as to how to settle her and get her to stay asleep. I'm exhausted and distraught.
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Post by clementine on Apr 18, 2018 17:23:59 GMT -6
I spent an hour or so the other night reading the sleep thread on the infants board. DS sleeps now 🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞 but now I am scared for the future. I hear there is something called 4 month sleep regression. 😬 If only our babies could be alike in this way too!
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Post by sweetc129 on Apr 22, 2018 8:15:13 GMT -6
2 nights in a row I got two 3 hour stretches!! Hope we continue this trend!
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Post by nuggetrn on Apr 22, 2018 18:41:13 GMT -6
Check out Precious Little Sleep website. I adore her and I read every single post with L who was such a crappy sleeper. Also we have success with the 5 Ss and the Happiest Baby on the Block. B is so far better than L at sleeping. I swear I have PTSD. And I’ll confess now, we are swing people. L refused to be put down and was a total motion junkie. When I got the swing and put him in it, it was a game changer. B doesn’t seem to love it as much though so if he starts wanting to be held, I’m fucked. DD didn't really care about the swing til about a week ago. She would chill in it for a few, blinking at you... nothing too exciting. But, a week ago she started falling asleep in the swing if I set her in it while she was calm. Sooo many awesome swing naps!! Yay! Which is amazing because she has been an awful napper during the day.
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Post by clementine on Apr 23, 2018 11:40:23 GMT -6
I might try the swing for sleeping after reading Precious Little Sleep.
I am so ready for him to take longer naps anywhere else but in my arms. If I lay him down anywhere, he wakes up after 25-30 min every time. He’ll sleep for a good 1-1.5 hours if I’m holding him though.
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Post by leatherpants on Apr 23, 2018 12:05:17 GMT -6
I bought a rock n play today. I can’t safely elevate the basinette any higher than it is and it’s not enough. And the swing doesn’t fit in my bedroom.
I’ve been reading Precious Little Sleep during motn feedings. I’m so glad she’s funny.
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