April IUI/IVF/FET

[charliefox]

This year just keeps chugging along. Happy April! 

How is everyone doing?

[charliefox]

Well, we only ended up with 3 embryos, two day 5s and one day 6 but I forgot to ask for grades. We will get the genetic screening results in 7-10 days.

I just feel so defeated. I know I'm a broken record but our first round of IVF was pretty damn easy and we ended up with 3 embryos. This round was TOUGH and we still ended up with 3 embryos. I can't talk to H because he thinks I'm being negative and that my negativity is going to bring us bad luck or something. I have a real hard time believing that we're going to end up with a genetically normal embryo that sticks. Who knows why the first 3 didn't stick so why should another one? Ugh.

Anyway, just waiting on CD1 then I will go on BCP and have my hysteroscopy in those 2 weeks. Once I come off BCP I'll jump into a mock FET cycle for the ERA test.

[lastnamewithheld]

I'm so sorry charliefox ... it's really easy to feel defeated and negative in this process. I am hoping that one of those three embryos is it for you!

[lastnamewithheld]

HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BOY DO I have a saga to share with you guys.
So I've mentioned that my old clinic closed/merged with another larger facility about an hour away from me, right? The old facility has been storing my (and all the other patients' specimens, too.) embryos on site for the last 3 years. All of our specimens were transferred to a cryobank within close proximity of the new clinic (again, about an hour away from me) --I'm under the impression that all this transferring of goods took place in January because SURPRISE I got a bill from the new facility in February. OK, fine. I paid it. Then the new IVF coordinator contacted me with a checklist of stuff that I needed to get done prior to starting my FET (in February). I wrapped up my to-do list and did the phone orientation, scheduled shipment of my embryos and ordered my meds. (in March)

BUUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

apparently there's still some paperwork bullshit going on between the old clinic and the cryobank that I feel like everyone was unaware of until like, last week. My embryos were supposed to ship out last Tuesday and arrive at the new clinic on Wednesday--but I got a call from the cryobank on Tuesday saying that the new clinic cancelled the shipment and the lab manager from the cryobank couldn't tell me why (which, yeah, I guess she doesn't necessarily need to know all the details. I'm just thankful that my embryos weren't left out on a porch somewhere like a forgotten amazon package because no one wanted to take custody of them or something, lol.)

Anywhoo, I reached out to the head of embryology at the new clinic (the person who was supposed to receive my embryos and store them until I needed them) --heard nothing. I reached out the coordinator -- WHO SAID SHE'D TALK TO ME MONDAY (This was TUESDAY) and heard nothing until THURSDAY when someone from the office called me and informed me that my shipment was cancelled. UH YEAH, I FREAKING KNOW THIS. So I asked why and she basically did the shruggy guy over the phone and gave me a number of some chairperson of the OB/Gyn dept at the parent hospital group that the old clinic was a part of. So I had been blowing up his voicemail Thursday, Friday, and yesterday.

FINALLY YESTERDAY, *MY ACTUAL RE* Called me and finally let me know what the fuck was going on. It was so nice to hear from him and he basically gave me the run down of everything and answered all the questions that were floating around in my head without having to ask. I think all my crazy rambling messages that I had left on various voicemails have come back to his attention so he stepped in to stop me from spiraling out completely. So anyway, I will hear something from the hospital group that the old clinic was a part of over the next few days/next week and we'll go from there. I'm approximately 10-11 days out from CD21, which was when the coordinator told me I'd have to start lupron for my FET cycle, but again, it's been radio silence for about 10 days from the coordinator.

This is a clusterfuck. But at the end of the day, I'm glad they are being overly cautious and double checking that everything is done properly. I would be a million times more pissed if something happened to my embryos. I don't think my doctor anticipated this snag at all, which is why he worked up my cycle plan and okayed the checklist stuff with the coordinator TWO months ago now. At least I have an idea of what happened, what is happening, and what to expect. And because I'm an idiot who still holds out hope for shit, I'm hoping I don't have to sit out another cycle because of this. But it wouldn't be the end of the world if I had to, I guess.

Side note: It boggles my mind that normies just bang and get pregnant. Just.... I can't even imagine.

[charliefox]

lastnamewithheld, that sounds so stressful! I hope they get their shit together and you can stay on schedule. I also can't wrap my head around how people just get pregnant, and I was one of those people.

[sharebear]

charliefox I'm sorry more didn't make it to blast stage, but three is also great! Keeping fx for good screening results.
lastnamewithheld that is crazy. So so so crazy. Go you for following up with so many people, but seriously WTAF?

AFM - beta was negative and I'm very happy to be done with estrace and progesterone for a while. Each time I've gone on estrace, even lower doses, I've ended up with terrible anxiety and nightmares and difficulty sleeping (among other things). I really was worried about my mental health dealing with all that. Within two days of stopping the estrace, I feel like I'm at my baseline mental/emotional state. And I've had a TON of great sleep, which has been amazing.

