stringy
Opal
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Post by stringy on Jan 22, 2021 10:46:43 GMT -6
I'm outsourcing something I was tasked. Since you are all here today...
Tell me about the ways in which you celebrate milestones or have rituals around them.
Things such as anniversaries, birthdays, new jobs, deaths, new babies, graduations, etc...
And...something more than birthday cake and presents or...dinner. Since my life is stuck in those places.
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Post by ovenrack on Jan 22, 2021 10:55:41 GMT -6
You mean social distancing-friendly ways?
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stringy
Opal
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Post by stringy on Jan 22, 2021 10:57:05 GMT -6
You mean social distancing-friendly ways? No, not necessarily, this is more hypothetical/life planning type |
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milano
Emerald
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Post by milano on Jan 22, 2021 10:57:23 GMT -6
Hmm.
New babies - I love buying presents for babies/new parents and try to always send something anytime anyone close to me has a baby. I try to be very thoughtful about what I send and make it as personal but useful as possible.
Birthdays - for my kids, we do presents, let them choose dinner and what kind of cake or dessert they would like. We have had a party of some sort for every birthday so far, except J's last year.
for my friends and other non-immediate family members, I try to at minimum send a card. If I see something or think of something I can have delivered that they will love I arrange it but I never spend a lot of time worrying about what to "get" someone. Some years I don't even give my own parents presents, if nothing appropriate/useful presents itself. I do not like to give gifts just for the sake of giving a gift, they have to be something I know they would truly want or need or use. I also don't expect gifts from anyone for my own birthday, now that I'm apparently considered an adult.
Anniversaries - if I really have my shit together I send a card (I try to at least do that for my parents) but for friends, other family, I just send a quick text or mention it in a phone call. I planned several anniversary parties for my parents when I was younger, will probably do that again when they get to 40 in a couple years.
Graduations we send a card with cash. Weddings we do cash for the wedding, and gifts from the registry for the shower.
Most of my celebrating anything involves sending texts or sending gifts/cash. I could certainly do better.
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Post by Dramaphile on Jan 22, 2021 13:06:39 GMT -6
We are bad at all these things. For birthdays we do cake and presents and balloons and the birthday person gets to pick out a special meal. I'm terrible at sending cards for birthdays etc. I literally buy cards and then forget to send them and then when I remember it's so late that I just never send them. Most of our traditions probably are foods we eat/cook.
I want to have more traditions for holidays and things, maybe we'll develop some over the years.
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Post by charlotte on Jan 22, 2021 14:04:44 GMT -6
I am so bad at this stuff. If money wasn’t a factor I’d love to travel annually for our anniversary with no kids. We’ve done that a few times.
I want to start doing an annual family camping trip for MH’s birthday. I mean *I* don’t actually have a burning desire to camp but he’d love it.
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tj
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Post by tj on Jan 22, 2021 14:09:49 GMT -6
I am so bad at this stuff. If money wasn’t a factor I’d love to travel annually for our anniversary with no kids. We’ve done that a few times. I want to start doing an annual family camping trip for MH’s birthday. I mean *I* don’t actually have a burning desire to camp but he’d love it. Let’s camp together!! Our kids can play. You and I can paint nails and do yoga and cook in the camper. And the husbands and be manly. It’ll be great! |
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tj
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Post by tj on Jan 22, 2021 14:11:08 GMT -6
Is this where I’m supposed to say that we celebrate milestones by marking them in our ever-important scrapbooks and baby books and travel journals? Cuz we don’t do that shit but it would be so Pinterest if we did.
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Post by charlotte on Jan 22, 2021 14:13:03 GMT -6
I am so bad at this stuff. If money wasn’t a factor I’d love to travel annually for our anniversary with no kids. We’ve done that a few times. I want to start doing an annual family camping trip for MH’s birthday. I mean *I* don’t actually have a burning desire to camp but he’d love it. Let’s camp together!! Our kids can play. You and I can paint nails and do yoga and cook in the camper. And the husbands and be manly. It’ll be great! Um why is there no mention of alcohol in this post? I feel attacked. |
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tj
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Post by tj on Jan 22, 2021 14:13:22 GMT -6
But sometimes I have to close truly momentous chapters of my life by marking it on my skin. I.e. tattoos. Mine are closing painful chapters but I know a lot of people use tattoos to celebrate as well.
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tj
Moderator
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Post by tj on Jan 22, 2021 14:13:47 GMT -6
Let’s camp together!! Our kids can play. You and I can paint nails and do yoga and cook in the camper. And the husbands and be manly. It’ll be great! Um why is there no mention of alcohol in this post? I feel attacked. Oh Bc it’s dry January and I’m sober. But I won’t judge you. |
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Speedy
Sapphire
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Post by Speedy on Jan 22, 2021 18:27:11 GMT -6
For other people? I like to either put together a gift basket based on a theme (movie night, wine and cheese, tea time, etc) or give books. When a friend of mine had a little girl I gave her a copy of The Little Princess, and one gift basket in particular that was special was a microwaveable tub of popcorn filled with candy and chocolate and a gift card to rent a movie.
For us I'm not great and it usually winds up just being a special dinner, or I throw myself a party lol
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stringy
Opal
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Post by stringy on Jan 23, 2021 7:58:13 GMT -6
Hmmm...so nothing more than what i really do...
