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Post by summer on Jul 19, 2017 9:58:29 GMT -6
This is something I continue to struggle with, and I really can't pinpoint why. I know when I take it, it helps my mental well-being and my relationships with my kids, but I still struggle to make it happen regularly and I still wrestle with incredible guilt over it - even if it's just a couple of hours away, even when I set the kids up going somewhere or doing something I know they love.
Are you taking "me time" regularly? What do you do? How do you combat the evil guilt monster? Is your spouse/partner supportive?
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Post by wineandcake on Jul 19, 2017 14:28:37 GMT -6
Honestly, my me time is hiding in the bathroom with my phone for 10 minutes :/
I just started working full time 10hr days Monday-Thursday so I barely see the boys. I feel so guilty about it that I don't do anything for myself. H isn't overly supportive of me doing things alone. He goes to the gym every morning, and goes on fishing/hunting trips. I feel like me going out for an afternoon is a big deal because he always makes comments about me not wanting to be with them if I leave or implying I should take a kid with me. I don't think he realizes it, but it does make me feel guilty and less inclined to plan something.
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Post by wineandcake on Jul 19, 2017 14:31:44 GMT -6
Example - I had a consult for microblading last night. I was home 20 minutes later than usual. I got a text from him asking why I was so late. I told him the night before, but he forgot. Then was asking why I needed a consult and such, why not just do it. I know he was asking because he waits until I get home to eat and he was hungry, but seriously, it was 20 minutes! Just be happy I'm putting this effort into myself so I don't look like such a dirtbag for the next year and a half.
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Minerva
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Post by Minerva on Jul 19, 2017 16:34:48 GMT -6
I'm not getting much me-time at the moment. Workout time, the occasional happy hour, and weekend solo Target runs are pretty much it.
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Post by sjames2015 on Jul 20, 2017 22:47:36 GMT -6
I only get semi me time after the kids and husband go to bed. It's anywhere from 20 minutes to 2 hours. H's hours keep me from getting actual me time. He is only home and awake for around 4 hours when he works day shift and 3-3.5 hours when he works night shift. On his 7 days off we are going going going to get stuff done that needs it and we couldn't do when he works.
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Post by kleigh926 on Jul 21, 2017 4:41:01 GMT -6
I rarely leave the house to go do something alone, and honestly, that doesn't really bother me. I'm more of a homebody and going out occasionally with a friend or my mom is enough for me. What I do struggle with is not getting much alone time at home. I really miss the days of both kids napping in the afternoons. I feel like that break was crucial for me, especially because DD doesn't relax well. Even with her kindle or a movie in the afternoon, she can still be attention-seeking and will panic if she doesn't know exactly where I am (obviously I am never far). And if I do get a few minutes to sit down and relax, she'll come over and sit right next to me, which is sweet but sometimes I just need to be alone for a little while and get a break 😩
Our summer has been so busy, it often comes down to sacrificing sleep for "me-time" after the kids are in bed. I haven't been sleeping well lately and have been going to bed later than I should just so I can read or catch up on Facebook.
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Post by holly321 on Jul 28, 2017 10:04:44 GMT -6
My kids go to bed between 7 and 8, so I get plenty of me time once they are asleep. And every Friday, my mom go out to Target, the grocery store and dinner.
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Post by crimsonandclover on Jul 30, 2017 5:42:51 GMT -6
When the kiddos are in bed I usually work on my freelance stuff, so I wouldn't call it relaxing me-time. Otherwise no. Tuesday evenings I have orchestra rehearsal and DH is in charge of dinner and bedtime, although he often delays bedtime until I get home, which makes me all  DH sometimes encourages me to get out more, but he's not home enough in the evenings for me to plan things regularly and I don't know who I would go out with. Most of my friendly acquaintances now are local moms who also can't spontaneously go out for an evening. |
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sagen
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Post by sagen on Jul 30, 2017 23:21:27 GMT -6
Lately it feels like there is always one kid or another by me literally every minute I a m awake. Once school starts, I think I will try to be better about playing guitar when the baby is napping. I started playing a few years ago, and took lessons for awhile, but I have been busy. Also I need to start working out again. Those two things, along with vegging out to Netflix are my ways to unwind.
I need to push the baby's bed time back. Having trouble figuring out that one. He sleeps an amazing solid 8 hours, but he is wide awake from about 8-1030 or 11, my previous kids are in bed relax time :/ I am worried about messing with it too much because I enjoy the STTN.
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Minerva
Ruby
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Post by Minerva on Jul 31, 2017 8:59:23 GMT -6
Lately it feels like there is always one kid or another by me literally every minute I a m awake. Once school starts, I think I will try to be better about playing guitar when the baby is napping. I started playing a few years ago, and took lessons for awhile, but I have been busy. Also I need to start working out again. Those two things, along with vegging out to Netflix are my ways to unwind. I need to push the baby's bed time back. Having trouble figuring out that one. He sleeps an amazing solid 8 hours, but he is wide awake from about 8-1030 or 11, my previous kids are in bed relax time :/ I am worried about messing with it too much because I enjoy the STTN. Sent from my SM-G950U using Tapatalk It sounds like our babies have similar sleep patterns. I loooove that DD sttn, but she often doesn't fall asleep until quite late. It really cuts into me time and time with DH. Her bedtime has crept up to 9pm over the past month. I really hope that by the start of school in Sept, both kids will be asleep by 8:30pm. |
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Post by mishka29 on Aug 7, 2017 19:00:28 GMT -6
Honestly, my me time is hiding in the bathroom with my phone for 10 minutes :/ I just started working full time 10hr days Monday-Thursday so I barely see the boys. I feel so guilty about it that I don't do anything for myself. H isn't overly supportive of me doing things alone. He goes to the gym every morning, and goes on fishing/hunting trips. I feel like me going out for an afternoon is a big deal because he always makes comments about me not wanting to be with them if I leave or implying I should take a kid with me. I don't think he realizes it, but it does make me feel guilty and less inclined to plan something. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Maybe I'm just a dick about things like that but I would totally throw his time away back in his face. Suggest he take a kid with him fishing or ask why he doesn't want to spent time with his family. If dh can't put himself in my shoes then I'm going to force them on his feet! Lol |
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Post by mishka29 on Aug 7, 2017 19:03:30 GMT -6
I don't do a lot of things just myself. I have dinner with friends once every couple of months. But generally I don't have a lot of places to go lol
This weekend the kids were at the IL's so I did some cleaning, got a massage, shopping ALONE, watched a lot of tv. It was nice.
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DH sometimes encourages me to get out more, but he's not home enough in the evenings for me to plan things regularly and I don't know who I would go out with. Most of my friendly acquaintances now are local moms who also can't spontaneously go out for an evening. 
