Extended Breastfeeding Check-in/Chat, 9/1-9/15

[vvvvvfee]

For the purposes of this check-in, we will define extended breastfeeding as breastfeeding beyond 1 year. Questions are repeated and suggestions are appreciated!

1. How old is your LO?
2. How many times per day does your LO nurse?
3. Do you still nurse on demand, or have you taken steps to actively drop nursing sessions?
4. Does your LO STTN? When they wake, do you nurse them back to sleep or do you use another method?

Pregnant & BFing/Tandem Nursing Moms: How are you doing? Any issues with supply, pain, aversion? Questions for other moms?

GTKY: Would you rather visit the moon or go on an all-expenses-paid vacation anywhere on Earth?

[vvvvvfee]

1. How old is your LO? 14 months
2. How many times per day does your LO nurse? 5-6
3. Do you still nurse on demand, or have you taken steps to actively drop nursing sessions? Well, I am still nursing on demand at home, but I did stop pumping at work about a week ago, so I guess that counts as actively dropping sessions.
4. Does your LO STTN? When they wake, do you nurse them back to sleep or do you use another method? No... and yes, I still nurse him back to sleep... Ugh. I remember it getting better around 18 months with my previous 2, but it's just not worth it yet to have DH try to soothe him back to sleep. He just screams until he gets boobs.

GTKY: Would you rather visit the moon or go on an all-expenses-paid vacation anywhere on Earth? That is a tough one. It would be really incredible to see the moon (and the Earth as viewed from the moon), but I think I'd be too worried about the danger of it all. Plus it's no picnic actually getting up there. I'd go for a trip somewhere on Earth and hopefully be able to bring the fam with me.

[byjove]

1. 3.75 yo
2. 1-2x
3. I no longer nurse on demand. If she asks not at bedtime, I usually say no now and stick to my guns. She usually doesn't nurse on week day mornings anymore. I am also trying to keep nursing sessions short.
4. She does generally now! That milestone wasn't reached until almost 3, but she has some compounding health issues.

GTKY/ DH would answer moon without a moment's hesitation. I think I'd rather explore this planet for now...

[jt2378]

I guess I'm still here. I think we are slowly weaning but here this week

1. How old is your LO? 2

2. How many times per day does your LO nurse? 1

3. Do you still nurse on demand, or have you taken steps to actively drop nursing sessions? Not on demand. She is really only at wakeup in the mornings.

4. Does your LO STTN? When they wake, do you nurse them back to sleep or do you use another method? STTN (I better not jinx it by saying it) I did nurse back to sleep until about 14 months and then the random times she does wake up, I can just hug her for a quick minute and put her back down. I think when she stopped the bedtime nursing, she wasn't expecting to nurse MOTN so it worked well without even trying. Don't you love when that happens?!


Pregnant & BFing/Tandem Nursing Moms: How are you doing? Any issues with supply, pain, aversion? Questions for other moms?


GTKY: Would you rather visit the moon or go on an all-expenses-paid vacation anywhere on Earth? all-expense paid vacation. I'd probably check out Bali or Tahiti!

[Speedy]

1. How old is your LO?
14 months
2. How many times per day does your LO nurse?
Depends on the day but reliably 3-4 times
3. Do you still nurse on demand, or have you taken steps to actively drop nursing sessions?
Nursing on demand
4. Does your LO STTN? When they wake, do you nurse them back to sleep or do you use another method?
Some nights but generally he's still up 1 or 2 times and I'll nurse him back down.

Pregnant & BFing/Tandem Nursing Moms: How are you doing? Any issues with supply, pain, aversion? Questions for other moms?
No pain but I'm wondering if it's affecting my supply already (I'm 6 weeks). He seems to be getting more frustrated with my boobs lately


GTKY: Would you rather visit the moon or go on an all-expenses-paid vacation anywhere on Earth?
Earth for sure! I want to go toodle around in Europe and visit a whole bunch of castles

[gingy]

1. How old is your LO?
-23 mo--2 years on Monday!

2. How many times per day does your LO nurse?
-2x

3. Do you still nurse on demand, or have you taken steps to actively drop nursing sessions?
-I limit him to 2 times. I'm going to start on dropping a session next week.