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Post by ovenrack on Jan 23, 2021 8:10:06 GMT -6
LOL, this is funny. What is this for?
I’ve been trying to sew things for new babies. Either something big, like a stuffie with a rattle inside, or a simple bib, or a taggie blanket.
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stringy
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Post by stringy on Jan 23, 2021 8:38:51 GMT -6
Therapy assignment lol.
I tend to downplay celebrations - my recent 40th, our anniversary, even things like christmas. It annoys me that my mom does this and always has - so clearly i've learned pieces of it - but I don't know how to really change it or make "radical" new rituals and traditions.
I'm sure it doesn't make sense out of context.
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tj
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Post by tj on Jan 23, 2021 8:56:16 GMT -6
Cheating on your homework? Shame.
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stringy
Opal
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Post by stringy on Jan 23, 2021 9:24:44 GMT -6
Cheating on your homework? Shame. Oh I was honest and said i was going to google. You all are just a more personal form of googling |
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tj
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Post by tj on Jan 23, 2021 10:09:59 GMT -6
Cheating on your homework? Shame. Oh I was honest and said i was going to google. You all are just a more personal form of googling Just teasing. But I’m curious what type of celebrating we ought to be doing. |
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stringy
Opal
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Post by stringy on Jan 23, 2021 10:51:42 GMT -6
Oh I was honest and said i was going to google. You all are just a more personal form of googling Just teasing. But I’m curious what type of celebrating we ought to be doing. I'm not sure there is an ought. If you get enough from what you do - all is well.
I have issues about...being invisible and pushed aside...so..shrug.
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DGM
Sapphire
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Post by DGM on Jan 23, 2021 20:42:45 GMT -6
Late to this party but my first thought was I do half-birthdays for my kids. Just the 4 of us with half portions of a treat and it's only because their birthdays are the same week. So I'm just trying to give another reason to make them feel special even though it's once again 3 days apart.
As for MH and I, we take a picture of just the two of us on our anniversary every year bc his grandparents did it for 60+ years. Their anniversary album was amazing to look through while they were alive and after they died. ETA too many words
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Post by ovenrack on Jan 24, 2021 10:18:11 GMT -6
Considering A and I did literally nothing special for our anniversary, it’s hard for me to answer. LOL.
We are working on making a bigger deal out of things we can celebrate this year - for birthdays, we’ve done presents and dinner and cake. But also - pin the whatever on the whatever, a piñata, listening to a specific playlist, a walk at a favorite place. A scavenger hunt.
My birthday is this week. I know A isn’t great at gifts or planning these things, so I already plan to say that I’m taking off for awhile on Saturday afternoon, and that I want takeout for dinner, and I don’t want to have to order it.
I understand what you meant about feeling overlooked. I’ve realized that I entered a legal relationship with a person who needs to be told - so I’ll tell him. Maybe, some time, he will be able to take some steps alone. Until then, I’ll say what I want, instead of hinting.
This is a hard year to make special things happen, if you want people other than your household around, and January in New England doesn’t help. Hugs.
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stringy
Opal
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Post by stringy on Jan 24, 2021 15:24:41 GMT -6
ovenrack, yea, the overlooking is more historical than current. BM would rather be over the top for all things! So that helps, and also helped me realize what I was missing. Where will you get takeout?
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Post by ovenrack on Jan 24, 2021 18:57:06 GMT -6
ovenrack , yea, the overlooking is more historical than current. BM would rather be over the top for all things! So that helps, and also helped me realize what I was missing. Where will you get takeout? I don't know. I'm so tired of all the local places! Actually, maybe I'll get something from your town. Omg, maybe I'll get Indian! A doesn't prefer it, but it's MY BIRTHDAY. Oh, I just got super excited. H's birthday is Thursday, so we will probably be getting takeout chicken wings, and I'll roast potatoes and roast brussels sprouts. His current faves. No, I don't want to cook chicken wings. Blah. |
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stringy
Opal
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Post by stringy on Jan 25, 2021 10:33:29 GMT -6
ovenrack , yea, the overlooking is more historical than current. BM would rather be over the top for all things! So that helps, and also helped me realize what I was missing. Where will you get takeout? I don't know. I'm so tired of all the local places! Actually, maybe I'll get something from your town. Omg, maybe I'll get Indian! A doesn't prefer it, but it's MY BIRTHDAY. Oh, I just got super excited. H's birthday is Thursday, so we will probably be getting takeout chicken wings, and I'll roast potatoes and roast brussels sprouts. His current faves. No, I don't want to cook chicken wings. Blah. Where do you get takeout chicken wings from? |
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Post by ovenrack on Jan 25, 2021 10:39:40 GMT -6
I don't know. I'm so tired of all the local places! Actually, maybe I'll get something from your town. Omg, maybe I'll get Indian! A doesn't prefer it, but it's MY BIRTHDAY. Oh, I just got super excited. H's birthday is Thursday, so we will probably be getting takeout chicken wings, and I'll roast potatoes and roast brussels sprouts. His current faves. No, I don't want to cook chicken wings. Blah. Where do you get takeout chicken wings from? Probably just the pizza joint in my town... though, A just told me he's taking off Thursday afternoon for H's birthday, so I will probably get them at the fancy grocery store in your town. |
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