I am waiting to get my period, but will probably take a couple months off to regroup before doing another transfer. I assume we will do another single embryo transfer, but am also wondering if we should just do 2. We have 4 embryos left, so if the two fail, we could try another double embryo transfer before doing another retrieval cycle. For some reason, I feel weird about the prospect of another single embryo transfer failing before we switch to double embryo transfers and only being able to do one with the remaining embryos. I know, this is all crazy town talk. Just the things swirling around in my brain right now.

[charliefox]

sharebear, IF makes us all join the crazy train. It's good those thoughts are swirling around, for me it always feels good to have a plan and a little control - deciding what to do with your embryos is control. I can't remember, was this your first transfer? How opposed are you to twins? Are your embryos tested?

We had 3 untested embryos last time and only put one in each time because we are very against twins. However, like with all things IF, as time goes on our desires and thoughts shifted and H and I both said that after 2 failed single embryo transfers we would have totally transferred 2 the next time if we had them. With tested embryos I don't think we would ever transfer 2.

Good luck with your decision, and we're here for you even if/when you decide to take time to regroup.

[sharebear]

Thanks charliefox. We have four untested embryos and this was my first transfer. DH and I are pretty low risk, per the RE, so he didn’t strongly recommend testing during this first retrieval. We aren’t opposed to twins, but it’s a risk we would accept if the chances were better and if repeated SETs aren’t going to be successful. If I spiraled this hard from just one round of estrogen + progesterone, I honestly don’t know how many cycles of that I can handle. So if a double embryo transfer will expedite the process in order to preserve my mental health, I will take it. That or I may need to consider some sort of anti anxiety med for just while I’m on estrogen meds. I feel like a drama queen but I’ve never felt so mentally bad in my life.

[champagne]

charliefox I’m so sorry you didn’t end up with more but I’m hoping one of those 3 embies is your take home baby.

sharebear I’m sorry this cycle didn’t work out. I hope whether you decide to do 1 or 2 next time it sticks. I’m sorry the meds have been so rough on you.

lastnamewithheld I can’t believe how crazy this clinic change has been for you. I’m glad they didn’t loose your embryos.

As for me, I have a doctor appointment tomorrow. Still thinking of trying a iui next cycle if my doc is on board. I just hate not having a plan. So even if it’s a slim chance it’s better than no chance to me right now. IF is the worst. I too can’t believe people just get knocked up. It’s crazy to me after 6 years of trying that I’m still here.

[charliefox]

sharebear, all totally understandable. After 3 failed transfers we took Jan & Feb off and it was sooooooo nice to feel like myself again! I didn't even realize how awful the hormones and the stress were until it was all gone.

[wineandcake]

Hi! Possible TW***

It's now been 3 months since my D&C, yesterday was CD1 (making for only a 23 day cycle :/ not happy about that). Looks like we're going ahead with our 4th and final FET. This time they want to do a natural cycle which I'm not thrilled about, but I guess they're the experts.

For anyone who has done a natural cycle, when do they typically start monitoring? They tend to not listen to a word I say, so I'm assuming they won't even ask about cycle length and start monitoring when they typically do for everyone else. I tend to ovulate early so hopefully it's not too late in the cycle. Ugh, I just hate this clinic so much and can't wait to never interact with them again. If anyone is in Ontario and considering MountSinai, be prepared for terrible customer service.

[charliefox]

wineandcake, I'm so sorry your clinic is such a pain. I would push, push, and push for earlier monitoring. I've never done a natural FET but I'm interested in knowing how it goes.

[charliefox]

Got the call from the PGS testing facility today, 2 out of 3 embryos are normal! I'm pleased, 2 chances.

I have a hysteroscopy next Tues and then starting my mock cycle for the ERA test.

[wineandcake]

I was able to talk to a nurse today and we decided to do some investigating before we go for a transfer. Thank goodness. I've had such heavy bleeding lately and with a 23 day cycle we feel much better if we check everything out first. Should go for some type of hysteroscopy or sono something in the next week. I'm just glad they're finally doing something instead of just saying everything is fine and to go ahead.

[wineandcake]

Great news charliefox! I hope all goes well for you.

[charliefox]

wineandcake, glad they're investigating before your last transfer. I hope they find a simple answer.

[champagne]

charliefox Yay for two normal embies!

wineandcake I’m glad they’re going to do some investigation before the final transfer. I hope it all goes smooth.

[lastnamewithheld]

So for those of you following along with my saga:
My RE called me last week to give me a progress report (Cliff notes: my old clinic merged with a new clinic and clusterfuckery ensued) with regard to my embryos and my cycle. He mentioned that the way the old clinic categorized and inventoried specimens were different from how the new clinic does so that's the hangup-they had to convert all the transferred specimens to the new system. OKAY that makes sense. BUT he told me that he'd try to hasten the process for me, (<3) because he knows how long I've been waiting and, frankly, I think he's tired of me calling and questioning the office every week, lol. Squeaky wheel and all that.

So YESTERDAY the lab manager at the cryobank called and told me that the head of embryology at the new clinic set up the shipment of embryos from the cryobank to the new clinic for TUESDAY! So I'm supposed to call in on CD1 and hopefully get my calendar etc.

YAY OMG we might actually finally get to start this shit!

[charliefox]

lastnamewithheld, whooohooooo!!!