4. Does your LO STTN? When they wake, do you nurse them back to sleep or do you use another method?
-He STTN, thank God!

GTKY: Earth vacay, for sure!

Does anyone have favorite resources for weaning? He's so attached to the boob. It's going to be hard on both of us, I think.

[vvvvvfee]

gingy, in order to more easily drop down to 1x per day, i would begin to set a time limit when he's nursing-- for instance, sing a particular song and nursing is all done when you're finished. or set a timer on your phone for a minute (or however long you can tolerate). then if he needs distraction after that, i'd offer some kind of substitute-- cuddles, and maybe he wants a cup of warm cow's milk or some other beverage. or maybe you want to read a book with him. so first drop the one he's least attached to, then you can work on dropping the last one when you're ready. don't go too fast or you risk getting clogged ducts.

[vvvvvfee]

Speedy, i didn't notice my supply really dropping until more towards the end of 1st trimester. but the taste definitely changes during pregnancy so it may already taste different to him. and congrats, btw!

[byjove]

Sept 5, 2019 8:46:00 GMT -6 vvvvvfee said:

Speedy , i didn't notice my supply really dropping until more towards the end of 1st trimester. but the taste definitely changes during pregnancy so it may already taste different to him. and congrats, btw!

I don't think I had any major changes (that made my nursling object) until closer to midway through pregnancy. My DD1 self weaned right at the start of 3rd tri at age 2.

[lily]

1. How old is your LO? - 14mo

2. How many times per day does your LO nurse? - 2-3x day, 0-?? night

3. Do you still nurse on demand, or have you taken steps to actively drop nursing sessions? - demand

4. Does your LO STTN? When they wake, do you nurse them back to sleep or do you use another method? - we bedshare so if he wakes he either lays his head on my stomach & I rub his back & he goes back to sleep or he latches & nurses.


This kid flat out refuses to nurse at bedtime. I’ve tried before bedtime routine; I’ve tried after PJs; I’ve tried after bedtime routine. I’ve tried in the living room, in his room, in his brother’s room, in the spare bedroom, in the shower, in the bath. I’ve tried sitting up, lying down, walking around, bouncing on the yoga ball. He flat out refuses to nurse at bedtime. Doesn’t seem to matter if dinner was early or late, if he ate a bunch or nothing at all.

Then he wakes ~1-1.5 hours after DH puts him to bed & nurses 🙄I mean it works. I can either stay in bed or get up after he’s done & he’s cool either way, I just wish he would nurse at bedtime instead!

GTKY: Would you rather visit the moon or go on an all-expenses-paid vacation anywhere on Earth? - earth

[potatocakes]

1. How old is your LO? 13 months
2. How many times per day does your LO nurse? 3 on average. Occasionally just 2 on work days, and sometimes 4 on weekend days.
3. Do you still nurse on demand, or have you taken steps to actively drop nursing sessions? There's not really time to nurse more than we do already on work days - morning, after work, and bed. On weekends, I usually don't offer until nap time, and he doesn't ask. He eats literally everything, and drinks WCM happily with breakfast or snack, so he's doing just fine. I was actually talking to H last night about how it's nice that it's just extra nutrients for him now, and I have no concerns or worries about how many calories he's getting from me.
4. Does your LO STTN? When they wake, do you nurse them back to sleep or do you use another method? He STTN - when he wakes up usually something is wrong (gas, diaper, etc.) and H has the patience to soothe a baby that I do not. DS takes a pacifier happily, so that's part of the soothing.

GTKY: Would you rather visit the moon or go on an all-expenses-paid vacation anywhere on Earth? Earth, no question!

[vvvvvfee]

lily, do you think his bedtime is too early and so he's too fill of energy to want to nurse? or is he visibly tired at the time you put him to bed?

[byjove]

My nursling threw a toy at me on Saturday and seriously injured my eye (granted I don't think she had any intention of trying to hurt me). I've been feeling strange since then- like my relationship with her has changed on some level. Not that I love her less, but maybe some type of self protection mechanism from the trauma? I then had to be out of town a couple of days. I came back last night and she really wanted milkie and I really didn't want to do it, but told her for just a minute and she had a hard time latching and accidentally bit me pretty hard. So I think I am done. I feel bad that something so traumatic for both of us would be the catalyst for weaning, and we are about to move which I know will be hard, but I have to leave for work again at the end of the month for 4 nights (longest I'll ever be away) and I think that will be that. Almost 4 years. We had a good run.

[vvvvvfee]

byjove, ouch! i hope you got your eye checked out by a doctor and that everything's ok.

it's okay to feel done. i totally get it. i definitely was starting to feel resentful of my DS1 for the last few months that i let him nurse. i think by the time they are this age it's ok to just be honest and say, you know what, kid? you're too big and i just don't want to do this anymore. and they are old enough to accept it. offer hugs, cuddles, warm drinks, whatever, but they can certainly process the transition without being traumatized. i think my DS was holding onto it bc it was a way that i was showing him that i still loved him even though i had DS2 who was now competing for my attention. i think our relationship actually improved after we stopped nursing because i didn't have those resentful feelings towards him anymore. it's ok to have mixed feelings about weaning-- and don't feel guilty! hugs.

[jt2378]

byjove, I'm sorry about your eye and the mixed emotions. Weaning is such a mindfuck I have learned. I'm feeling bad because I'm feeling some resentment with D2 (just turned 2) and wanting to be done but then also just feeling too bad to force it. D1 self weaned at 18 months so this is all new territory to me.

[byjove]

jt2378, vvvvvfee, thank you <3 we'll see how tonight goes. I actually have a concussion of the eye. Who knew that was even possible?

[byjove]

vvvvvfee, one question for you. Do you know how concerned I need to be about clogged ducts or mastitis if we just suddenly stop? Granted, she isn't nursing much or for long, and I can go 3 days without nursing without discomfort. Pretty low?

[jt2378]

You poor thing byjove, that sounds miserable. Can you do anything for it? Hope it feels better soon.

[byjove]

Sept 13, 2019 12:40:38 GMT -6 jt2378 said:

You poor thing byjove , that sounds miserable. Can you do anything for it? Hope it feels better soon.

Thanks! I have some steroid eye drops. Otherwise lots of advil and rest :/

[vvvvvfee]

Sept 13, 2019 12:29:00 GMT -6 byjove said:

vvvvvfee , one question for you. Do you know how concerned I need to be about clogged ducts or mastitis if we just suddenly stop? Granted, she isn't nursing much or for long, and I can go 3 days without nursing without discomfort. Pretty low?

given that your DD is almost 4, and you were keeping nursing short and it sounds like 1x per day... yes, i would think your odds of a problem are low. you could take lecithin supplements for a while since that supposedly helps prevent clogs.

however, i may not be the best person to ask since when i weaned DS1 i was still nursing DS2, and when DS2 stopped i was pregnant with DS3. :/ so if anyone else can chime in with their experience, that'd be great!

[lily]

Sept 12, 2019 10:13:52 GMT -6 vvvvvfee said:

lily, do you think his bedtime is too early and so he's too fill of energy to want to nurse? or is he visibly tired at the time you put him to bed?

He’s definitely tired & goes to sleep easily for DH. Maybe it’s just a slow flow time & he can’t be bothered. DH was out at bedtime last night & DS2 actually nursed a little. I hadn’t offered at bedtime in a week or so.

[lily]

byjove you’ve had a great nursing relationship and I think it’s more than okay to be done, and the ending coming a little more abruptly than you’d thought in no way taints the time y’all shared. Hope your eye heals soon!

[byjove]

Thanks, all! She’s been asking a lot the last couple of days (especially bedtime) to nurse, and I’ve told her that milky is all done, and she whines, but then gets over it quickly. She actually didn’t ask tonight. I think this is it!! I have one slightly tender spot on my right boob when it is bumped the wrong way, so monitoring that, but hopefully it will resolve. No discomfort or fullness otherwise. FX

I appreciate all the support over the years 💗 I’ll lurk from time to time, but feel free to tag me if I might be helpful. I’ve been pregnant and/or nursing for 7 years straight. I don’t know what to do with myself. Ha

[vvvvvfee]

aww congrats byjove! <3